Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog, Episode 1.12. Birth of a Salesman

Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog, Episode 1.12. Birth of a Salesman
Original Air Date: September 8th, 1993

These days, the “Sonic” cast – across the games, the comics, and all sorts of other stuff – measures in the hundreds. This was not the case in the early days of the franchise. “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog” even predates the introduction of Knuckles or Amy Rose. Aside from a collection of Badniks, the game cast was basically Sonic, Tails, and Robotnik. This is why “SatAM” had to take the little animals Sonic rescues and morph them into the Freedom Fighters. And it's why seemingly every other episode of “AoStH” introduced some random new character. One or two of these guys would become minor fan favorites...

...which brings us to “Birth of a Salesman.” The episode begins with Robotnik bemoaning his lack of competent help, insulting Scratch and Grounder. That's when a door-to-door salesman named Wes Weasely stops by. He proceeds to sell Robotnik a series of contraptions: A vacuum that can suck out light, a freeze ray, an anti-gravity ray, and a de-atomizing beam. Each machine is used against Sonic, before the hedgehog outsmarts the easily-fooled Scratch and Grounder, turning the new gizmos against them.

As far as “AoStH's” contributions to the grander “Sonic” lore goes, Wes Weasely does not seem like an especially memorable contribution. He's the hoariest of gag: The duplicitous door-too-door salesman. (Of course, this comedic trope is totally discredited now, as I don't think many items are sold door-to-door anymore.) The minute he walks on-screen, Wes is super easy to figure out. Obviously, he's going to scam Robotnik over and over again until the episode ends. That's what happens every time a cartoon introduces a traveling salesman like this. Also, he doesn't look a thing like a weasel and that bugs me too. However, I do like how verbosely named the gadgets he sells are or how surreal some of them are. That light-sucking vacuum, especially, which renders the top half of the screen black when activated.

Wes being a scummy salesman isn't the only gag in this episode that's very easily predicted. Even though the episode begins with Robotnik berating his primary henchman, he still trusts Scratch and Grounder with the new equipment every time. Predictably, Sonic outsmarts the robotic simpletons within minutes on each occasion. And not even in especially novel ways. Sonic literally just crouches under the black cloud the light vacuum causes. With the freeze ray, he just moves out of the way, so the robots can freeze each other He doesn't even do anything to fuck up the de-atomizer, as Scratch and Grounder press the wrong button themselves and accidentally clone the hedgehog instead. (Though the clones using popcorn offensively is, if nothing else, unexpected.) The only time Sonic actually uses his brain to defeat the robots is by tricking them with the anti-gravity ray, in a rather tedious moment. Look, I get that Scratch and Grounder are dumb and Sonic is always going to outsmart them. But I feel like the writers really phoned it in on this one.

Watching as a child, I don't remember “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog” being especially gross, by the standards of early nineties kids cartoons. Watching as an adult, I'm really picking up on a weird grotesque streak in this show. Over the course of this twenty minutes, Grounder sprouts disturbingly human-like hands. Sonic melts the robot chicken and his drilling friend after kicking up a firestorm, their faces slowly dissolving in a strangely vivid fashion. Robotnik smothers his henchman with his enormous ass, which receives far too much attention from the animators. The episode ends with the bad guys having their body parts switched around. That's an awful lot of body horror for a kid's show, along side the typically unimpressive slapstick of Grounder pressing a button unexpectedly or Sonic madly running around the countryside.

Still, as is quickly becoming the case, the delivery of the voice cast generates an occasional chuckle. Long John Baldry continues to be the MVP of this show. “Birth of a Salesman” begins with Robotnik shouting a long-winded avalanche of alliterative insults at his blundering robots, which is an amusingly stretched-out gag. Among the factors he likes about Weaslly, he casually throws in “And you dress funny.” He demands Sonic is not killed but merely captured, so he can “gloat at him.” Surprisingly, some of the other voice actors gets laughs too. Jaleel White gets to subvert Sonic's “I'm waaaaaiting!” catchphrase in a funny way. Michael Donovan adapts a Charles Neslon Riley-like voice for Wes Weaselly and his brief comment about being a “tyrant-to-tyrant salesman” got a single laugh out of me.

-Writers Steven J. Fisher, Reed Shelley and Bruce Shelley must have been really proud of Wes Weaselly because they incorporate him into the Sonic Sez segment as well. Our moral this time takes the form of a toy commercial, presented by Wes, which impresses Tails enough hat he immediately heads out to buy the product... Before being hti with a number of pricey add-ons. “If it looks too good to be true, it probably is” is the intended moral. Yet this lesson comes off as awfully hypocritical from a cartoon show designed to sell video games. Are all the Sonci Sez moments going to be this hilariously tone-deaf?

