Sonic Boom, Episode 2.47: You and I Bee-come One

Sonic Boom, Episode 2.47: You and I Bee-come One

Original Air Date: October 14th, 2017

Considering how "Sonic Boom" started to bring back previously one-off characters, I expected an episode entitled "You and I Bee-come One" to bring back Amy's pet Beebot, Bea. Nope! Instead, this one starts with Eggman leaving on a vacation. Before he goes, he programs all his Beebots to automatically zero in on Sonic and his friends. The heroes quickly carole the bugs into a cave. While this is happening, Tails is testing his new matter transporter on himself. A Beebot swoops into the teleporter at the last second. The device acts as a gene-splicer, Tails and the robotic insect being Brundlefly'd into a freakish hybrid. At first, everyone is focused on reversing the transformation. However, Tails soon discovers he likes the added superpowers this new form has given him. Unfortunately, being half-Beebot also links him with the hive, causing the fox to soon turn on his buddies and unleashes the imprisoned swarm. Sonic and the others have to reluctantly team up with Eggman to unravel this mess. 

Much to my surprise and delight, "You and I Bee-come One" is an episode of "Sonic Boom" inspired by a classic horror film. In 1957, George Langelaan published the short story, "The Fly." The premise, of a scientist inventing a teleporter and unwittingly fusing himself with a common housefly, caught the attention of 20th Century Fox exec Kurt Neumann. He quickly adapted it into a film starring David Hedison and genre icon Vincent Price. The combination of sci-fi gadgetry, a committed cast, a tragic romance approach to the material, and lightly surreal horror made the film a hit. Two sequels of debatable merit followed. In the mid-eighties, Canadian master David Cronenberg was hired to put his own spin on "The Fly." The 1986 remake was a greater success than the original. (And got its own questionable sequel.) Thanks to star-making performances from Jeff Goldblum and Geena Davis, a thoughtful script, and utterly grotesque special effects, this "Fly" is now regarded as a classic too. Despite the graphic body horror of the film, homages to it have repeatedly popped up in kids cartoons. Split second gags in Disney cartoons, an entire episode of "Invader Zim," a whole-ass reoccurring character on the first "Ninja Turtles" series, and countless shout-outs to its often repeated tagline are only a few examples. This puts "Sonic Boom" in good company, even if this is yet another reference kids in 2017 were unlikely to understand. 

"You and I Bee-come One" keeps the cocoon-like design of the telepods from Cronenberg's film but its combination is closer to the '57 original, meaning we don't see Tails shedding body parts or vomiting acidic digestive fluid on people. However, the psychological effect the transformation has on Tails isn't unlike Cronenberg's vision. Being half-robobee causes Tails to loose touch with his humanity. (Fox-ity?) At first, he simply finds the upgrades, like mechanical bug wings or laser zapping stingers, useful for superhero-ing. However, he soon loses the ability to emphasize with organic beings before plotting a full-scale BeeBot invasion of the village. This is illustrated by Tails hearing echoing cries of "Jooooin us!" in his mind. (Itself a shout-out to another eighties horror flick.) "Sonic Boom" naturally plays all of this for comedy but it is a fairly involving narrative. A hero turning against his pals via an upgrade in ability is classic comic book shenanigans. Meanwhile, Tails seeking to leave the alienating individuality of autonomous personhood behind in order to join the conformity of bee life is an existential crisis we can all relate to. I mean, who among us hasn't longed to discard the drudgery of personal freedom and become one with the hive? We've all been there, folks. 

Benoit Grenier doesn't exactly probe this concept for any deep reflections on the human and/or robot insect existence. Nor does he resolve the inconsistency of how all this gene-splicing works with a robotic bee. Instead of being turned into a fox/insect hybrid, Tails probably should have had metal parts inserted throughout his body, a fate closer to "Crash" than "The Fly" on the Cronenberg body horror scale. Truthfully, "You and I Bee-come One" is plottier than you might expect from "Sonic Boom." Eggman spending the weekend at a retreat for supervillains isn't the inciting incident. It incites the inciting incident, Tails getting bug-spliced. A few more dominos have to fall before we get to the dramatic crux of the episode, which is Tails unleashing the captured robots and Sonic being forced to align himself with his greatest foe. It all flows relatively smoothly, for being shoved into an eleven minute cartoon. 

However, you can tell Grenier had to rush the ending. Every time a BeeBot is smashed, it causes Tails physical pain. The heroes also have to sever his connection with the hive in order to subdue him. The solution to this problem is... For Team Sonic to destroy all the BeeBots, presumably causing Tails far more agony. Eggman cooking up a brainwave dampener or Tails getting lured into an area where the psychic link to the other bees is weakened or something would've been better. Or, better yet, Sonic reminding him of his bond with his friends long enough to break through the influence of the bee mind. Kids cartoons love that shit. That would have been a good contrast to a nightmare Tails had earlier, of Sonic and friends rejecting him, the hive mind seemingly playing on some insecurities the fox has. Instead, there's not enough time to craft a proper ending so the solution is more violence, with no concern for the physical toll that might have on Tails' body or brain. 

Not to mention the psychological effect. This episode airing so close to "Give Bees a Chance" makes the ending seem more callous. Amy happily participates in the massacre of the hive, despite forming a loving bond with a BeeBot not that long ago. This would be kind of like going on a mad puppy stomping spree after receiving a beloved new pet. In a more dramatic setting, Tails betraying his friends would also result in more storytelling opportunities. I know all of this wasn't his fault. It was the psychic influence of the swarm, of course. Still, everyone's trust in Tails being left a little shaken would've been a good follow-up, necessitating him having to earn it back. Or, perhaps, his pals are eager to move on but Tails still remembers his time being part of a group consciousness, changing him for the better or worse in various ways. "Boom" picked a disappointing episode to relax on the continuity. More could have been done here, even within the context of a ten minute long comedy show. 

I do think the laughs and the concept of the episode could have been melded together more smoothly, rather than grotesquely warped together via teleporter mishap. Nevertheless, I did laugh a few times. The running joke of Eggman being at a vacation resort for bad guys provides amusing cutaways, to the villain limbo-ing or in a conga line. There's some decent physical comedy, such as when Sonic face-plants on a frozen lake or Knuckles decides to take a direct route to enjoying some pie. Sonic ends up in a humiliating flower costume in the last act, which leads to a running gag that is mildly amusing. I do wish the dialogue was a little sharper. Only a bit from Sticks about hearing voices made me laugh. 

