Sonic & Friends
Original Release Date: August 7th, 2023
My quest to watch and review as many pieces of animated "Sonic the Hedgehog" media has led me to some unexpected places: Blurry rips from the Sega Saturn, the forgettable corners of YouTube, and into hardcore weebery. Today, this ridiculous journey has me crossing over into another area I never expected to go. My friends, what is your opinion on TikTok? It was recently a matter of congressional debate here in America, because we live in the stupidest century. What started as an app for teenagers to upload them doing dumb dances has turned into another inescapable aspect of our society. I feel like me, as a 36 year old man, shouldn't have an opinion on TikTok. I should barely know what it is. However, breaking information up into quickly edited, tiny chunks of video has made a definite impact on the world. I wager it's probably been a negative impact, wrecking people's attention spans, spreading falsehoods far and wide, and surely becoming a cesspool of machine-generated slop. This is probably my status as a cranky old man, naturally suspicious and fearful of new technology, talking here. However, the impression remains that TikTok has probably made us all stupider.
Not me, of course, because I don't use it. Except to look at stuff my girlfriend sends me, I do my best not to interact with the app. Nevertheless, my logical brain must conclude that TikTok, like any platform, is neutral in and of itself. The super-short video is a medium that can used for artistic expression. I've watched those Vine compilations. Some of those are pretty funny or even clever. I'm sure there are people somewhere in the depths of TikTok who use it for artistic expression, who aren't merely trying to gather social media clout or make money by promoting stuff. Living in the time we do, any new platform is immediately going to be invaded by corporations. All of this is to say that TikTok has become yet another avenue for businesses to promote themselves, sell their product, or even upload content made exclusively for the platform. There are now "TikTok series," programs written, directed, and created with the intent of being shown on the app. What a time to be alive, I guess.
Now I finally arrive at my point. Part of why I think "Sonic the Hedgehog," as a franchise, has been able to survive – perhaps even flourish – in the new decade is because its characters and themes are universal. I don't like it when Sonic and the gang are reduced to stereotypical concepts. Sonic should be more than only the fast and mischievous hero, Knuckles should be more than merely the dumb friend. However, such simplicity is mutable and allows these characters to work in any number of settings. This has made it easy to adapt "Sonic" to new medias and platforms. Twitter and YouTube have both been good to the blue hedgehog, so why not TikTok? And so, in August of 2023, Sega would put their heads together and conceive of a new series of super-short cartoons for the format called "Sonic & Friends." As of this writing, 53 of these computer-generated animations have been uploaded, on a semi-weekly schedule. Each short is only a few seconds long and features super-cute chibi versions of Sonic and the gang – that could easily be made into huggable plushies! – simply doing adorable little antics. From glancing at the sentence long synopses on the wiki, it seems like almost all of the episodes are devoted simply to these cutified versions of Sonic and his pals dancing.
In other words, "Sonic & Friends" is not this franchise's several decades late answer to "Muppet Babies." It is not the equivalent to those weird videos where Pink Girl Godzilla teaches kids how to count and be friends. Those programs, juvenile as they may be, have dialogue, plots, and consistent character traits. They tell a story or, at least, teach its audience something. It is an expression of something within the hearts of the people behind them. "Sonic & Friends" can, more directly, be called the "Sonic" version of "Cocomelon." It is pre-verbal entertainment, bright colors and repetitive noises flashing on-screen to hypnotize hyper toddlers into a stunned stupor, so that their parents can get a moment of peace. It is, to be kind, "content" more than it is art. It is, more accurately, bullshit for iPad babies, the definition of the churned out and meritless product that the internet has increasingly taken to calling, not incorrectly, "slop."
Truthfully, animation such as this presents a real challenge to the reviewer. When I said most of the episodes are devoted to Sonic and friends dancing, I'm not exaggerating. Lots of “Sonic & Friends” are devoted to these super-adorable takes on these familiar characters moving their hands, heads, and legs in rhythm to obnoxious peppy Japanese pop songs. Most of the songs strike me as nothing but high-pitched and annoying, sometimes seeming to lack lyrics and instead be composed more of... Sounds. Like kissy noises or chicken clucks. To make these clips more likely to fry the brain pans of a six-month old, brightly color shapes and symbols often scatter around the characters as they shimmy and shake. Several of the “Sonic & Friends” clips have the heroes dancing in detailess voids of bright colors, existing literally only as motion and sound to distract the most easily amused of audiences. The only songs I recognized out of those featured is “All I Want for Christmas is You” – but not the Mariah version – and “Baby Shark,” which is also exactly the kind of beige YouTube glop for infants I've been describing.
While most of “Sonic & Friends” can be described as nothing much at all, occasionally a narrative of some sort does emerge. In-between all the dancing and bopping, there have been at least three identifiable plots. The first had Sonic, Tails, and Amy heading to an island and camping overnight in a tent, before attempting to use a giant blender to make a fruit smoothie. The second involved Amy enjoying a swing before Eggman showed up and shrank everyone with a shrink ray, leading to the heroes avoiding getting eaten by a lizard. They eventually track Eggman down and reverse their condition. The most recent plot seems to involve Shadow zipping around and eating everyone's fruit. Sonic gets blamed for it by Amy but declares his innocence before going in search of the real culprit. Then Knuckles punches a tree until a giant purple snake falls out and chases him. I am quivering in suspense to see how that will be resolved, let me tell you.
Clearly, the point I'm making here is, the few times “Sonic & Friends” does bother to have some sort of story, it's still an extremely simplistic endeavor. You could slot any cast of cartoon characters into these roles and things wouldn't change much at all. I want to say that this is Sonic and the gang reduced down to their most basic components. I'm not sure if that's technically true either. I guess Sonic is fast, Tails builds stuff, Eggman is a bad guy, Amy is girly and swings a hammer. I suppose we see Knuckles being strong and dumb a few times? I suppose some admiration can be expressed for the modeling and animation, which is perfectly acceptable. I'll admit, these character designs are cute, I guess. They aren't as demonic as your average Funko Pop. I do think it represents the “Sonic” style, already very cute and marketable, being pressed down into its most baby-ified and generic form. But I've seen worst, I guess is my point.
By the way, “Sonic & Friends” seems to be produced almost entirely by Sega of Japan. That means this is what the corporation that directly owns Sonic wants the franchise to be. I've argued before that Sega sees Sonic and friends as nothing but empty mascots that can be used to advertise whatever product they seek to sell. That the designs here are directly based on toys that already exists really tells you everything you need to know about “Sonic & Friends.” It's targeted at the youngest possible audience. Perhaps out of the belief that, if Sega can hook 'em early, they'll have fans for life. Or maybe, considering Sonic's general lack of popularity in Japan, maybe pitching the franchise at the most undiscerning of audiences – literal babies – is the only way they know to sell it. Will I watch more of “Sonic & Friends?” Maybe. I'm pretty bored, I'll watch all sorts of shit. Will I write about more of “Sonic & Friends?” Not unless that storyline with the big purple snake gets really exciting... [4/10]