If you're reading this, you definitely already know why this episode is of minor importance to “Sonic” nerds. Wes Weaselly is among the “AoStH” characters Ian Flynn would revive for the post-reboot comic universe. Granted, it was for a single panel appearance. I wonder if he would've brought him back if the comic hadn't been canceled? Anyway, the episode itself is probably my least favorite episode of the show so far, which bodes well. Only sixty-two left to go! [5/10]

Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog, Episode 1.16. Tails' New Home

Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog, Episode 1.16. Tails' New Home
Original Air Date: September 7th, 1993

While the first episode of “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog” to air focused on Sonic battling Robotnik, the second-to-air episode smartly turns its focus on Sonic and Tails' friendship. “Tails' New Home” begins with the two-tailed fox almost getting hurt while the duo fights Scratch and Grounder. Worried the adventurer life-style might be too perilous for his little buddy, Sonic sets out to find Tails a home. First, they meet with an extremely clumsy stork family, which is no safer for Tails. Second, the two encounter Sgt. Doberman, a crazed former drill sergeant. Lastly, a pair of elderly two-tailed foxes identify themselves as Tails' parents. It seems like an ideal home for Sonic's sidekick but, naturally, this is a trap.

Despite it being one of the most common feature of the entire franchise, there haven't been too many attempts to provide an origin for Sonic and Tails' friendship. If I'm remembering correctly, the instructional manual for “Sonic 2” simply described Tails as an enthusiastic fan of Sonic who started following him, and imitating his trademark moves, one day. The Archie comic series wouldn't get around to explaining this background until the “Sonic Kids 2” special, published in March 1999, six years after the series began. “SatAM” never explained it. Surprisingly, one of the least serious iterations of “Sonic” put this information out front early on. Here, we find out Tails is a foundling who stumbled into Sonic when he tried to live life as a bird. Sonic decided to watch out for the kid, and the two just stuck together ever since.

The flashback that actually depict this first meeting is a little heavy on the wacky slapstick “Adventures” was fond of. However, Sonic and Tails' friendship ends up forming the very sweet emotional backbone of the episode. The details of their first meeting is pretty cute, especially the way Sonic gave Tails his nickname after learning he hates his birth name of Miles. Tails' assumed birth parents tell Sonic the fox is where he belongs, causing the hedgehog to shed a single tear. It's further established that Sonic feels seriously lost without his little buddy in the next scene. But Sonic goes along with it because he thinks it's the right decision. “Adventures” wasn't a show that handled sincere emotion very often, from what I recall, so it's nice to see Sonic and Tails' genuine brotherhood – the "love" word even being used in the final scene – get so much attention.

Contrasting with these cute moments in “Tails' New Home” is a strain of disturbingly grotesque slapstick. The opening chase scene with Scratch and Grounder features a landscape so abstract, and the unnerving sight of Tails screaming and turning inside out is so surreal, I assumed it to be a dream sequence. Nope, this episode is just like that. At one point, Sonic puffs up his body to extremely buff, Schwarzeneggerian proportions before melting into a puddle. Huge knots grow out of Sonic and Tails' heads during their first meeting. After running into a wall, Robotnik yanks an unpleasantly squishy brick out of his eyeball. Equally inexplicable moments involve Sonic's arms spinning around like a clock or Tails' parents – revealed to be ant-headed robots – being smushed together into a can of applesauce for no particular reason. I don't remember the show being this fucking weird but I'm betting I'll be numbed to this shit soon enough.

Otherwise, “Tails' New Home” continues the trend of “Adventures” episode having one or two decent gags and many more not-so-amusing ones. During the painfully unfunny sequence involving the idiotic storks that try to adopt Tails, there's a brief shot of a goldfish making out his last will and testament before his bowl is overturned. That reminds me of something you'd see in a Tex Avery cartoon. While Sgt. Doberman makes Sonic and Tails perform rigorous military exercise, Sonic – uncharacteristically winded – says his wife is supposed to be nice. This moment also results in a meme-worthy moment of Tails' tail turning into an American flag. Long John Baldry got more laughs from me, for the colorful way Robotnik decides to give himself a promotion or the way he digs into the ridiculous names of the various traps laid for Sonic.

But, yes, the annoying gags once again outnumber the decent ones. Scratch's shrieked declarations of greatness or Grounder's nincompoop grumblings irritate. Sonic's various disguises, including a firefighter and an especially transparent postman costume, did not make me smile. The stork family's incredible idiocy, which leads them to almost burning down and flooding their houses within a few minutes, is tiring. There's even a joke about airline food. Also, of course, catchphrases and bad animations are present. Sonic says he's waiting, Robotnik says he hates that hedgehog, and characters awkwardly spin through the air more than once. I really need to get use to this shit, I've got sixty-four more of these to watch.

