HEDGEHOGS CAN'T SWIM UPDATES WILL RESUME ON OCTOBER 3RD!

Listen, everyone has to take a break occasionally. I'm a road trip this weekend, which leaves me with little time for blog updating. Everything will be back to normal on Monday. Until then, go outside and drink a pumpkin spice latte or something. See you soon, faithful readers.

Sonic Super Special: Issue 6 – Sonic #50 Director’s Cut

Sonic Super Special: Issue 6 – Sonic #50 Director’s Cut
Publication Date: July 1998

When the final part of the “Endgame” saga was originally published, it arrived on comic store shelves in a compromised form. Originally, “Endgame” was going to conclude with a double-stuffed issue. However, that didn’t happened, forcing the final product to loose about half its pages. I went over all of this in my review of Issue 50. Either luckily or unluckily, depending on how you feel about “Endgame,” the extended version of issue 50 was published as the sixth Sonic Super Special. Incorrectly called “The Director’s Cut” on the cover – “Extended Cut,” “Writer’s Cut” or just “Uncut” would all be more accurate – the issue reprints the final part of “Endgame” the way it was meant to be seen.

Plot wise, “For Whom the Bell Tolls” runs the same as issue 50’s “The Big Goodbye.” Robotnik plans to activate the Ultimate Annihilator, wiping Knothole Village off the map. In Downunda, the local Freedom Fighters help Bunnie and Antoine escape. As they make it back to Mobotropolis, they tamper with Robotnik’s doomsday machine. Sonic’s tense confrontation on the Floating Island with Geoffrey St. John and Knuckles is cut short by Dulcy’s reappearance. Assuring them that he’s telling the truth, they head to Knothole and kick some ass. Afterwards, Sonic races towards Robotropolis, having his final showdown with Ivo Robotnik.

Issue 50 – a book I like – had a lot of problems. The Director’s Cut, unfortunately, only clears up some of Penders’ typically messy plotting. That bullshit about dragon’s being able to detect truth is still intact. Sonic and Knuckles still liberate Knothole in only two pages. Antoine and Bunnie still arrive in Robotropolis far too quickly. Lastly, that bordering-on-incoherent resolution is intact. All that business about Dr. Quack betraying the king and Knothole slipping into a pocket dimension three hours in the future? Yeah, still there. It’s a tad sad to realize these plot holes weren’t the result of missing pages. Turns out the writers are just fond of bullshit story turns.

The extended version does clear up two minor plot holes. Now, we see the Downunda Freedom Fighters escape Crocbot’s prison. We see Bunnie and Antoine sneak aboard the transport ship. That’s nice, since the published version just had us assume that happened. (These segments, happily, only reuse some artwork from “Down and Out in Downunda,” the flashback heavy story published in Sonic Super Special Issue 4.) Another plot hole clarified is the destruction of Knothole. Instead of that happening off-screen, Sonic now sees it with his own eyes. That makes the brutal fight that follows between the hedgehog and the robotic dictator seem more reasonable.

So if it doesn’t resolve the reader’s confusion, why does the long version add to “Endgame?” About sixteen pages. Early on, we see Robotnik execute a fellow Overlander, someone he knew from the first Great War. Other than showing just how ruthless Robotnik is, and displaying how effective the Ultimate Annihilator is as ultimately annihilating things, those two pages don’t add much. About four pages are devoted to the events in Downunda, with some nicely gritty artwork from Nelson Ortega. Later on, a whole heaping set of pages have Bunnie and Antoine explaining their plan to Sonic. I’m not exactly sure that adds too much to the story. Essentially, the plot gets garbled enough that characters have to stop what they’re doing and explain what’s going on. That’s never good.

However, there are a few additions I like. The most important one shows Hershey getting her revenge on Drago. In #50 as originally published, a small rock tossed at his head is enough to bring the sleazy wolf down. Here, Hershey beats the ever-loving crap out of him. She scratches him across the face, knees in hard in the groin, pounces on him, punches him a bunch, and nearly crushes his head with a big ass rock. This makes Drago look like less of a light-weight. Considering what a scum bag he is, it’s also pretty satisfying. It doesn’t make up for Hershey being such a weak character but it’s cathartic for the reader.

The fight between Sonic and Robotnik goes on a little longer. I’m not sure who did the artwork for these new pages. It might be Steven Butler and, if it is, he might be having an off-day. Either way, Sonic is super angry and scatters some more SWATBots. I’m a fan of Angry Sonic and wish we saw him more often. At the conclusion of the fight, after both hedgehog and huge ass slip into the Ultimate Annihilator, there’s a one-page pencil spread of the two locked in combat, provided by Spaz. That’s cool. The page of blank whiteness that follows is unnecessary. Still, it does make a big fight seem a little more big. Lastly, a splash page of Sonic and the resurrected Sally locking lips, beautifully rendered by Art Mawhinney, is added near the end. You know I’m a die hard Sonic/Sally guy, so it’s satisfying to see them finally lock lips after so long. Especially since we know it’ll never happen again.