Also, it's kind of strange that "Sonic" cartoons can't stop turning Tails into a villain, if only for a single episode. I suppose it goes hand-in-hand with his super-inventor status. I won't say "You and I Bee-come One" disappointed me. How can I be let down by a "Fly"-inspired episode, especially when I didn't see it coming at all? Still, more could have been done with concept. Once again, I yearn for a long-running comic book spin-off that could develop ideas introduced as a joke in more thoughtful ways down the line. As it is now, I can only give this episode half of a positive score, which will surely displease the hive. Luckily, I own a beekeeper suit and a smoke gun, so those stupid bees won't be able to outsmart me. [6/10]

Sonic the Hedgehog Annual 2024

Sonic the Hedgehog Annual 2024

Publication Date: October 9th, 2024

As IDW's on-going “Sonic the Hedgehog” comic book is currently wrapped up in an unending story arc that I can't say I'm a big fan of, I found myself looking forward to this year's annual more than usual. In the past few years, the annual has been where the character-driven “Sonic” stories have truly been allowed to pop up. I suppose, due to the individual segments being fairly short, there's not much time for traditional action theatrics, forcing the writers to actually focus on fleshing out the cast members. Whatever the cause, it's a much-needed respite from the rumbling behemoth of plotlines that the current story has become. Let's not delay any longer and dive into the “Sonic the Hedgehog 2024 Annual.”

Three stories are contained within, two shorter ones and a longer one. Ian Flynn's “Hero's Calling” must take place after Surge and Kit decided to join the Restoration as undercover agents but before everyone got caught up in hoverboard racing. It begins with the two stopping a runaway trolley train from squishing a parade of Chao and I guess the people inside too. A minor comment from one of the rescued people about how Surge still isn't as fast as Sonic causes her to reflect on what motivates her. This, unwittingly, changes Kit's sense of himself as well. “For My Destiny” by Iasmin Omar Ata involves Knuckles chilling on Angel Island, staring at the Master Emerald. This creates a vision of sorts, where he considers his fate as Guardian and his connections with his friends. Who then show up, following a crash landing in the Tornado. “Shattered Diamonds,” from Gigi Dutreix, takes place around the Eggperial City arc, when Tangle, Whisper, and Lanolin where waiting for Sonic and Tails to show up. Mimic lurks in the shadows, planning to pick Whisper off once and for all, as he reflects thinks back on his past and how he met the quiet sniper.

The previous IDW annuals have all had themes connecting their different stories, I suppose. 2022's installment was about unlikely partnerships. 2020's annual focused on side characters reacting to the Metal Virus outbreak, while 2019's annual was connected by the idea of friendship. 2024's annual delves into a deeper theme than I expected. Essentially, it's about the way different characters negotiate with their own loneliness and how that keeps them going. Surge lets go of her resentment of the world in a very Surge-like manner, while Kit gives us an idea of how far he's willing to go to make sure he's never separated from Surge. Knuckles finds himself being thankful for the bonds he has and the destiny that has brought him to this life. Finally, Mimic's story sees the octopus grappling with a need to discard other people's validation and connection. He wants to be so strong that he doesn't need anyone and Whisper is the last reminder of that. For a kid's comic published mostly to remind people to go out and buy video games, this is surprisingly deep stuff.

I don't know if Flynn's story did this intentionally or not but it shows Surge growing as a character in a way that is so uniquely her. She has come to the grim realization that Starline was right about something, that the world is trapped in a cycle of Sonic and Eggman fighting for control. Surge previously wanted to burn that all down but now she sees the non-superpowered citizens of the planet as so inept and helpless, that she can't hate them anymore. She calls them “morons” and says “they can't do anything.” Keep in this mind, this happens right before she declares a lingering a desire to crush Sonic while also looking sadly out the window and concluding that everyone else in the world aren't “bad.”

What is happening here is the same development the comic has been building towards all year: Surge is letting go of the pain that forged her. She's letting go of her desire to be hated because it's better than being nothing. She is realizing her own worth, coming to understand that she deserves love. The tenrec with an attitude can't simply say that though. As introspective as Surge obviously is, she's too proud to let a chink in her bad-ass persona show. She has to find a way to angrily declare that she doesn't hate everyone anymore and wants to be praised by them. When looked at from this angle, it's actually quite a funny story. Surge is slowly developing into a fully formed, kind person but she can't, like, act that way because it would mess with her bad bitch status. She has to declare herself superior to all the fumbling idiot masses to disguise the fact that she actually wants to protect them out of the goodness of her heart.

What of Kit though? Surge has been able to break through the psychological conditioning Starline programmed into her. Her sidekick, on the other hand, hasn't been able to do that. His only desire in life is be with Surge and keep her happy. He remains her biggest fan and desperate, needy simp. When Surge presents the possibility that the world can exist without Eggman, it causes the fennec to have a crisis. If there's no Eggman, there's no threat for Surge to challenge, and no reason for people to praise her. And if there's no reason for Surge to be praised, there's no reason for Kit to be around. In his head, he quickly concocts a scheme to engineer threats for Surge to grapple with, in order to maintain his own purpose in life.

It's a far more duplicitous moment than we are used to seeing from Kit. It's also the only part of an otherwise good story that makes me pause. The earlier scenes, where the two are interacting, show Ian Flynn's strength. He has a clear grasp on these two and watching them bounce off one another is delightful. The panel where Kit asks what's wrong with Surge before becoming fearful that she's mad at him is hilarious and sad. Hilarious because it's such a cute, mundane discussion and sad because it shows how totally and completely Kit's self-worth depends on Surge needing him. I'm not entirely sure how the little guy makes the leap from “if people aren't praising Surge, she won't need me... Therefore I must become death, the destroy of worlds.” Feels like we, the reader, missed a step.

Unfortunately, I think I know why these handful of panels are inserted into this story. “Hero's Calling” ends with a promise that its story will continue in issue 75 of IDW's main “Sonic” book. The second story has a similar cliffhanger, promising readers that they'll discover why Sonic, Tails, and Amy had to crash land on Angel Island in issue 80. One of the unfortunate truths you have to swallow as a comic book fan is that stories are rarely allowed to end. New issues must always be forthcoming. Superman must always have a reason to fight Lex Luthor. Batman must always have something to protect Gotham from. In other words, writers crafting a satisfying story is often hampered by another need: To set up the next thing down the line. Ian Flynn is a comic industry veteran at this point. He knows what he's doing. Which is why a story that otherwise might have been about Surge slowly realizing she doesn't need to be a villain has to pause to set up the idea that, somewhere down the line, Kit will become a greater threat. It's nice that this idea is based upon his psychological hang-ups and massive neediness. It also would've been nice if “Hero's Calling” didn't feel the need to remind us that the show must go on, even to the detriment of telling a proper tale.