We wrap up with an especially baffling Sonic Sez. In it, Sonic meets Coconut who is running away from Dr. Robotnik's fortress, because the doctor mistreats him. Sonic encourages the robotic monkey to return home, by pointing out that he's just a kid that can't take care of himself. That even the difficulties of living at home is preferable to living on the streets. While I understand the point of this message – don't try and run away from home, kids – this is a bad example. It's sort of shitty to tell children from abusive home that they shouldn't leave. In fact, this sequence only makes sense once your realize Coconuts is an enemy of Sonic and the hedgehog wants the Badnik to suffer. Which, ya know, was probably not the intended moral here.

Anyway, “Tails' New Home” worked better for me than “Best Hedgehog.” I liked the stuff centering on Sonic and Tails' friendship, even if the rest of the episode has little to recommend about it. Will decent half-hours like this be typical of the show or is this an outlier? I guess I'll find out soon enough but I can already kind of guess at an answer. [7/10]

Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog (1993), Episode 1.13. Best Hedgehog

Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog (1993), Episode 1.13. Best Hedgehog
Original Air Date: September 6th, 1993

I began my retrospective of “SatAM” by talking about its opening sequence and theme song. It only seems fair to grant “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog” the same treatment. Because both songs and openings truly reflect the show's differing styles and approaches. “SatAM's” shows how Robotnik took over Mobius and that the Freedom Fighters are waging a guerrilla war against him, while the theme song was a powerful wave of cock-rock declaring Sonic the fastest motherfucker around.

“Adventures'” opening, meanwhile, is a series of wacky comic relief gags in which Sonic – his name appearing on-screen as many times as possible – triumphs over his goofball adversaries with ease. It's so carefree, a happy smiling sun is one of the first things we see. The theme song, meanwhile, is an aggressively upbeat instrumental that recalls “Flight of the Bumblebee,” “In the Hall of the Mountain King,” and the Green Hill Zone score.

One is grim but radical in that very nineties sort of way. The other is silly, slapstick-y, and overwhelmingly familiar. See, kids, openings were once meant to actually tell you what the show was about, not just be a thing you skip on Netflix.

Another element of “AoStH” that must be discussed upfront is its visual approach. While “SatAM” strove for a certain degree of interior coherence visually, “Adventures” was not bound by the same limitations. The backgrounds the characters interact with are often sparse, surreal landscapes of weird shapes and pastel colors. Characters staying on-model is not so important here, as the slapstick tone allows for an expected degree of stretch-and-squish. Because of its lackadaisical approach to such things, the syndicated show can get away with odd looking characters or apparent humans interacting with cartoon animals with no explanation. Which is apparent in scenes in this episode, when we see a cartoon human teaching a class room full of strange looking zoo animals.

So, where do these “Adventures” begin? The first episode to air, and the thirteenth to be produced, is “Best Hedgehog.” It has Sonic and Tails breaking into Robotnik's egotistically designed fortress to free a prisoner that's been locked up for thirty years. When our heroes meet the guy, Lucas, he's nothing but a draping pile of hair with limbs and a face. Robotnik's interest in keeping Lucas locked-up is totally personal. Back in high school, they both lusted after a girl named Lucinda. Lucas won her heart, Robotnik didn't. Now that Lucas is free, Sonic and Tails try to match him back up with Lucinda – now working as a school teacher – before Robotnik finds all of them.

Okay, so this cartoon is a comedy. Did it make laugh? I think the expectations for humor are different when you're an adult, versus when you're a five year old child. (Which is what I would have been when this first aired.) As a kid, I might have laughed when Sonic defeats Scratch and Grounder with ease, tricking the extremely dumb robots into be snatched by their own easily avoided traps. Or when Sonic defeats Robotnik and his robo-goons by rolling up a seemingly giant carpet and spinning it towards them. As a boring grown-up, I find myself more attracted to the more subtle jokes. Like Scratch and Grounder being presented with a number of rewards and Grounder requesting a humble toolbox. As an adult, I also notice shit like the Scooby-Doo stock “bumbling footstep” sound effect putting in an appearance, marking this as a rather hackneyed type of kid's cartoon.

Much of the humor in “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog” is taken from the extremeness of its characters' personalities. Such as Scratch and Grounder's idiocy. Or Sonic's ability to overtake his opponent, which results in a probably justified degree of egomania. Throughout this first episode, Sonic mocks and belittles Robotnik by dressing up as a doctor or a chief. He repeatedly uses randomly appearing props: a giant frying pan, a massive spring that bounces a weaponized egg back. This also includes a mirror, which he bounces laser blasts with after admiring his own reflection. Sonic is given the very annoying catchphrase of “I'm waiting!,” which he rolls out three times. (Tails says it too.)  He repeatedly breaks the fourth wall. Let's just say Jalleel White's nasal whine has never been more grating.

Probably the most notorious gag in this episode – the entire show really – is when Sonic dresses up as Lucinda to fool Robotnik. Naturally, the bad guy doesn't recognize Sonic or even notice that his very human high school crush now appears to be a hedgehog in a wig. Yes, “Best Hedgehog” relies a lot on the old-time-y assumption that a male in a dress is inherently humorous. About the only thing that makes this joke genuinely amusing is how stretched out it is. Robotnik and Sonic-as-Lucinda make it all the way to the chapel before Robotnik notices the deception. Which kind of makes me wonder just how far exactly Sonic was willing to take this one.