Normally, I’d ask if the quote-unquote “director’s” cut of Issue 50 is worth picking up for anybody but die-hard Sonic fanatics. Archie has answered that question for me though. This is the version of the story included in all future reprints. The extended version of “Endgame” has essentially replaced the original cut. Truthfully, it’s only a marginal improvement. The shorter cut, which I spent far more time thumbing over as a kid, is probably the version I’ll always prefer. As far as unnecessary director’s cuts go, this is slightly less useless than the “Donnie Darko” director’s cut. In other words: Still flawed, still satisfying. [7/10]

Knuckles the Echidna: Issue 16

Knuckles the Echidna: Issue 16
Publication Date: July 1998

After the business of “The Forgotten Tribe” arc and the action heavy “Chaotix Caper” three-parter, “Knuckles the Echidna” takes a bit of a breather with issue 16. Of course, to Ken Penders, a “breather” means a comic that includes lots of mythology building, a bunch of new characters, political hand-wringing, and serious revelations about Knuckles’ past.

After teleporting out of the desert, Knuckles finds himself in his mom’s apartment. He has a heart-to-heart with Lara-Le, who informs him that Knuckles was unusually intelligent as a baby. Afterwards, he discovers that his mom and Wynmacher are getting married. Which upsets the boy. Luckily, Julie-Su and the Chaotix are there to comfort him. Meanwhile, the Brotherhood of Guardians gather in Haven. A discussion about Mobius’ post-Robotnik status segues into a debate about Knuckles’ growing power.

“Reunions” easily shows both Ken Penders’ strengths and weaknesses as a writer. This was a guy who was willing to tell a serious story with a cast of funny animals. He has filled Knuckles’ universe with far more depth then you’d ever expect. He also takes the relationship between the characters seriously. At the same time, he’s obsessed with his own convoluted mythology. Too often, the compelling aspect of the book are sacrificed for more exposition, more debate about mystic events of the far past or the distant future.

The stuff between Knuckles and his mother is potentially touching. While Locke hides like a coward, spies on his son, and micro-manages the boy's life, Knuckles has had lots of interaction with his mom. Lara-Le greeting her son with a hug and a kiss is cute. Knuckles’ reaction to his mom re-marrying is realistic. He storms out of the apartment, shocked and confused. I can relate to the weird rush of emotion that comes when a parent re-marries. Knuckles, whose life has changed so much here of late, must take it especially hard. It helps that the book has portrayed Wynmacher as such a normal, loving guy, almost to the point of making him dull.

Unfortunately, this part of the book also has Penders once again hammering home Knuckles’ Great Destiny. We discover that he was super-smart as a baby and that his father probably experimented on him before he hatched. (Echidnas lay eggs, by the way.) The idea of Knuckles being some super-being, even beyond his duties as a Guardian, has never appealed to me. It’s kind of boring, honestly. The flashbacks also don’t help Lara-Le’s character development. We discover that she knew from the beginning her husband wasn’t trust-worthy. Which raises the question of why she went ahead with the marriage. When she seeks advice from her mother-in-law, the older woman basically tells her to stand by her man. No wonder the marriage ended. Lara-Le was afraid to act and Locke was a manipulative, secretive dick bag.

Speaking of manipulative, secretive dick bags! Issue 16 opens up Haven and the Brotherhood more. We meet a bunch of Knuckles’ ancestors, like elderly Tobor, strangely purple Thunderhawk, gruff and mysterious Spectre, and the non-descript Sojourner. Unlike Locke and Sabre, who just ramble on endlessly about mysticism and destiny, Spectre and Thunderhawk aren’t afraid to speak up about the Brotherhood’s bullshit. That’s refreshing. Combined with interesting designs, that’s probably why those two were always the most popular of Knuckles’ extended family.

But the Brotherhood stuff is still a bore. It’s revealed that the retired Guardians observe all of Mobius, not just the Floating Island. There’s lots of debate about what to do in the fallout of Robotnik’s defeat, about his former generals fighting for control. Considering these are human (Mobian?) lives they are pettily squabbling about, it doesn’t make the Brotherhood seem any less dickish. Making the echidnas the secret architects of the planet doesn’t discourage the belief that Penders’ considered his original character more important than Sega’s creation. Tobor and Thunderhawk even dismiss Sonic’s adventures! When the Fire Ants show up and start talking about stuff… Jesus Christ, I don’t care.

How torn I am about issue 16 is truly summed up in its final sequence. After leaving his mother’s apartment, Knuckles finds some alone time, chilling on a dock. Julie-Su, against the opinions of the other Chaotix, goes to check up on him. While Knuckles is busy moping, Julie-Su gives him a kiss. It’s a cute moment. I wish Knuckles and Julie-Su’s relationship received more attention. After all, last time he saw her, she was in handcuffs and assumed to be an ally of the Dark Legion. Still, the kiss is an earned moment, considering the character’s obvious attraction to each other. The final page, of the two sitting in silence on the dock, is rather sweet.

Once again, Ken has to take an elegant moment and bog it down in bullshit. Instead of just having Julie-Su and Knuckles be attracted to each other, being teenagers of the same species with complimentary personalities, he teases the Soul Touch. Yep, echidnas have a magical drive to seek out their future mate. Once they find them, an attraction begins, regardless of how they feel. Gee whiz, Ken, couldn’t Knuckles and Julie-Su have just like each other? Must everything be some sort of mystic destiny? So much for free will.