There's something awkward about the second story too, that I couldn't help but notice. This is Iasmin Omar Ata's second IDW “Sonic” credit, after writing the “Winter Jam” story. “For My Destiny” is this comic book, once again, grappling with an obnoxious Sega mandate that they seemed legal-bound to follow: Knuckles can't spend too much time away from the Master Emerald. The echidna has to toil away the majority of his life looking at a big green rock and Sega isn't interested in hearing justifications for why he might want to do something else. This has led to multiple awkward moments in the comic, where the reader ends up asking “Hey, why isn't Knuckles helping his friends out during this crazy, difficult time?” I guess he can't build a wall around the Shrine or have Tails create some robots to guard it or whatever. No, no, Knuckles must always be on Angel Island.

Ata has been tasked with the thankless job of cooking up a reason why Knuckles willingly waste his entire life standing next to the Master Emerald. Ultimately, he comes to the conclusion that this is his destiny and every good thing he had in his life – his friendships, the adventures he's had – are because of his duty as guardian of the Master Emerald. Every minute spent standing guard has been worth it, he seems to conclude. And that's bullshit, right? Since the Master Emerald seems to manifest a vision quest for the echidna when he's having some doubts about his role in life, it truly feels like an abusive parent saying "Think of how much worse you'd be without me!!!" If Knuckles can be said to have a "relationship" with the Master Emerald – which this story certainly implies – any therapist would classify it as toxic. This is "The Giving Tree" except Knuckles is the tree. Yes, Knuckles has met all his friends because of his job but... Wouldn't a life with supportive parents and normal relationship have been better, instead of carrying out an ancient destiny set in motion eons before he was born? Having the echidna take what he's been given and say "Thank you, sir, can I have another" feels colossally unfair to the guy. 

I've had more than my share of bad things to say about Ken Penders' "Knuckles" opus. Still, his version of the character – conflicted about his role in life, essentially a victim of a centuries long conspiracy to keep him isolated and in the dark – feels a lot more realistic to me than a Knuckles totally fine with idling away his teenage years glaring at the area around a big ass jewel. (Not that Ken intentionally wrote it that way – his point was "emotionally distant parents that manipulate every facet of your life are doing the best they can" – but that's how it came off.) Credit where it's due: I think Ata does a decent job justifying what continues to be an unreasonable demand from the comic's corporate overlords. All but literally shackling Knuckles to the Master Emerald limits his growth as a character and perpetually keeps a fan favorite on the sidelines. At least this story delves into how he feels about what is obviously a shitty deal. That the conclusion feels false is a result of IDW being forced into a corner over how they can use Knuckles. The echidna must say "this is fine" or else acknowledge that what he's doing makes no fucking sense. Challenging the status quo isn't something IDW "Sonic" is interested in doing and may, in fact, be explicitly forbidden from doing so.

Maybe I'm projecting here but, unavoidably, it seems that Ata agrees that this is bullshit. That's why, in the last third, "For My Destiny" totally shifts direction. Sonic, Tails, and Amy show up on the island as Knux is feeling sentimental. The story concludes with the four spending time together, bantering, simply hanging out. It's nice! Seeing four old friends interact so easily, so casually, is overwhelmingly pleasant enough that you totally forget how the first half of the story makes no sense. Further more, this story feels like a deliberate tease to Sonic/Knuckles shippers. The echidna says he's so grateful to have the Emerald in his life, not noticing Sonic is there. The hedgehog spends the next six panels teasing him. Knuckles basically says "I love you," Sonic says "haha ur so ghey," and Knuckles screams back "NO I'M NOT!" This interaction is, it goes without saying, the gayest conversation two men can have. And I think that's beautiful. What is a man-on-man friendship without an ever-present homoerotic tension? 

The third story is by far the best here and gives us something the series hadn't done before: A deep dive into Mimic's personality. We learned that he wanted to be an actor, found his abilities to copy someone weren't appreciated in the entertainment industry, but was much more valuable during a war. We discover he went from team to team, always abandoning or betraying them eventually. When he met the Diamond Cutters, he found a family that actually accepted him for who he is... Which terrified him. Up until this point, Mimic has been written as a sociopath incapable of empathy. It's a topic of great debate in the psychological community but I personally believe, to paraphrase the late great Dr. Lecter, monsters are made, not born. Mimic had a gift that he craved validation for but it was rejected. This turned him into someone who pushed others aside before they had a chance to hurt him. He then made this callousness the cornerstone of his personality. He says it himself: "Everyone has a little emptiness inside." This is Mimic justifying his own bad behavior. "I'm not a psycho! Everybody is like this and I'm the only one honest about it!" 

Meeting the Diamond Cutters, being accepted into a group and a family, makes him feel empathy, connection, brotherhood. The emotions he promised himself never to embrace, as it only leads to getting hurt. That's the real reason he killed his teammates. Not because he's an utterly cold monster at heart but because he made himself one to protect a helplessly fragile soul. He is evil because of what he does, not who he is. The first word balloon in this story says "Who are you?" We know who Mimic is now: He's sad. He's lonely. He's rejected. He's hurt. And he built a persona of utter selfishness to protect himself from all that. Without downplaying Mimic's status as a brutally effective villain, "Shattered Diamonds" manages to make his character a whole lot deeper and, yes, sympathetic. 

This story is extremely valuable for another reason too. It gives us a look at what Whisper was like before she got traumatized. Apparently, she was a lot like Tangle. She is bright-eyed, excited, friendly, and outgoing. Quite a difference from the muted and shy character we've grown to love. Perhaps the difference is too extreme. However, I do think such a prominent contrast is worthwhile. It draws attention to how much Whisper has changed, how much the loss of her teammates effected her and still effect her. It is also a reflection of Mimic. The octopus lost his team and it caused him to recommit to the idea of being a heartless killer who doesn't need anybody. Whisper loss her team and became emotionally walled-off too. She didn't close her heart off from love, from acceptance, from companionship and the always unavoidable possibility that it might lead to heartbreak. It shows the difference between the two, between engaging with the world with total cynicism versus operating with love and kindness. It suggests, perhaps, maybe Mimic is redeemable too, as unlikely as that is. 

The story doesn't only flesh out Mimic and Whisper though. The original Diamond Cutters were properly introduced in the third issue of the "Tangle & Whisper" mini-series. That book was published in September 2019. In the time since then, the characters have loomed large over Whisper without having that many additional appearances. People far more well-read in video games tell me that the Diamond Cutters are a reference to "Metal Gear Solid" and existed more-or-less to be nothing but an in-joke. Enough time has passed to prove that fans genuinely are interested in these guys. This story gives us some more time with Smithy, Slinger, and Claire Voyance. We see Smithy's warmth and generosity, Slinger's sarcasm and playfulness, and Claire's affection for her friends. In any other setting, it would be silly to think of a group of mercenaries as this lovable gang. In the world of "Sonic," they are sniping robots and not guerillas, so it's easier to buy. Finally making these guys more alive makes what they meant to Whisper all the more meaningful. 