While the “Adventures” version of Sonic is kind of annoying, I couldn't help but find this take on Robotnik to be pretty amusing. Beloved blues musician Long John Baldry probably wasn't having his proudest moment playing a goofy bad guy on a shitty kid's cartoon – he sang with the Beatles and the Rolling Stones – but he sure attacks the role with gusto. He gets some of the episode's funniest lines. Such as teenage Robotnik, who had the mustache even then, groveling at Lucinda when she rejects his romantic overturn. Later, he hypes himself up before meeting the girl again by practicing threatening slogans. There's a decent sequence, were the extreme differences between Robotnik and Lucas' recollection of events are shown. That stuff made me chuckle a little and Baldry committing so hard to the bit helps tremendously.

I can't say if I really like “Best Hedgehog” much. Lucas is such a whiny character, that it's hard to like him too much. (Even if getting locked up for thirty years, strictly because a villain liked the same girl as you, is a pretty bum deal.) It doesn't help that his Captain Caveman-esque character design is deeply unappealing looking. There is a certain humor to a mad scientist/dictator like Robotnik still longing for his high school crush. Upright folks like Lucas and Lucinda still holding the torches is less endearing. I do think it's sort of sweet that Sonic and Tails are so determined to help this random political prisoner get laid again. Though it is odd that this was chosen as the first episode to air, considering the focus really isn't on Sonic for the majority of its run time.

This is also sort of an action cartoon, after all, which is where “Best Hedgehog” really fails. The early scene of Sonic fighting off some weird pink octopus-looking robots doesn't inspire much interest. Neither does a moment where Sonic and the gang have to escape an erupting volcano, which he does by drilling a hole down to the frozen Arctic. This isn't a path to escape. Instead, he buzz-saws out a giant block of ice (which results in a very confused polar bear, another decent gag) and then surfs along the lava on it. I know, I know, I can't let leaps in logic like that bother me. I presume by the time I've reviewed sixty of these fucking things, I will be totally numb to such cartoon-y conflict resolutions.

Among the many meme-worthy elements fans remember about “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog,” the Sonic Sez segment at the end of each episode – where Sonic delivers some real life-applicable moral lesson to the kiddies watching at home – is especially notorious. This was a common feature in nineties children entertainment, probably an attempt by moral guardians to impose some sort of edutainment factor on action-driven shows designed to sell toys. “G.I. Joe” was a prominent pioneer of this “The more you know!” style in-show PSA, with programs like “Captain Planet,” “Power Rangers,” and the English dub of “Sailor Moon” following that lead. With “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog,” serious attempts to educate the viewer came off as especially strange, since the show proceeding them was so very inane. I mean, do you really want a blue cartoon hedgehog that runs fast teaching your kids about the joy of reading, about how kids who have trouble reading should be treated with sympathy, as he does here? Sonic doesn't really seem like the type to appreciate a good book much anyway.

But that bizarre disconnect is just one of the things that made the nineties such a gloriously stupefying decade. I wouldn't say the first proper episode of “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog” is stupefying, gloriously or otherwise. It's mildly amusing, occasionally annoying, and mostly utterly disposable. This retrospective is off to a great start! [6/10]

Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog, 1.00. Pilot

Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog, 1.00. Pilot
Original Air Date: Unaired

This journey does not begin in the place you might be expecting. Like most series, “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog” was proceeded by a pilot. It was produced in-house in America, with Kent Butterworth and Milton Knight being the primary crew behind the storyboards and animation. Running all of seven minutes, this is probably the earliest animated iteration of Sonic and friends you're ever going to see...

Though you probably haven't seen it. Unlike the “SatAM” pilot, which aired at the end of that show's first season, the “Adventures” pilot was unreleased for many years. The pilot was a whispered-about bit of obscure, unseen “Sonic” lore until 2009. That's when Milton Knight posted it to Youtube. Me being the obsessive compulsive nerd I am, I naturally had to start here.

Since “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog” was never a heavily plotted series, the short pilot is even more light on story than usual. We see a series of scenarios, in which Sonic defends the innocent citizens of the still unnamed Mobius from the villainous machinations of the buffoonish Dr. Robotnik. He attempts to drain a village's lake away, in addition to badgering a community of bunnies and a group of gorillas. In several separate incidents, the doctor attacks Sonic with a horde of robots, a cannon, a giant crushing weight, and by drilling under his beach.

Deciphering the plot of this pilot is even more difficult due to the rough quality it survives in. The version on Youtube has no music or sound effects. Some sequences are even without dialogue, being rendered entirely silent. The only cast member from the finished show is Jaleel White as Sonic. Jim Cummings plays Robotnik, before Long John Baldry stepped into this version of the role, and Gary Owens voices an omniscient narrator. The visuals are blurry and tracking lines appeared more than once.