Still, “Reunions” is an interesting story. It shows that, when he paused to focus on characters, Penders was a decent writer. Disappointingly, even a mellow issue of “Knuckles” must be racing towards the series’ on-going myth arc. So it goes. [6.5/10]

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 63

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 63
Publication Date: July 1998

After a promising first part, the “Icon” two-parter ends on a disappointing note. Before we get to that though, let’s talk about that awesome cover. Sometimes less is more. Sonic leaning against a beautifully detailed statue of himself, amid a white backdrop, is immediately eye-catching and striking. There’s no big action or multiple characters. Just one guy and the centerpiece of the story. Spaz’ covers are always great but this might be one of my all-time favorites.

Anyway, the plot. “Icon 2: Cult of Personality” picks up with Sonic in the lap of luxury. He gets hand delivered chili dogs and daily massages. Tails, however, remains paranoid. The Sand-Blasters’ scheme to keep Sonic in the city for several more weeks doesn’t sit well with the fox. He’s right to be worried, as Jack Rabbit intends to keep Sonic there forever. The hedgehog’s not dumb though. He’s merely been playing dumb as not to alert their captors. The two perform a late night escape, deactivating the shield protecting Sand Blast City from the hostile Robians. Meanwhile, Snively and the other villains riot at Devil’s Gulag, preparing to make their own escape.

The biggest let-down with “Icon” is how it resolves so few of the questions we had after the first chapter. Why do the Sand-Blasters want to keep Sonic in the city? Because they admire him so much? So he can continue to protect them from the Robians? No answer is provided. Furthermore, what’s up with the violent Robians? Why are they soulless, when compared to the Mobotropolis Freedom Fighters? Why are they attacking Sand-Blast City? Bollers delivered a good set-up but either a lack of page space or just plain ol’ sloppy plotting prevents his story from being properly fleshed out.

Maybe that’s because the focus is on action. Honestly, I was a little disappointed that Sonic was onto Jack Rabbit’s scheme. Seeing our hero occasionally played for a dupe would’ve humanized him a little. Nope, Sonic knows something is up and has been plotting his own escape for a while. The Sand-Blasters are quick as well and block his escape. What follows is Sonic quickly dusting off the Sand-Blasters and Tails finding the repaired Winged Victory. This is disappointing too, as the duo easily disposes of the bad guys. Tails even drops a tarp on the team after the ol’ “Let ‘em go!” routine. Truly, the best moment here is when Sonic realizes the big ass statue of him in the center of town is also where the battery for the force field is kept. Sonic being forced to smash a statue of himself, and thus destroy his own sense of entitlement as a hero, is a good moment.

What follows is less of a good moment. The destructive Robians enter Sand-Blast City, like the zombies storming the mall at the end of “Dawn of the Dead.” Sonic is worried that his goose is cooked... Before Tails swoops down in the Winged Victory and rescues him. The two fly away from a city in flames. When Tails suggests that the Sand-Blasters weren’t all that bad and perhaps they could return, Sonic shoots him down. That’s right, kids. Our heroes just doomed an entire city, presumably with its fair share of innocent by-standers, and flew off without a care for any of them. Not exactly role model behavior, now is it? I know Sonic can be kind of a dick sometimes but this asshole behavior may be a bridge too far, even for him.

Bollers does do one clever thing. Snively and the other bad guys escaping from the Devil’s Gulag is contrasted with Sonic and Tails flying away from Sand-Blast City. As for that subplot, I like that Drago and the gang don’t outright murder Snively. They believe he freed them, somehow, and think it might be useful to have him around. That’s the kind of clear headed thinking you don’t expect from a bunch of thugs and killers. Still, this subplot is another example of how fast and loose Boller’s writing is, as we still don’t know why they were set free. All in good time, I suppose.

At least Steven Butler’s artwork is still aces. I love his gritty sense of detail. Sand-Blast City is such an interesting looking place, dusty and quasi-apocalyptic. There’s some solid action artwork here too. Sonic smashing through the statue of himself warrants a one-page spread. The chaos of the attacking Robians is handled well. I really only have two objections to the artwork. Continuity is a bit loose. For example, Sgt. Simian is wearing an entirely different outfit than what he had on last time. This isn’t Butler’s fault but Sonic has blue arms for about half of the issue. I also wonder if it was necessary to draw the female masseurs and waitress servicing Sonic on the first page quite so suggestively. This is still a kid’s book, after all. Still, Butler’s artwork helps elevate a story that has some problems.

The back-up story has Geoffrey’s squad of new recruits heading out on a training mission. They storm a former Robotnik building. The robots and guard systems inside apparently still function. The story shows the team working together nicely. Geoffrey St. John leads. Valdez uses his chameleon skills to sneak up and yank out some important cables. Heavy uses his mechanical interface to talk to the still on-line computer. Wombat Stu, uh, carries the rope. Hershey stands back and makes catty comments. It’s all in service of retrieving a functional SWATBot, which will probably be useful. The action is pretty low-key, even if Art Mawhineny makes it look far more exciting and dramatic than it actually is. While the team is still woefully undefined, it’s nice to finally see them actually working together and accomplishing something.