It's easy to take for granted how good these books look now. However, the 2024 Annual has some especially nice art. Thomas Rothlisberger has to draw Surge and Kit talking in a room, not the most exciting possibility. Kit looks a little off in a few panels, perhaps because of this. Matt Froese does the first half of "Shattered Diamonds" and his cartoony style takes a minute to adapt too. It still results in some beautiful panels, such as when Mimic in the guide of a Egg Pawn reflects on his emptiness, painted as a black and white shape surrounded by red screaming ghosts in a black void. Mauro Fonseca gets some prime visuals in the second. The series of panels devoted to Mimic stepping into a lake and washing away his feelings are very intimate and personal. Followed by a cool page showing the shattering alliances as a series of broken masks. Cool. The middle story, drawn by Adam Bryce Thomas, simply looks gorgeous. When Knuckles first steps into the vision provided by the Master Emerald, we get a splash page that easily could've been a Spaz cover back in the Archie days, right down to the way Knuckles holds himself. I have missed "Sonic" comics looking like that. It must always be said that Thomas makes all the characters look utterly cute bright-eyed but Rouge looks especially adorable. 

I have my qualms about the first two stories while still thinking they are good. The third story might be one of the best "Sonic" stories IDW has published. If nothing else, I genuinely appreciate a totally character-focused collection of tales like this. I don't want the comic to be like this all the time but I would definitely approve it if it was like this more often. I don't object to action scenes in my "Sonic" books. I like a good action sequence as much as the next guy! However, action means a lot more if you're invested in everyone. Zeroing in on what maybe makes these guys tick causes all the punching, fighting, exploding, and gotta-go-fast-ing mean much more. The pressure of writing a perpetually on-going comic book that involves licensed characters, beholden to certain guidelines, continues to be frustrating. Art can still emerge in these conditions, as "Shattered Diamonds" prove. I am thus forced to give the 2024 Annual a very high recommendation. [8/10]

Sonic Boom, Episode 2.46: Lair on Lockdown

Sonic Boom, Episode 2.46: Lair on Lockdown

Original Air Date: October 7th, 2017

Having been produced in 2016, when the term "lockdown" had slightly different connotations than it does post-COVID, "Lair on Lockdown" begins with Team Sonic rushing into Eggman's base, incensed at his latest scheme: A ticketing website full of bogus processing fees. (Another reference that has changed somewhat more recently.) During the following fight, Eggman's control panel is pierced with some shrapnel. This activates lockdown protocol, the characters sorted into different rooms that are then sealed shut. Now, these very different personalities have to work together if they hope to escape... Which is slightly more urgent, since there's a pile of toxic waste in the basement about to explode too. 

"Lair on Lockdown" is "Sonic Boom's" take on a well-trotted piece of television lore. That would be the "bottle episode." This is an episode of a series in which a limited number of characters are trapped in a single location for most of the runtime. It is designed to be an episode that can be produced quickly and cheaply, usually to make up for another episode going over-budget or other gaps in funds. Wikipedia tells me the term was coined by "The Outer Limits" creator Leslie Stevens, because the format could be pulled from a bottle like a genie. I always assumed the name referred to the single location being like trapping the cast in a bottle. (Which, funnily enough, is a good description of an episode of "Outer Limits" rival, "The Twilight Zone.") While less despised than that other cash-saving measure common on TV – the clip show – the bottle episode has become an easily recognized trope. Due to this, many examples of this type of story put a deliberately meta riff on the idea. Such as "Community's" hilarious evisceration or one-season wonder "That's My Bush!," which is where I first heard the term explicitly identified. The idea is less common in animation – seeing as how cartoons don't have sets – but it makes sense for a CGI series like "Boom," as a bottle episode would mean few new designs or elements to render. 

Bottle episodes have been criticized for being hacky and cheap but, at the same time, the premise has also become something of a fan favorite. Shows like "Star Trek: The Next Generation" or "Friends" have often been praised for their bottle episodes. The set-up allows the writers to narrow their focus, sometimes resulting in a smaller scale drama that can give the actors a chance to shine or dig deeper into the personalities of the characters. The specific perimeters of "Lair on Lockdown" has another benefit of the bottle episode in mind: Throwing together two characters that otherwise don't interact much. Here, we have Sonic and Cubot paired up in the control room, Tails and Amy in the basement, Knuckles and Eggman in a storage area, and Sticks and Orbot shoved into a lobby with a visible A/C vent. Constraining these duos in a tight location sharply contrasts their attributes and forces them to put aside their differences and work together to escape. 

As self-aware as "Sonic Boom" is, you'd expect the show to acknowledge the bottle episode idea and subvert it accordingly. Surprisingly, "Lair on Lockdown" is a relatively straight execution of the concept. It's not a bad one either. Of the various combos, Sticks and Orbot are by far the funniest. Sticks' paranoid nature has her distrustful of all robots so forcing her to work with Orbot – a prissy droid especially focused on helping others – makes for a lot of sharp comedy. A sequence where Sticks reacts to every suggestion Orbot has with enraged accusations made me chuckle healthily. Teaming up Eggman, rather conceited about his own intelligence, and Knuckles, the show's resident lunkhead, has its benefits as well. Eggman continuously mispronouncing Knuckles' name is a running gag that gets an especially good workout here. Eggman's melancholy side also bounces nicely off Knuckles' constant state of blissful ignorance. 

Some of the other pairings aren't quite as well realized. Sonic getting stuck with Cubot leads to some good gags, based on the robot's tendency to misunderstand simple ideas and Sonic's difficulty navigating Eggman's control panel. However, these two have the most plot heavy segment of the episode, meaning there aren't as many opportunities for them to banter together. Tails and Amy break the pattern of one of our heroes getting stuck with one of their adversaries. These two are already friends, so there's less tension in locking them into a room together. (I guess the basic math of the two teams made a pairing like that inevitable.) That's probably why those two are the duo that discover the barrels of toxic waste, which will explode if they aren't kept constantly cool. That's a problem when Sticks shuts off the A/C so her and Orbot can John McClane around in the ventilation shafts. 

As contrived as that particular plot point is, I rather like it. Bottle episodes usually play off two people locked in a location overnight or something similar. Time is the primary factor keeping them stuck here. I expected "Lair on Lockdown" to do something similar, since it's noted early on that the quarantine period ends after 48 hours. Introducing the idea of the nuclear waste about to burst adds a twist, making the need to escape far more urgent. If this show wasn't a comedy, that ideally would've been played for suspense. Instead, any sense of tension is undermined by the jokes. The best joke of which is Tails and Amy attempting to keep the barrels of Mootonium cool manually. However, since "Lair on Lockdown" basically fuses four separate "bottles" together, creating a plot that links all these isolated duos is a smart solution. The segregated pairings have to communicate through Morse code to help each other out, providing a dramatic throughline across the four different rooms. 