That narrator and Cummings' presence are two of the more notable ways the pilot is different from the show that would follow. It seems Owens, functioning as an enthusiastic narrator, was originally intended to be a regular feature of the show. In many ways, the pilot has more in common with the video games than the show did. The environments resemble the video game's backgrounds more, with Sonic even racing through a Green Hill Zone-style loop at one point. Twice, Robotnik pilots his Egg-O-Matic, outfitted with a drill bit and that giant checkered wrecking ball. Several of the video game's Badniks, such as Chop Chop and Octus, appear briefly too. The pilot also emphasizes the freedom fighting more, which would perhaps be rolled into “SatAM.”

Despite the differences, the “Adventures” pilot is still pretty similar to the cartoon that would spawn from it. The sequence where Robotnik tries to drop a giant weight on Sonic, just to get smooshed himself, would be recycled as the end credits animation for the show. The other Mobians Sonic encounters are similarly weird looking. Aside from the lion king and his gorilla fighters – the type of subtle wordplay you should get use to – most of the civilians we see are weirdly defined creatures that resemble no specific animal. While a whole horde of robots show up, Scratch and Grounder still emerge as Robotnik's primary toadies. The episode even concludes with the first of many “Sonic Sez” segments, featured here with the more grammatically correct but less tubular spelling of “Says,” with Sonic instructing Tails to look both ways before crossing the street.

(The pilot also features the image of Sonic sitting in a beach chair under a parasol, wearing sunglasses and sipping a drink. That's an image that would appear in a lot of stock art in the franchise's early years.)

The biggest similarity of all is the sophomoric slapstick that occupies most of the pilot. Over the course of seven minutes, we see a lot of goofy gags. Robotnik fires a cactus at Sonic, only for the cactus to get tired and stop flying. After Sonic defaces a sign of Robotnik, it cries. Once the bad guy is flattened into a pancake, Scratch and Grounder simply re-inflate him with a bicycle pump. A bird lays an egg on Robotnik's head and Sonic frequently breaks the fourth wall, directing his raditude directly at the viewer. It's fun in its own goofy way but this is not especially cutting edge humor.

Mostly, the “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog” pilot will be most interesting to longtime “Sonic” fans and historians like myself. It is interesting to see such a relic resurface, twenty years after it was created. From what I can recall, the pilot does give us a good preview of what is to come. [6/10]

Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog Reviews: Introduction

The “Sonic the Hedgehog” fandom is bad. I feel like this is self-evident. “Sonic” fans are weird. They are too passionate, too open about their grosser qualities, and too willing to bicker endlessly with you about what the “true” version of “Sonic” is. This is because the “Sonic the Hedgehog” fandom is divided. Is “Sonic” a nineties platforming game? Is it a mid-2000s 3D adventure game with an open-world hub and fishing side-quests? Is it a lore-filled comic book series, full of serious themes? A loosely plotted series of light-hearted adventures? Is Sonic himself a nineties smart-ass with a bad attitude? Or someone who loves his friends and will do anything to protect them?

The truth is, this division is baked into the very soul of the franchise. There has never actually been a consistent version of “Sonic.” In Japan, he was conceived as a wacky but cuddly cartoon character in the tradition of Mickey Mouse or Felix the Cat. Sega of America, however, was allowed to sell “Sonic” over here however they saw fit. So Sonic was an in-your-face, Bart Simpsons-like rebel in the U.S., which was the hip thing all the American kids were into at the time. (In retrospect, trying to sell a blue mascot that runs fast and bops robots on the head as something serious was... Kind of weird.)

Even in the U.S., there wasn't much across-media coherence concerning this particular blue hedgehog. I already covered this a little in my “SatAM” introduction. Hot off the success of the first two Genesis games, Sega ran to DiC Entertainment to develop a cartoon based on the newly popular property. As DiC had done with “Mario,” they developed an aggressively wacky comedy series wherein Sonic was a merry prankster and Robotnik was an incompetent, goofball villain. “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog” even reeled in Jaleel White – otherwise known as the obnoxiously-voiced, and briefly extremely popular, sitcom character Steve Urkel – to voice the titular hedgehog.

You already know what happened next. ABC passed on “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog,” asking for a more plot-driven series, which led to the development of “SatAM.” Instead of abandoning the zany show they had worked so much on, DiC continued working on “Adventures.” These programs would hit the airwaves around the same time, with “SatAM” premiering on ABC on September 25th 1993 and “Adventures” beginning its run in syndication a few weeks earlier on September 9th. 