What makes the third part of “On Her Majesty’s Secret Service” interesting is Sally. Yep, she’s here. The back-up story begins with her confronting Commander Smiley about what the hell St. John has been up to recently. He denies her access, saying she doesn’t have clearance for it. Properly pissed, Sally directly asks Geoffrey who has approval above the Princess. The King, that’s who! So Sally discovers her dad doesn’t trust her and her potential love interest is more then happy to keep her out of the loop. Isn’t that just like Penders to push the most interesting part of the story to the sidelines? I really love the look of shock Mawhinney draws on Sally’s face when she learns her dad outranks her. Art probably still draws my favorite take on Sally.

It’s a bummer that what could’ve been the most experimental period for Archie’s “Sonic” comic has continued to be undermined by sloppy writing. Another interesting story arc fails to pay off. That’s the name of the game, I guess. [6/10]

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 62

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 62
Publication Date: June 1998

When I said Karl Bollers was the new head-writer of “Sonic” back in my review of issue 54, I might have been exaggerating. Ever since the start of the New Direction, with Sonic and Tails walking the Earth like Caine in “Kung Fu,” it seems like Bollers has only written a few stories. Old-timers like Mike Gallagher or unwelcomed newcomers like Frank Strom seem to be dominating things. With issue 62, Bollers returns with what is probably my favorite story arc from the post-“Endgame” world.

While flying over the Great Desert, Sonic and Tails’ bi-plane begins to choke out. They make a swift crash-landing. Though the plane is damaged, Sonic and Tails are fine. In the desert, they’re quickly met by a group of tanks and armored trucks. Inside are a group of desert-based creatures calling themselves the Sand-Blasters. They adore Sonic, considering him a mythic hero. The centerpiece of their city is a huge statue of Sonic and, that night, they throw a big party for the hedgehog. However, Tails notices that something is up. The city is beset by hostile Robians who the Sand-Blasters vehemently hate. The other team also seems very invested in keeping Sonic and Tails there as long as possible. Meanwhile, on Devil’s Gulag prison, Snively and the other criminals are mysteriously freed from their cells.

“Icon” has a set-up like a horror story. We’ve seen the tale before. A couple traveling through a barren location find a place of safety, usually a hotel, that only brings them more trouble. “Psycho” is a prominent example of this story. “Wolf Creek” fits as well. “Icon” isn’t a horror story but it has a similar sense of underlying tension. There’s something off-putting about the Sand-Blasters. They’re blind hero worship of Sonic is slightly creepy. The almost racial hatred they have of Robians does not paint them in the best light. When Tails awakes the next morning, their hotel room has been locked from the outside. The Sand-Blasters tell them the Winged Victory won’t be flying again for weeks. Interestingly, this story plays off Sonic’s weaknesses as a character. He doesn’t notice how off the entire situation is because Sonic has always been a show-off and slightly arrogant. People practically worshiping him puts him in a blind spot.

It’s a good set-up which, slightly disappointingly, is all this story is. Just as it’s starting to get really interesting, “Icon” ends. There’s a lot of question lingering in the readers’ minds. Where do the hostile Robians come from? Why are they acting like mindless drones, while the Knothole Robians maintained their free will? What are the Sand-Blasters’ final plan? More importantly, what’s going to happen to Sonic and Tails when they discover the inevitable subterfuge? You can’t blame a story for leaving the reader wanting more. I just wish Bollers’ had a little more room to explore his creation here.

Character wise, there isn’t much to the Sand-Blasters. Design wise, they make an immediate impression. Jack Rabbit, their leader, has a studded leather eye-patch, a bandolier, a side-arm, and bandages covering his arms and legs. He looks like Bucky O’Hare’s biker ancestor. In a cute joke, most of the Sand-Blasters are patterned after Looney Toons characters. There’s a green mohawked roadrunner, a wiry coyote, and a fearsome alligator. It’s interesting to note that the Sand-Blasters traverse the desert in tanks and trucks deck out in machine guns. That, combined with their leather clothing, makes it look like Sonic and Tails wandered into a Mobian version of “The Road Warrior.”

Less compelling is the subplot about Devil’s Gulag. It’s not that Snively, sitting in his cell and talking shit with Drago, isn’t amusing. It is. There’s a lot of potential in seeing what the scumbags of Mobius get up to when left to their own. Morally bankrupt characters like Nack and Drago have always been interesting. In a world without major baddies like Robotnik or Mammoth Mogul, what could they get up too? However, how the villains escape is a total question mark. In space, we see a satellite floating over the planet. Someone aboard presses a button, freeing the captive crooks. Even as a kid in 1998, I understood what was happening here. Robotnik’s corpse hasn’t even cooled and the book was already priming for his return. Not even a dozen issues have passed since his demise.

A big shining bonus in issue 62’s favor is Steven Butler’s artwork. Holy shit, it’s good, you guys. The amount of detail in Butler’s work is insane. The opening two-page spread of the bi-plane crashes is incredible, trees tossed into the air by the spinning propeller. The Robians look incredibly creepy, appearing to be robotic demons. The vehicles and armors of the Sand-Blaster are vividly depicted. When Butler drew the Sonic characters, they always seemed slightly taller, more mature. He was also great at action. Sonic spinning into a cyclone, kicking up a massive dust storm, could’ve been badly drawn. Yet Butler keeps it alive, producing some dynamic art. The final page of the story, of the villains rioting in Devil’s Gulag, looks like Spaz could’ve drawn it. Fantastic.