All of this makes "Lair on Lockdown" a fairly well-done example of a commonly utilized premise. My favorite aspect to emerge out of this one is another look at Eggman's various vulnerabilities. The storage room contains artifacts from past failures of his, such as a tin can robot from "Dr. Eggman's Tomato Sauce" or Swifty the Shrew's head from "Blue with Envy." (The rule of three dictates that there be a third object, which turns out to be a dinosaur egg, referencing an episode that doesn't actually exist. A good joke that is the closet this script comes to winking at the fourth wall.) Being surrounded by reminders of previous defeats puts Eggman into a funk. His mood shifts slightly when Knuckles uncovers Zippie, the very first robot Eggman built. The small, beeping, wheeled device shows a simple, child-like spirit. That reminds Eggman of why he started building machines in the first place, renewing his spirit a little bit. Zippie is also there to comfort him at the end, after his base gets blown up. Though that's not exactly an uncommon occurrence on this show, so I don't know why it gets Eggman so down. We also find out that the doctor's primary password is "chili dogs," pointing towards what Cubot refers to as Eggman seeking Sonic's approval. Once again, the image of Eggman as a neurotic, lonely kid desperate to be accepted and praised emerges. 

"Lair on Lockdown" goes to show that, no matter how often "Sonic Boom" would poke at its own status as a formulaic TV show, it could still put some of those formulas to good use. Françoise Gralewski's script probably could've been a little funnier or deeper. However, considering this show is always stuck in a bottle known as the eleven minute runtime, I think he did a good job. Now I want to know how this format would've gone with other "Sonic" shows. What would have happened if Sally and Snively got stuck in an elevator or a sinking submarine or something? What sexy shenanigans would result from Knuckles and Rouge being trapped in a cave-in together? Can Sonic and Metal Sonic put aside their differences and figure out to escape a locked PortaPotty? Oh no, I'm writing fanfiction again. Better wrap this review up before I'm tempted to sign up for an AO3 account... [7/10]

Sonic Boom, Episode 2.45: Three Minutes or Less

Sonic Boom, Episode 2.45: Three Minutes or Less

Original Air Date: September 30th, 2017

"Three Minutes or Less" begins with Sonic and his friends doing exactly what fans of this fast-paced, action franchise want to see: Sitting around and watching TV. After seeing an ad promising that Meh Burger now delivers, promising the meal free of charge if it takes longer than thirty minutes to arrive, the gang orders some food. Their soggy burgers show up three hours later. Incensed, Sonic complains to the local store, pointing out that he could deliver food in three minutes or less. Meh Burger Corporate takes him up on that bet and now Sonic is zooming around the island, delivering take-out with ease. When Eggman sees his rival having such success with a new venture, he makes it his new mission to ruin Sonic's perfect delivery record and get some free fast food. 

By the time "Three Minutes or Less" aired in September of 2017 – a week later than expected due to some production fuck-up – food delivery apps like GrubHub, UberEats, and Postmates were already commonplace. It would not shock me if the genesis of this episode was writer Freddie Gutierrez seeing the words "DoorDash," being reminded of Sonic's Spin Dash, and going from there. These services were only starting to become culturally ubiquitous in the late 2010s but they were already notorious for the mistreatment of their employees. Workers have been screwed out of tips, treated as "independent contractors," and basically punished anytime they didn't act like perfectly servile robots. It was evident extremely early on that turning random folks into freelance food delivery drivers, and allowing customers to give them crushing judgment via their phones, was going to end poorly for everyone except the Silicon Valley venture capitalists that own the billion dollar brand. Yes, the "gig economy" was recognized as such a ripoff for workers that, seven whole years ago, a children's cartoon was already making fun of them. 

It's entirely possible all of this was a coincidence. Food delivery apps are never referenced in "Three Minutes or Less." Meh Burger's delivery system seems to function like your typical pizza place or Chinese takeout restaurant. Everyone in Hedgehog Village had cellphones a few episodes ago in "Chain Letter" but nobody has them here. Sonic doesn't agree to be paid for his work, instead receiving chili dogs as compensation. If DoorDash and the like were the targets of this episode, one would expect a joke about Eggman trying to ruin the hedgehog's five star rating or whatever. I can't get the idea out of my head though, especially in light of several highly critical moments towards fast food culture. Dunking on McDonald's et al and the millionaires that run the company is common practice for this show. A line from Dave asking why Sonic would wear his uniform with pride or the depiction of the Meh Burger manager as extremely sketchy are deliberate jabs at this particular strain of capitalism. Maybe I'm overthinking it and the premise here is simply "What if Sonic was a delivery guy?" The cultural moments seem to line up though.

An episode about Sonic grappling with the realities of the gig economy probably would've been quite funny. It's a classic "Boom" set-up, sticking our super-fast hero in a crushingly mundane job. The hedgehog does grapple with some of the common difficulties of such a job, such as picky customers, traffic hampering speedy delivery, and people generally being huge weirdos around delivery guys. Sonic realizing that this job isn't as easy as it seems would be a decent foundation for a script. "Three Minutes or Less" doesn't go in that direction. Instead, Sonic is extremely good at this job. He continuously upholds the promise of getting orders to people in fewer than three minutes. Customers are always satisfied and always give him fat tips. He also doesn't seem to mind being paid solely in chili-slathered meat tubes. Within the fantasy constraints of this series, in a community without an infrastructure for cars, I suppose it makes sense that Sonic would do very well in such a position. If only all of us lowly food delivery folks had superspeed!

Instead, the joke quickly changes gear from the absurdity of Sonic in such a commonplace position to Eggman going out of his way to ruin his enemy's reputation. This is another extrapolation of the series' other running joke, that Eggman is motivated by the pettiest of goals. He doesn't want to destroy the town or take over the world. He only wants to make Sonic break his promise, to defeat the hedgehog at something. This results in Eggman rallying his forces in evermore elaborate ways. He pesters Sonic to bring him more stuff, then lays out Badniks throughout the city, then starts capturing citizens, tries to overwhelm him with multiple orders, and finally surrounds his base with as many of his oversized sub-bosses as possible. The punchline is that Sonic bests each challenge, usually with ease, repeatedly defeating Eggman until his spirit is crushed. Because of cheeseburgers! It's a very absurd scenario that keeps getting weirder and sillier as it goes on. The early episodes of "Sonic X" played with this as well, the idea of Sonic as an ineffable straight man that blows through every thing Eggman throws at him. Placing such a set-up within the context of the villain trying to get free food is even funnier. (Though the scene where Sonic brutally murders the docile, peaceful Cowbot was unnecessary. Justice for Cowbot!) 