So two “Sonic” cartoons with wildly different tones and styles were on television at the exact same time. So you can see why “Sonic” fans have been so intrinsically divided from the very beginning. Is Sonic a Freedom Fighter waging a guerrilla war against an authoritarian tyrant, in a grim post-industrial wasteland, with his group of friends? Or was he a screwball goof punking an idiotic adversary, in a colorful cartoon world, with Tails as his only consistent companion? The answer to both questions is, somehow, yes. And simultaneously! No matter fans can't decide on what the hell this character is and what this series is about.

Weirdly, this never confused me as a kid. On weekend mornings, I would watch Sonic mourn Uncle Chuck and fight the destruction of the environment. On weekday evenings, I could see Sonic dress in drag and hear Robotnik brag about how fat he was. Despite how different the shows were, I loved them both because kid-me loved Sonic, regardless of what he was doing or who he was hanging out with. Children are able to accept strange shit like this at face-value, I guess. Mostly, my memories of “Adventures” are confined to watching the show at my friend's house in the evenings after his dad finished watching – sigh – “The Rush Limbaugh Show.”  Somehow, both Sonic and Rush are newly relevant again here in 2020! The new century is weird.

Anyway: Much like “SatAM,” “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog” would develop a long-lived fandom. While “SatAM's” spirit lived on through a ridiculously long-running comic book and a passionate cult following,  the awkwardly abbreviated “AoStH'” lived on via internet memes and Youtube Poops. Some of this quasi-popularity might be owed to “AoStH's” surprisingly enduring afterlife. While “SatAM” would largely only be rerun in obscure cable showtimes, “AoStH” aired in syndication for years afterwards and even had a shockingly well-promoted re-airing on Toon Disney. (That was Disney's sort-of defunct attempt to compete with Cartoon Network, to you goddamn zoomers.) Shout Factory would release both shows on DVD around the same time, cementing the link between them.

So what do I think about “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog?” Even as a kid, I was not especially passionate about this iteration of my favorite blue hedgehog. Yes, even as a youngster, I turned my nose up a bit at the sophomoric slapstick of this series and only regularly watched it because it starred a pop culture obsession I've never let go of for some reason. In my few attempts to return to “Adventures” as an adult, I've found the show to be a sub-”Ren and Stimpy” program that was cheaply animated and leaned way too hard on the aggressive wackiness. This retrospective will be the first time I've actually sat down and re-watched the show, maybe for the first time in my entire life. I'm sure there's episodes I missed as a kid.

Also, this is going to take a little while longer than “SatAM” did. “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog's” syndicated run includes sixty-five episodes. So I'm fully expected this journey to annoy and tire me out very quickly but, well, I'm committed to this bullshit. (By the way, I'll be following the air date order for the show, as opposed to the radically different production order.) Prepare your pingas, rev up your Mean Bean Machine, but don't click away because that's no good. We are going to go on some “Adventures,” here at Hedgehogs Can't Swim.

Sonic the Hedgehog (IDW): Issue 26

Sonic the Hedgehog (IDW): Issue 26
Publication Date: March 4, 2020

Throughout these IDW reviews, over the last year, I’ve done pretty nothing but bitch about when the Metal Virus Crisis will be over. Point of fact, I’m tired of being tired of it. Say what you will about the first year’s Neo Metal Sonic saga but, once it got going, the pacing was extremely strong. This story arc has officially been going for a year now. It’s only been in the last few weeks that an actual end is now in sight. It’ll be over by Issue 30, which should come out in May, assuming there are no further delays. So Flynn looks to be wrapping this shit up in two months, via three issues. Which might explain why the pacing is finally starting to move again...

In fact, you know the end is neigh for this particular plot point because issue 26 is the start of a four-parter. “Sonic” comics love four-parters! “All or Nothing, Part One” has the remnants of the Restoration, now aligned with it’s greatest enemy, thinking of a strategy to take the Chaos Emeralds back from the power mad Deadly Six. Tails and Robotnik successfully reverse-engineer a portal generator from the Warp Topaz. The team splits up in two different sets, each heading off against the different Zetis. Sonic and Knuckles stay behind to keep an eye on Eggman, who is definitely planning something.

On the surface, issue 26 is yet another comic devoted to brass tacks narrative construction. Flynn spends a lot of time on detailing what characters will be headed in which directions. Tails and Amy take on Zomom. Whisper and Silver go after Zor. The Babylon Rogues face off with Master Zik. Espio goes after Zazz, after Knuckles decides to stay on the island. Gemerl is suppose to take on Zeena alone but Cream runs ahead of him. Rouge, meanwhile, is abroad the Faceship and sneaking around behind Zavok’s back, with Orbot and Cubot trying to distract him. In the abstract, that sounds pretty fucking tedious.

Yet, this month, Flynn remembers he has a fairly lovable cast of characters in a dynamic situation here. A lot of issue 26 focuses on character interaction and it ends up saving an otherwise perfunctory plot. During a moment when refugees are setting up camp on Angel Island — reminding us that, yes, everyday folk are still being affected by this — Espio and Knuckles have a brief talk. While still maintaining his stoic exterior, Espio makes it clear that the loss of Vector and Charmy is weighing on him. That he has lost many, and many more are in danger, and everything is riding on this one mission. Knuckles, in turns, tries to build his friend up. It’s one panel but the acknowledgment that these characters have anxieties, fears, and feelings helps a lot.