The back-up story continues the “Tales of the Freedom Fighters” arc. Now that Geoffrey St. John has assembled his team, he has to start training them. Heavy and Bomb are quickly added, after blowing up Geoffrey’s office. The next day he shows the team their secret weapon - a device that fires a concussive blast - before he drops Hershey into a pool with a robotic shark. She doesn’t immediately die, the team saves her, and Geoffrey proclaims the first day of training a success.

My biggest problem with this arc continues. Penders doesn’t provide us with a good bead on any of these characters. Valdez the Chameleon remains a mystery. Wombat Stu, probably the least fleshed-out member of the Downunda Freedom Fighters, plays like a less intelligent, slightly scrappier version of Tails. Hershey is a damsel in distress in this story. I still don’t know why someone who tried to assassinate royalty would be selected to be a royal spy. Why do Heavy and Bomb want in on this? Heavy basically says “there’s nothing else for us to do” and Geoffrey lets them on the team. The ensemble is interesting but there’s so little to go on.

As an action story, this works slightly better. The back-up promises us a peak at what role espionage will play in a post-Robotnik world. It doesn’t really deliver but the promise is worth something. The action beat, of the team working together to rescue Hershey from a robot shark, isn’t bad. I mean, a sentient bomb throwing himself into the mouth of a robot shark and then exploding is worth something. Art Mawhinney’s artwork is swell. I especially like the shot of other trainees practicing their skills. Archie should’ve let Mawhinney design characters more often. I would’ve liked to have seen more of the raccoon girl dangling off the gymnastic rings, for one example.

An mysterious, promising cover story and an overly thin if competent back-up story? That’s a [7/10] for you, issue 62.

Knuckles the Echidna: Issue 15

Knuckles the Echidna: Issue 15
Publication Date: June 1998

After an incredibly awkward middle chapter, “The Chaotix Caper” recenters in its final act. Julie-Su and Remington escape detection by Ebony Hare and his gang. They track the crook to the factory where he’s poisoning the chili dog sauce with the L.S.D. The Chaotix get out of the hospital just in time to assist them, aside from Charmy who is still recovering from surgery. The near death experience has the bee reconsidering his own life decisions. Meanwhile, in the desert, Knuckles’ powers continue to grow in intensity.

The biggest problem with the conclusion to “The Chaotix Caper” is that Ebony Hare’s motivation still isn’t clarified. After the encounter with Julie-Su and Remington, the bad guy feels the heat. He decides to shut down his operation for a while. What the crime boss hoped to accomplished by dosing the chili sauce with L.S.D. isn’t explained. Why he teamed with Renfield T. Rodent, sneaking the drug out through Happyland, also aren’t elaborated on. If the L.S.D. is addictive, we see no signs of this. With the exception of Charmy, the Chaotix are just fine after their dosing. It’s definitely an underdeveloped aspect of the story. Ebony Hare and his gang are undefined bad guys, doing evil stuff for no apparent reason.

Rutterless villains aren’t enough to derail what is otherwise a fun issue. No. 15 is action-packed, moving quickly. Julie-Su escapes her seemingly fatal plunge by grabbing a grappling hook from a hidden department in her boots. (This explains why she wears those ridiculous boots but still doesn’t justify the half-vest/tank top number.) Julie-Su swinging into an apartment building and sneaking around with Remington is good fun.

The sneaking continues to be fun when they head for the factory district. The Chaotix leaving the hospital allows the team to rejoin the action. This builds to a fun climax in the factory. Julie-Su and Espio avoid the big ass revolver Hare brings with him. Remington is about to get murdereized by Blackjack when Mighty saves his ass, a funny moment. Vector proves kind of useful by grabbing Hare’s moll, an otherwise pointless character. Getting to see the Chaotix be crook-smashing bad asses is fun. It’s the reason we read the book.

The team interaction serves another purpose. After two story arcs of Julie-Su’s loyalties being undetermined, “The Chaotix Caper” has her finally being accepted as a member of the team. Vector doesn’t make one despairing remark about her the whole issue! In many ways, Julie-Su is the most competent member of the Chaotix. She certainly gets the best action beats. Espio’s ability to cloak himself comes up a few times, which is nice. While Mighty’s super strength is useful, it’s his sense of humor that truly characterizes him. Another thing I really like is that several other characters repeatedly call out how fucking useless Vector is. It’s kind of odd that the Chaotix finally came together as a team after Knuckles is out of the picture for a while.

The team is important to this story. Charmy isn’t in most of the issue, as he’s in surgery on the first page. How exactly some drugged chili dogs made him sick enough that invasive surgery was required, I don’t know. Apparently, the close calls has the boy change his mind about his destiny. The finale of issue 15 is genuinely touching, as Charmy returns to his hive to bury Mello. Hearing heart-felt goodbyes to a fallen friend, followed by a rose being dropped on the casket, isn’t something you’d expect to see in a “Sonic the Hedgehog” comic. At story’s end, Charmy decides to rejoin the hive and take on his royal title. Just when the character was getting interesting, Ken goes and writes him out of the book. Still, at least Charmy gets a decent farewell.