The result is a very funny installment. The gags are sturdy and come frequently, such as Sonic and Knuckles wrestling in different ways while they wait for their order. The structure of the episode boils down to placing Sonic in various weird set-ups, coming to people's door and having to grumble his way through different interactions. Some of these are easy to foresee, such as Old Monkey being a doddering elder primate or the Gogobas doing exactly what you expect the Gogobas to do. Other moments are more unexpected. Sonic brings an order to Eggman's bunker and Cubot, from the other side of the door, recreates Cheech and Chong's "Dave's not here, man" bit. Not a reference I expected from a children's cartoon in 2017! (And clearly one that went over the heads of the intended audience, as no notice is made of it on the Sonic Wiki trivia section.) 

By far the funniest sequence involves Sonic encountering Amy Rose at the horniest we've seen her. She orders a meal for two, inviting Sonic inside for "a break for work." She's laid out a nice tablecloth and candles. She answers the door, giggling and leaning against it in a submissive posture. She looks back with some real bedroom eyes after inviting him in. And she's really disappointed when the romantic gesture goes right over Sonic's head. Considering "Boom" Amy usually regards Sonic with annoyed tolerance, I simply did not expect her to so blatantly come on to him. Is this scene a spoof of the classic porn trope of the lonely housewife enticing the pizza boy into her cabana? That would be a shocking adults-only joke for this program to pull It wouldn't be the first time either. That would also explain why Sonic gets the hell out of there, not because he's clueless but because he's uncomfortable about what Amy clearly has planned. "Boom" has constantly gone back and forth over whether any romantic tension exists between these two. My theory is that they have a fuck-buddy situation on the downlow. This scene suggest that this is certainly what Amy seems to want, even if Sonic has no idea how to approach it. Is the hedgehog a virgin who is scared of the ladies? Does Amy have some sort of terrifyingly elaborate fetish that Sonic can't handle? What freaky shit goes down on this island when nobody is looking? 

But enough speculating about the sex lives of cartoon characters from a children's show. Ya know what else I've been noticing about "Sonic Boom" lately? They sure do make a lot of TV on this island. This episode includes three quick gags based around off-screen television programming. At the start, Sonic and friends are watching some "CSI" style forensic investigation show about marsupials. Later, Eggman prepares to view "Hedgehog Abbey." In-between is a quick news announcement that the Bike Chain Bandit is at large again. This comes on the heels of the last episode, that showed Vector the Crocodile being a widely recognized reality star and Justin Beaver getting a gig on a "American Idol/The Voice" competition show. I know a talk show host is a reoccurring character in this show, so TV shows within the TV show have always been a part of "Boom." There were jokes about reality programing all the way in season one. Yet it's a gag "Boom" has been leaning on a lot. It's sort of weird that such a tiny village on such a small island has a complex entertainment industry of its own. Do these programs broadcast to other corners of the "Boom" world? Or they produced only for the insular community we see on this show? Is Comedy Chimp a celebrity everywhere or only on South Sea Island? We'll never know and all we can do is horribly speculate about what the rest of this planet looks like. Anyway, this is a pretty funny episode. It takes a set-up and runs with it to unexpected places. [7/10]

Sonic Boom, Episode 2.44: Vector Detector

Sonic Boom, Episode 2.44: Vector Detector

Original Air Date: September 9th, 2017

In retrospect, it's funny how much effort the "Sonic Boom" writers invested in building up the show's supporting cast in the second season. "Sonic the Hedgehog," as a franchise, is rather notorious for the ten thousand characters it has. Why spend so much time on Dave the Intern when you could have devoted an episode to beloved characters like Blaze or Silver? Hardcore fans ask questions like this all the time but the answer is obvious. Show runners and writers naturally want to develop their own world. Writers tend to make stuff their own. Creatives create. Speaking as a fan and a pretentious writer guy, I understand both perspectives. When you are banging away at a keyboard, cranking out a story, it's only natural that you're going to get invested in the deep, tragic backstory of Wade Whipple. At the same time, it does feel like a bit of a waste to have access to the vast library of "Sonic the Hedgehog" lore and not utilize more of it. When you are telling a story in an established universe, is it better to make up a new guy, to fit the needs of the plot you're writing, or should you take a pre-existing character and twist them to feed your narrative? As a fan, is it more important that the thing you like gets referenced or that it is portrayed in a way that's faithful to what made you love it in the first place? These are debates people have been having about adaptations since the beginning of human civilization. 

In other words: Does Vector the Crocodile appearing in an episode of "Sonic Boom" matter more to you than the version of Vector the Crocodile you specifically love showing up at all? It's hard to say how much the "Boom" writers grappled with these questions. Considering the show would rather throw in another joke at Old Monkey or Mayor Fink's expense than reference anything from the "Sonic" video games, I doubt it was on their minds much at all. However, rarely, the show would grab someone from established "Sonic" lore to fill a role. Considering Shadow only showed up in a season finale or Metal Sonic randomly appeared in a middling installment, this can feel like a cynical attempt to build hype. Was "Vector Detector" written because ratings were sagging and execs knew tossing in a Sega character would create buzz? Or did Reid Harrison genuinely want to use this crocodile guy, because he's a fan or he knew Vector fit the role in the story he was making? I guess we'll never know. Really, it doesn't matter. None of this matters. 

Nihilism aside, let's talk about the actual episode. Much like that one issue of the "Boom" comic book, "Vector Detector" begins with Amy noticing her beloved hammer is missing. Feeling existential angst without her trademark accessory, Amy hires a private detective to recover her beloved mallet. Vector the Crocodile, star of a reality TV show dedicated to following his exploits, is on the case. Sonic, eager to prove his own skills as a crime solver, tags along on the investigation. Together, the two follow a series of clues, discarding false leads and dead ends, that lead to the identity of the hammer thief. 

Long time readers of this blog will know that I have a complicated history with Vector the Crocodile. For years, with only one appearance in a launch title for a Genesis add-on a total of six people bought, Vector was mostly defined by his appearances in the Archie "Sonic" and "Knuckles" comics. There, Ken Penders wrote him largely as an obnoxious dumb-ass who existed to be mad at Knuckles' girlfriend – because he was in love with him??? – and spout embarrassing white guy attempts at hip-hop slang. Years later, Sega would dust the reptile off and zero in on a, up to then, downplayed part of his personality: His status as a detective. Naturally, this revamped version of Vector reached a far wider audience than the obscure Archie take. Which is probably for the best, as Knuckles really didn't need a token black friend yelling "Dayum!" or "That is whack!" 