Also surprising is how, for the first time since introducing them in this comic book, Flynn makes me care about Cream and Gemerl. Despite being written like an emotional machine up to this point, Gemerl shows actual affection to the little bunny. When he says he’s going alone, she demands to come. Which cause him to respond that she has already proven her bravery, that she means too much to him to loose her. That’s... pretty sweet actually. When Cream leaps into the portal first, it’s a ballsy move from a character that has spent way too much time being nothing but a trauma sponge over the last year. Granted, this plan immediately goes wrong, seemingly because the Restoration forgot Gemerl is a robot, but that moment of emotion counts for a lot.

By far the juiciest interaction is the one with the least effect in the plot. Eggman builds Sonic a treadmill, to further stave off the ever-encroaching Metal Virus. This leads to a conversation, possibly hinting at how the characters’ motivations have evolved. The Mr. Tinker persona showed Sonic that there is good in Eggman. So now the hedgehog hopes to redeem, instead of merely defeating, his enemy. (This is very different from Archie Robotnik, who was proven to be irredeemable more than once.) Eggman, meanwhile, turns the table and tries to convince Sonic there’s something bad inside him, as he’s been helping spread the Metal Virus with his endless running. Whether Flynn plans on building on this idea — Eggman isn’t all evil, Sonic isn’t always heroic, and they both know it — remains to be seen.

While I’m obviously bias to character development, that’s not the only thing that improves the pacing this time around. Instead of ending on the obvious cliffhanger of everyone heading off to face their various enemies, Flynn has the issue stick around a little longer. We actually see the good guys scuffle a little with their chosen Zeti. In other words, Flynn isn’t just setting up the plot movement, the plot actually starts to move. Granted, I care about some of these scenarios more than others. Tails and Amy trying to outsmart the very not-smart Zomom provides some comic relief. (There’s actually a bit of much needed humor in this issue, with Knuckles’ confusion and Sonic’s obvious distrust of Eggman.) Espio sneaking around Zazz is mildly tense. On the other hand, the Babylon Rogues taking on Master Zik is so tedious. It’s the least interesting “good” guys, if you can call them that, taking on the most boring Zeti. For whatever reason, Flynn gives that fight the most page time here. Maybe the fans who actually give a shit about the birds would have a different reaction to that scene...

The artwork is also slightly uneven. Evan Stanley draws about half of the issue and does typically good work. Her facial expressions are especially strong, just exaggerated enough to give us a sense of the extreme emotions our characters are feeling. Priscilla Tramontano handles most of the Zeti related strengths. It’s clear Tramontano is still fine tuning her skills here. Her action scenes are somewhat awkward, everyone coming off as a bit stiff. Rouge bends in a weird way in one panel. Silver, Zor, and Zik all look kind of goofy in their fight scenes. It’s clear there are some “Sonic” cast members she draws a little better than others. I think she’ll keep improving as she continues to work on the book though.

Flaws and all, this is one of the better issues of the comic recently. I wish Flynn could balance character development, plot, and action this well more often. I’m actually looking forward to what’s happening next month! Though that may just be because this thing is finally almost over... [7/10]

Sonic the Hedgehog (1994) Reviews: Conclusion

Here's an obvious statement. It takes a lot less time to review a 26 episode TV show than it does to review a comic book series that ran for 24 years across multiple titles. Even with numerous setbacks and a month-long hiatus, watching and reviewing “SatAM” took a mere fraction of the amount of time it took me to read and review all of Archie's “Sonic” comic. While I had four whole years to gather my thoughts about Archie's iteration of Sega's super-fast blue hedgehog, I've been provided with considerably less time to figure out and sum up exactly how I feel about the Saturday morning cartoon version that inspired my beloved comic book.

Here's the truth: This was only the second time I've really seen “SatAM” in its entirety. Despite the prominent place it holds in my childhood memory, I don't think I saw every single episode when it originally aired on ABC. (At least, I don't have memories of seeing every episode in its original time slot.) The first time I experienced the show as a whole was when it was released on DVD in 2007, watching not as a wide-eyed child but a cynical high school graduate. At that time, I went in with measured, somewhat anxious expectations. I was all too aware of the role nostalgia can play in scenarios like this. I half-expected this thing I adored as a kid to, when looked upon with adult eyes, be revealed as god awful garbage. Instead, I was shocked and impressed that “SatAM” was nearly as good as I remembered it. This confirmed in my mind that this show was genuinely an unappreciated masterpiece of '90s animation.