I like “The Chaotix Caper” story arc for another, possibly entirely puerile reason. This is about as dark as Archie’s “Sonic”-verse has ever gotten. The story begins with a child dying. The villains are poisoning unsuspecting innocents. The main cast unknowingly takes a dose of hallucinogenic drugs. Julie-Su is thrown to her death, nearly hitting the pavement. The villains and heroes alike brandish big ass guns, threatening to shoot people. Considering this is a universe that started with a cartoon hedgehog running fast, collecting rings, and jumping on robot’s heads, that’s a startling change. And one I welcome. A more grounded, dangerous world is a more exciting one.

A story thread burdening the entire arc has been Knuckles wandering around the desert. He’s still there. Locke and Sabre look on grimly, as Knuckles uses his newly-discovered and still not understood powers to magically summon a portal back to Echidnopolis. His father and granddad worry that Knuckles could become another Enerjak. (And he would, in about 145 issues.) Knuckles’ growing mystical power isn’t something that interests me. The grave decisions the Brotherhood has to make really do not interest me. Still, Locke promise to gather the guardians together suggests that this lingering subplot tumor might actually go somewhere in the near future. That would be a nice change.

I like to see Knuckles and his friends working together, kicking ass. This is why “The Dark Legion” mini-series was the previous high water mark for the “Knuckles” solo book. Penders was so invested in Knuckles’ mystical side that he’s actually become a detriment to his own book. Removing him from the equation allowed the Chaotix to go on an action packed adventure. Though “The Chaotix Caper” was still hampered by the writer’s inability to create a smooth plot, at least it had a great start and a fun conclusion. That counts for something. [7/10]

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 61

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 61
Publication Date: May 1998

Just as Mike Gallagher previously returned to his much unloved Horizont-Al and Verti-Cal concept, the same writer revisited another favorite creation of his in issue 61. Unlike the gravitationally challenged twins, the Downunda Freedom Fighters arguably deserve more love. Considering one of the points of the post-“Endgame” story arc is Sonic and Tails exploring their world, traveling back to Downunda even makes sense. Despite the Australia inspired characters getting the front cover, there are two other stories in issue 61.

The poorly titled “Outback Gut Check” begins with Guru Emu and Wombat Stu in a cage, surrounded by angry platypuses. Luckily, Sonic, Tails, and the other Downunda Freedom Fighters arrive to rescue them. Except for Duck Bill, that is. Apparently the platypus went power mad following Crocbot’s defeat in “Endgame” and led a revolt among his species against the other Fighters. Now, Sonic and the rest have to figure out what’s up.

You never really know what you’re getting when Mike Gallagher’s name is on the script. Though he’s delivered mini-epics like the “Mecha Madness” saga, even his best work has a goofy streak. “Outback Gut Check” is not Gallagher’s proudest moment. The story follows a dull construction. Sonic and the gang rescue Guru and Stu, Walt Wallabe explains what’s up, the heroes have another encounter with the hostile platypus on a river, before they wander into Bill’s headquarters. The reveal is disappointing as well. Turns out, Crocbot is behind it. He slipped a mind-control chip on Bill’s head at some point. Crocbot’s disembodied torso has been delivering orders to the platypus ever since. That’s a sloppy explanation. It also doesn’t explain how Bill successfully rallied the other platypuses into revolution.

The emotional heart of the story, how the other Downunda Freedom Fighters feel about Bill’s betrayal, is shoved into the margins of the story. The other element of heart involves Barby and Tails’ growing feelings for each other. Many fans find the romance between Tails and the much older Barby to be gross, Ian Flynn among them. It’s never bothered me. Sonic and his friends are all technically kids anyway. Tails has always acted a lot older than his canonical eleven years too. Besides, Barby’s affection is never anything more than some hugs and kisses. It’s more cute than anything else. If the series actually allowed its characters to grow up, Tails and Barby could’ve had a serious relationship in a few years. Though potentially interesting, this aspect of the story occupies a few word bubbles at best.

Another problem with “Outback Gut Check” is the artwork. Long time inker Harvey Mercadoocasio draws this story. Harvo’s art has varied in the past from awful to passable. Issue 61 is also not one of his better days. The characters are gangly, angular and pot-bellied. The character’s limbs are often out of proportion with the rest of their body. Harvo frequently draws Barby with a body befitting a human female, instead of a furry creature. The platypus gang gets it the worst, all of them looking like indistinct blobs of bills, beaver tails, and jagged bodies. Even the colors are ugly, blurred and washed-out.

The first of the two back-up stories also focuses on Sonic and Tails’ travels around Mobius. In “Total Turbulence,” the Winged Victory runs into a rough storm cloud… That just happens to be control by Ixis Naugus. Though the sorcerer attempts to scuttle the heroes with the turbulent weather, Sonic and Tails survive by flying the plane right into his face. That’s it.