Relics of Vector's past as a reductive stereotype still linger, such as his gold chain and headphones, but most "Sonic" media has gone all in with the detective thing. That's what "Sonic Boom" does. Their version of Vector peppers his dialogue with hard-boiled P.I. phrases. Palooka, vic, jamoke, and eighty-sixed are in his vocabulary. He calls Amy a "skirt," says someone "copped" her hammer, and accused the criminal of being a "mug." I always enjoy hearing ridiculous, old-timey slang tossed into a contemporary setting with little to no explanation. Harrison's smartly doesn't draw any attention to Vector's bizarre way of speech. However, I think more humor could've been derived from the contrast between the way he looks and sounds and his dialogue. "Boom" designers dropped the headphones and threw a leather jacket over top the standard Sega version. Keith Silverstein has been the voice of Vector since 2010, giving the crocodile a big, exaggerated sound that I've never thought fit him. (In my brain, he sounds like Tracy Morgan.) If "Boom" wanted to play into the detective thing, they should've had Vector in a fedora and trench coat, giving him a Brooklyn accent or something. Or else made a joke of why he sounds like that when he's dressed like a deejay. 

Special Guest Star Vector the Crocodile may be at the center of the story but "Sonic Boom" is still firmly entrenched with its own cast. Comedy Chimp, Wolf T. Sidekick, and Justin Beaver are all potential suspects in the hammer-napping. Fastidious Beaver has a cameo, so on and so forth. By now, "Boom" has firmly established its group of background players. That everyone in this village is always so mean-spirited and reactionary makes any of them a potential suspect. The mystery itself is not that hard to untangle. However, the trail of clues Sonic and Vector follow goes down enough wrong turns to keep me guessing for a little bit. The script copies the structure of a detective story enough to keep me intrigued throughout. This leads to some decently silly parodies of detective movie tropes, such as Vector absurdly noticing some clues that Sonic didn't see right before him, both of them playing bad cop with Dave, and a typically self-aware riff on stake-out scenes. 

Weirdly, the episode doesn't commit one hundred percent to the hard-boiled detective premise. Instead of merely being a private investigator, Vector is the star of a reality show where a camera crew follows him around as he unravels mysteries. It looks like a cross between "COPS" and "Dog the Bounty Hunter" or something but features cheesy scene transition, more akin to a sketch show from the eighties. I expected this to escalate into a proper parody of reality television, a well this show has returned to at least twice before. Instead, it's a plot point that never goes anywhere. Vector is followed around by a camera crew and that never becomes part of the story. I kept expecting a reveal that the producer or Vector were planting evidence, to make a mundane story more exciting. Or that he stole Amy's hammer in the first place, in order to necessitate being hired. Something like that kind of happens but Vector is unconnected to it and the crime has no relation to the TV show element. Definitely strikes me as a bit of a missed opportunity. 

The episode could have ran with its ideas a little more but "Vector Detector" still made me reliably chuckle. This is the first episode Reid Harrison has scripted in a while. As was the style in his season one episode, this one is packed full of jokes and sight gags. Some are self-aware in nature. Such as Amy and Knuckles obliquely commenting on how "Sonic" characters are defined by a central gimmick. Or Tails commenting on how Sonic escalated a fight with Eggman. The mad doctor, showing up for one scene of robot smashing, is a nicely irrelevant joke. As you expect from Reid, any dead space in the story is filled with tossed-off jokes. The best of which is the town cop telling a crowd that "there's nothing to see here" before noticing the crime scene and changing his mind. Or, upon seeing Justin and Fastidious interacting, Sonic deadpan suggesting that some sort of beaver conspiracy is afoot. "Boom's" silliness insists upon itself sometimes – and does so here, in a moment involving a pie eating contest – but I like the way that Harrison's one-liners casually zip by. 

I did find myself wishing Amy played a bigger role in this story. She's front and center in the opening scenes. The first moment is an amusing sequence of her greeting all the inanimate objects in her house in an overly sunshiny manner. During the fight with Eggman, she forgets she's not holding her hammer and becomes despondent, depressed without her favorite weapon. As soon as Vector enters the story, the perspective shifts totally to Sonic and the crocodile. However, Amy being confused and weepy simply because she's without her hammer could have led to way more jokes of its own. Then again, as I pointed out earlier, one of the comics featured a similar story so perhaps there was a fear of stepping on another writer's toes. Hearing Cindy Robinson act out such a scenario might have been worth it though. 

Airing so late into "Sonic Boom's" run, "Vector Detector" is naturally the character's only meaningful appearance on the show. If "Boom" had gotten a third season, I wonder if the other Chaotix might have appeared? Cartoon Network screwing this show truly robbed us of a chance to see how much speed tape the "Boom" versions of Espio and Charmy might've worn. Or at least we could have learned why this version of the crocodile has a compass tattoo on his bicep. Anyway, decent episode, even if some of its ideas are better realized than others. [7/10]

Sonic Boom, Episode 2.43: Chain Letter

Sonic Boom, Episode 2.43: Chain Letter

Original Air Date: September 2nd, 2017

The title of the ninety-fifth episode of "Sonic Boom" had me hoping it would be about Sonic and friends getting sent a letter about the ghost of a dead girl who will haunt them unless they pass it along to seven friends. Instead, the titular "Chain Letter" is simply the kicking-off point to the plot. When Eggman receives such a message on social media platform FriendSpace, he's remiss to realize he lacks the proper amount of friends to forward the bad-luck-causing letter to. This sees the villain physically going around Hedgehog Village and begging people to become his fake internet friends. He goes so far as asking Sonic and the other heroes to add him on FriendSpace. When the villain proves so annoying, bombarding the hedgehog with notifications and stale memes, Sonic un-"friends" him. This is such a crushing blow to Eggman's ego that he invents a brand new social media platform called Scrambler, designed with the sole purpose of allowing everyone to use it except Sonic. When Scrambler actually becomes extremely popular, our blue hero is annoyed by his exclusion from the superstar app. 

Internet culture moves extremely fast. What is trending on Twitter or Instagram today will be utterly forgotten in a week or two. Since making television and movies – to say nothing of animation – is a crushingly slow process in comparison, big budget shows and films can find themselves woefully behind the tide by the time they become available to the public. In its first season, "Sonic Boom" was still cracking jokes about Justin Bieber as if he was chubby-cheeked child star when he was, in fact, a grizzled 22 year old. Which is to say: This show taking on social media was always going to be a disaster full of hopelessly out-of-date references and antiquated pop culture callbacks. 

You can see this immediately. The social media platform at the center of the story is called FriendSpace, which seems to be largely inspired by Myspace and Friendster, both of which were awash in chain letters and other bullshit. Those are such old shout-outs that there's a good chance the people reading these words right now don't know what they are! In operation, "FriendSpace" seems to function a little bit more like Facebook, in the way you "friend" people, tag them in photographs, and how notifications pop up. The script at least acknowledges that such a platform – which several people talk about using on their computers holy shit – is the social media app of choice for old people. What does it position as the hip, young alternative that is beloved by the trend-chasing glamouratti? SnarkChat, an obvious spoof of Snapchat. When was the last time someone sent you anything on Snapchat? In 2024, if you're messaging people on Snapchat, you might as well be sending them a carrier pigeon. They'll be dead by the time they read it. 