That was, somehow, almost thirteen years ago. I guess I've changed some in the decade-and-change that has passed since the first time I revisited “SatAM.” Upon this watch-through, the flaws of 1993's “Sonic the Hedgehog” became far more apparent. At least as far as production values go, this was not a program that rose above the pack very often. For every well animated moment, there was another that was stiff, awkward, or half-finished. The surprisingly good score of the first season was replaced in the second with a far cheesier synth score. The comic relief was frequently annoying and became almost unbearable in the episodes that focused on it. The writing staff were not above lazy narrative shortcuts. Ben Hurst, Pat Allee, and the show's other best writers were good at their job but they were still operating under the budget and time crunch inherent to making a cheap, quick cartoon in the early nineties.

While I love the show's characters, I was disappointed to see that few of them were ever given the chance to really shine. Honestly, outside of Sonic, Sally, Robotnik, Snively, and sometimes Uncle Chuck, we never really learn much about any of the central characters. Bunnie, Rotor, and Tails never evolve pass vague archetypes. Antoine and Dulcy are characterized more by their annoying quasi-comedic quirks than their actual histories or personalities. Could it be that my love of Archie's “Sonic” comic, where characters like Bunnie and Rotor were truly allowed to grow and evolve, had reflected on the relatively shallow original cartoon?

I guess your thirties is when you truly realize the shit you loved as a kid was actually not that good.

Still, it's possibly my glowing childhood and mid-teen-hood memories are betraying me a bit. Because “SatAM” is a good show. The emotion it built into its characters was truly something special. When the series was allowed to really take advantage of that, which wasn't nearly often enough, it showed everything a cartoon about a blue hedgehog that runs fast and fights robots can be. Consider most merchandise driven children's programs of the time. You can't really compare “SatAM” to contemporary programs like “Batman: The Animated Series” or “Gargoyles.” Those had the production values and resources of Warner Brothers and Disney behind it. You have to look at the other show DiC was producing at the time. When stacked up against shit like “Captain Planet,” “Street Sharks” or “Double Dragon,” “SatAM” really does seem like an exceptional program willing to tackle unusually deep themes and ideas.

So, here's the truth, the true truth: 1993's “Sonic the Hedgehog” was a cheaply produced kid's cartoon totally typical of its time and place and an unusually well-written show that was far better than it had any right to be. Let us never forget that “SatAM” was created primarily to promote a still young video game franchise. Video games were still being treated largely as a fad at the time. Which is what the mainstream popularity of the “Sonic” series would essentially prove to be, as the franchise never regained the acceptance and wide-spread success it had in the nineties. Considering that, “SatAM” is way weirder, much more interesting, and has far more depth than should've been reasonably expected. It was stuck in the same box as a lot of other mediocre product but a talented group of passionate people were determined to make it something more.

Ultimately, my feelings towards “SatAM” remain far too loaded for me to even be close to objective about it. Yes, this latest re-watch has revealed it as a program with plenty of flaws. At the same time, I can't deny the influence, the power, this silly little cartoon show still shows all these years later. Indeed, I do think there is something special about this particular iteration of “Sonic the Hedgehog.” The characters, the setting, and the themes – nature vs. industry, freedom vs. tyranny, friends vs. conformity – have reverberated through my mind, and even my goddamn soul, more-or-less my entire life. Does the comic series that spawned from “SatAM” truly deserve the credit for this? Maybe. But obviously I wouldn't be writing these words, and you wouldn't be reading them, if “SatAM” hadn't come first.

It's even more obvious that I am not alone in these feelings. Despite the evident limitations the cartoon show has, you don't have to look any further for evidence of its uniqueness than the fandom. Listen, read that list of other DiC programs again. When people remember those shows – or “The Super Mario Bros Supershow,” “Captain N,” even bigger hits like “Inspector Gadget” – it's mostly as a source of cheap nostalgia. You can mentioned those programs or hum the theme songs and you'll get a response of “Hey, I remember that.” But you don't see too many people arguing for the artistic merits of “Hulk Hogan's Rock n' Wrestling” or “Extreme Dinosaurs.”

And, yeah, you can find fan fiction and fan art for almost anything, no matter how dumb, weird, or old it is. Yet the passion with which “SatAM” fans have kept the torch burning is truly impressive. Several fan comics, movie pitches, and even a fan-produced third season require the kind of long-term devotion that is not usually reserved for a two season tie-in from practically 26 years ago. Truly, this boils down to the question of why “Sonic” fans are so uniquely passionate. Autism and furry perversion can only account for so much. The quality of “SatAM” must have something special about it. Reviewing the show for this blog, even if it made me newly aware of its flaws, also reminded me of that too.

So, farewell and adieu “SatAM.” You were a good show. Maybe not the great one I remember but certainly a good one. Moreover, your legacy – at least as far as the overall “Sonic” universe is concerned – is significant. You made me a “Sonic” fan and, well, I guess that obviously counts for something. As for me, dear readers, come back soon as I begin a journey to talk about that other DiC Entertainment blue hedgehog show...