What purpose does this story serve? Mostly, it’s to remind us that Ixis Naugus is still out there. Sonic’s’ journey around the world was technically about tracking the wizard. Admittedly, this hasn’t come up much recently. Considering Sonic and Tails will be fighting the wizard again in two issues, Bollers probably felt it necessary to remind us of his existence.

The other reason this brief four pager ran was to introduce us to Steven Butler. Butler would become the regular illustrator of the book for a while after this. While not everyone is a fan, I’ve always loved Butler’s work. He had a grasp on the character’s designs while bringing his own style to it. There was also a certain gritty, sexy quality to his work that I like. That isn’t shown off to much in this story. Truthfully, Naugus looks pretty silly. However, the four-pager does show off how good Butler is at action and dynamic frame layout.

The last story continues the “Tales of the Freedom Fighters” back-up. After nearly getting blown up by a still lingering Robotnik trap, Geoffrey St. John’s partner Fleming tells him he’s ready to retire. Geoffrey decides to round up a new team. He travels to the Floating Island and recruits a chameleon, finds Wombat Stu in Downunda, and recruits Hershey the Cat from his own office.

I wish more insight into St. John’s choices were made. Valdez the Chameleon isn’t even named in this story. He doesn’t get a proper introduction, appearing in two whole panels. Why Stu is chosen boils down to St. John liking his youth. Considering Downunda is in a transitional state, you’d think he would want to stick around. Hershey doesn’t even get that much. It’s kind of a bummer of a story. At least Art Mawhinney’s art is nice.

All of the above combine to make issue 61 underwhelming. [5/10]

Knuckles the Echidna: Issue 14

Knuckles the Echidna: Issue 14
Publication Date: May 1998

After an excellent first issue, the “Chaotix Caper” story arc stumbles significantly in its second part. Issue 14 of “Knuckles” suffers from the same problem that has plagued many of the series’ stories. It tries to do too much, juggling too many storylines and concepts. The juggling not only distracts the reader from the captivating mystery the last issue was built on but it also prevents the plot from building up a decent momentum.

For example: Issue 14 splits its time between five or six different plots. While the rest of the Chaotix recover from the Lemonade Sunshine Dandelion dosing they received last issue, Julie-Su and Constable Remington attempt to track down the center of the conspiracy. Meanwhile, Renfield T. Rat and Ebony Hare argue about how much of the drug the rat should be slipping into Happyland’s food. Around the same time, the Chaotix begin to wake up in the hospital. The psychedelic effects of the drug has Charmy Bee reflecting on his recent life choices. Furthermore, Locke and Sabre continue to spy on Knuckles as he journeys back home to the island. ALSO, Harry and General Stryker have a meeting in his cab.

This is probably Ken Penders’ biggest problem, more so than his wooden dialogue or tendency towards self-adsorbed myth making. Most comic writers see a story arc as something akin to a TV episode. The arc can build on what came before, and add more to the world, but it should also be satisfying as an individual entity. Penders, meanwhile, sees his comic series as a very long, convoluted novel, always on-going and never truly ending. Dozens, maybe hundreds, of storylines are happening simultaneously. As a writer, he’s constantly juggling the different threads, making sure none of them fall too far behind the others. Instead of saying “Maybe I should save some of this shit for another time and focus on the pertinent information,” he has to keep all the plates in the air constantly. As exhausting as it is to read, I bet it’s more exhausting to write.

What’s most disappointing about issue 14 is how the crime story escalates. Julie-Su and Constable Remington do not come across as competent detectives. They head over the Happyland, asks Renfield T. Rodent some questions, and then leave. Since the amusement park is obviously the center of the poisonings, you’d think they’d investigate more thoroughly. As the constable of Echidnopolis’ police force, Remington should have various services at his disposal, to aide the investigation. Instead, he talks Harry into driving them over to Ebony Hare’s warehouse. There, Julie-Su finagles her way into a conversation with the bad guy. Hare immediately recognizes her as a narc and tosses her off the building’s roof, leading to our cliffhanger.

Instead of digging up evidence, our heroes bumble around desperately, cluelessly grasping at leads. It’s not satisfying to read. It makes Julie-Su and the Constable look like idiots. Mostly, it creates the impression that Penders was making shit up as he went along.

Also weirdly incompetent: The criminal conspiracy the story revolves around. Ebony Hare and Renfield T. Rodent are working together. Hare supplies the drug and Renfield laces the park’s food with it. How this benefits either of their operations isn’t clear to the reader. Why would Renfield want to poison his customer base? How does Hare profit from such an arrangement? Is the Mobian L.S.D. addictive, making the entire scheme a way to hook the island’s kids on drugs? Like Joe Pesci in "Moonwalker?" If so, that isn’t clearly explained either. The two can’t even agree on anything. A good portion of issue 14 is devoted to them arguing and fighting among themselves.

Probably the best part of issue 14 doesn’t focus on the poisoning conspiracy at all. The first part of “The Chaotix Caper” ended with Charmy embarking on a bad, psychedelic trip. Here, we get a glimpse into his memories. The backstories of the Chaotix are still undefined, so that’s fertile ground worth exploring. We discover that Charmy Bee is actually a prince of his local bee colony. Shaken by the responsibilities of being royalty, he flew away from home, eventually landing on the Floating Island.