If "Chain Letter" was out-of-date when it first aired, watching it seven years after the fact is truly like stepping back in time. Simply the fact that everyone refers to connecting with people on these platforms as "friend"ing seems ancient. None of us want friends anymore. We want followers. Social media has changed so much over the last decade. There's a scene here where Amy and Knuckles are sending each other messages, chatting and laughing at jokes. Nobody used social media to talk to their actual friends anymore! That's what Discord and Telegram are for, applications that very well may become abandoned ghost towns by the time this review goes up. Social media is for becoming outraged, for watching the world decay in real time. The people in this episode use social media like a bunch of old boomers, sharing faux-inspirational quotes with Minions slapped on them. The only accurate thing about social media this episode gets right is Sonic rushing to make a Scrambler account simply so he won't be left out. Remember when everyone jumped over to BlueSky and Threads, platforms that are desolate wastelands now? Fear Of Missing Out still drives a lot of online traffic, even if it can't sustain a community. 

"Chain Letter's" writer Peter Saisselin couldn't have imagined the way TikTok or AI or Cryptocurrency would make the world worse in bold, new ways. 2017 also wasn't that long ago. It was still the post-Trump era, when it became clear that the spread of misinformation online could have disastrous effects in the real world. (Which is referenced in a quick line about "the Mayor's private e-mail server.") The episode is certainly not socially aware enough to take on a menace like that but it does get one thing right: We are inundated with bullshit on social media. In 2024, it's not clickbait, pictures of people's lunches, and chain letters. Instead, it's conspiracy theories about how Democrats drink baby blood or disturbingly uncanny "artwork" a robot burnt down a patch of rain forest to churn out. And ads. Mostly, it's lots and lots of fucking ads. That is the endgame of Facebook and Twitter and all the rest stealing our personal data to sell to the highest bidder, a habit sardonically referred to in the script. The scene where Eggman and his robot assistants conceive of Scrambler – which, in 2024, would definitely have an easily copyrighted spelling like Scrmblr – details the various ways social media is designed to get people's attention and placate our need for admiration without anyone putting in actual effort. This was before the algorithm started ruling our lives, when every thought your brain farted out wasn't instantly swarmed by porn-bots. The effect is more or less the same, however. Our minds are now deafened by an ever-present storm of distraction, making it difficult to accomplish anything. 

There's a scene in "Chain Letter" where Sonic is walking through the village looking at the citizens, as they wander around hunched over their phones, their faces lit by a little screen, glued to inconsequential internet chatter. This is not that different from a type of old person scolding so commonplace that it has been reduced to a two word phrase: Phone bad. Either by keen observation of the human condition or sheer coincidence, Saisselin's script does get at a deeper truth. Eggman launches Scrambler. It becomes a hit. Everyone on the island is using it. He has thousands of online friends... And he still feels so alone. Cliched as it is to say it, the fact is online fame and attention is not nearly as gratifying as we've all been led to believe. Humans still exist in the real world and we still crave that face-to-face interaction. To hear another person's voice, to feel their warmth next to us, to smell their B.O. wafting up our noses. Our brains have been tricked enough to give us a dopamine hit for every like and heart and retweet and follow and stitch we get. That does nothing to keep us from being increasingly isolated in a world that's melting down. Maybe the scolding old people are right. A look around at the state of things presents the hard-to-deny fact that phone is bad.

"Sonic Boom's" attempt to take on what is new and fresh with a graying, arthritic approach ends up getting a lot of silly shit wrong while also accidentally nailing a few other aspects. At the end of the episode, Sonic confronts Eggman about Scrambler. The two have a heart-to-heart, concluding with Sonic finally accepting Eggman's friend request... Only for the mad doctor to unfriend him. Getting everyone hooked on Scrambler could've been a villainous ploy of Eggman's, a part of his latest scheme to rule the globe. Sonic suspects as much. Instead, his entire motivation is no more complicated than wanting to spite someone who hurt his feelings. I'm going to promote this review on an application bought out – and made substantially less functional – by a billionaire because his pop star ex-wife left him. As I write this, a failed casino owner who conned his way into the White House by weaponizing internet culture war bullshit, on his way to an attempted coup and dismantling of democracy, is trying another go at it. And why? Because he got made fun of him at a dinner thirteen years ago. The world does revolve around the petty, childish whims of rich assholes. A tech mogul sinking billions into a new start-up simply so he can point at one specific person and scream "Up yours!" at them is so plausible, it barely needs to be commented on. As much as I hate to give Aaron Sorkin any credit, he was right about that. 

At the end of the episode, having completed his goal, Eggman deletes Scrambler. This enraged the villagers but Eggman doesn't mind. He's decided that having 500 million enemies is as good as a few friends. This is an amusing conclusion that furthers one of the primary running gags of this show. Despite being an evil genius capable of manufacturing massive weapons of war, Eggman still has the mentality of a moody kid. This is very clear in the scene where he meets Sonic and friends on the soccer field, petulantly whining that they should be his pretend cyber-buddies. It's funny but it feeds back into that dispiriting truth, that pathetic personal grievances too often motivate powerful men. As much as we hate the likes of Eggman, Elon, and ExxonMobil CEO Darren Woods, they are still human beings. Eggman goes around the village, asking people to be his friend, to like him. When they inevitably say no, he walks off in a huff. It is disturbingly easy to imagine Musk or Trump doing that exact thing. How many of the architects of our mutual doom have been inspired by an unfulfilled need to be liked? How many are desperate to have a simple desire for affection sated?

I feel this review got kinda dark. Let me wrap up by saying that "Chain Letter," as factually inept but secretly depressing as it might be, did make me laugh a decent amount. There is a shockingly fucked-up joke about Dave repeatedly hitting Old Man Monkey with his car. It keeps going! Another quality stretched-out gag involves the increasingly nonsensical lingo social media platforms use for basic features, which climaxes in an amusingly sarcastic wink from Sonic. There's some groaners, about old people not understanding technology, the Meh Burger complaint box, or the use of the phrase "fleek." However, I guess it was all worth it for a funny pong reference. Who doesn't love a good pong reference? 

Now that I think about it though... If Eggman had no friends on FriendSpace, who sent him the chain letters in the first place? Maybe the ghost of the dead girl did it. That's scary! So is being horribly left-behind on trends, the pathetic loneliness at the heart of all social media, and the tech giants that run them. I guess that means this was a spooktactular episode of "Sonic Boom" after all! Happy Halloween, Hedgehogs Can't Swim readers! Now, excuse me, I have to go check my notifications on Instagram and see how many upvotes a pithy comment I left on a Reddit post of a weird looking dog got... [7/10]