Considering Charmy Bee has always been the most care-free and childish of the Chaotix, this information certainly characterizes his behavior in a new context. It also reveals why the death of Mello, his only friend in his old life, affected him so deeply. Manny Galan’s illustrations of Charmy’s flashbacks are appropriately creepy. (All of this is certainly more interesting than the slapstick comedy of the Chaotix waking up in the hospital.)

Since this is a “Knuckles” comic, the titular character is contractually obligated to appear. In the desert, a gang of bear bikers ride pass Knuckles. Even though they don't appear to be bothering him, he still spins into a cyclone, tossing the bikers into the air. Locke and Sabre watch, intoning gravely about Knuckles’ growing power.

The Brotherhood of Guardians stuff is always a bore. These few pages foreshadow one of the lamest aspects of Knuckles’ adventures. Yes, the Guardian has some great powers and a great destiny to go along with it. We’re going to spend the next eighteen issues of his solo series (and then some) hearing about it. As always, if Locke would just tell his son what the hell is going on, it would save everyone a lot of trouble. This stuff is lame on a good day and more so during a story where we’re more invested in what Julie-Su and the Chaotix are doing.

None of this mentions Harry’s encounter with General Stryker, which doesn’t contribute to the main plot in any way. It’s frustrating because issue 13 was easily my favorite issue of Knuckles’ solo series thus far. Maybe Ken can tie it all together for a compelling finale. But I kind of doubt it. [5/10]

Sonic Super Special: Issue 5 - Sonic Kids

Sonic Super Special: Issue 5 – Sonic Kids
Publication Date: April 1998

Readers who grew up in the late eighties or early nineties may remember “Muppet Babies.” Spun off from a sequence in “The Muppets Take Manhattan” which showed Jim Henson’s famous felt creatures as toddlers, the show was a big hit. Big enough that other studios tried to spin their own properties into “baby” versions. That’s how we got “Flintstone Kids,” “Tiny Toon Adventures,” “A Pup Named Scooby-Doo,” “Tom and Jerry Kids,” “Jungle Cubs,” and even “James Bond Jr.!” Archie Comics might have pioneered this kind of thing with “Little Archie,” which has been published in various forms since the sixties. Considering all of the above, maybe “Sonic Kids” was an inevitability. Despite the gimmicky concept, the two Sonic Super Specials devoted to this concept are actually fairly well regarded.

The first story, “When You and I Were Young, Sally,” was written by Mike Gallagher and illustrated by Manny Galan. As kids, Rosie raised the future Freedom Fighters in Knothole. Tails is feeling insecure about his lack of special abilities, especially when compared to Sonic’s super-speed. Sonic gives the young fox the idea to spin his tails like a helicopter, defying logic and sailing into the sky. Being new at this, Tails quickly looses control of his new abilities. The gang track him to a hollowed-out tree stump and the cave below. That’s right. This story is the secret origin of Tails’ flying ability, his nick-name, and the future location of Freedom HQ. Accordingly, it ends with Sally naming the group the Freedom Fighters and deciding to battle Robotnik’s regime.

The above description probably makes the story sound really trite and silly. It’s actually surprisingly good, though. The Freedom Fighters don’t act like the heroes they are now. Instead, they’re kids. Sonic shows off and brags. (So, you know, not too much has changed.) Though a pretty serious kid, Sally is still happy to play when Julayla gives her permission. Rotor uses big words, as if he’s trying to impress his friends with his big brain. There are also cute nods to future history. “Boomer” is revealed to be a childhood nickname of Rotor’s. Sally, in as diplomatic a fashion as possible, acknowledges that Antoine wouldn’t be useful for a while. Though an energetic kid, Sonic is still willing to help out his pal, by encouraging Tails. The story concluding with the discovery of the future Freedom HQ and the team taking a vow to fight tyranny is satisfying.

It’s cute but not syrupy. It sets up future events but isn’t overly self-referential. It’s fun without being goofy. In other words, it’s one of the best things Mike Gallagher has ever written for this series. Unlike his uneven work in issue 60, Manny Galan’s artwork is very good here. The “kid” designs look like younger versions of the character we’re used too. Their cuteness is not overly emphasized. Galan’s expressive faces also really help this story out, since it’s mostly about the kids reacting to the world in the hyped-up, exaggerated way kids do.

The second story continues the “kids” theme. The embarrassingly entitled “Stop… Sonic Time!” was written by Karl Bollers and drawn by Art Mawhinney. In the present day, Sonic regales a group of kids with the story of how Tails got his sneakers. The flashback starts on Tails’ birthday. Sonic rushes into Robotropolis and buys a specialized pair of sneakers from a shifty individual, who readers may recognize as Tails’ uncle Merlin. Around the same time, Robotnik deploys a new weapon, a beam that can freeze time. He targets a random patch of the Great Forest, sending in soldiers to capture the frozen denizens. Sonic, being out of town, avoided the weapon’s range. So it’s up to him to save the day.

“Stop… Sonic Time!” feels a lot like a left-over “SatAM” script. A time freezing ray definitely seems like something Robotnik would have cooked up on that show. The long-forgotten Cluck even puts in an appearance. Sonic’s role in the story as a smart-ass hero who uses his cunning as much as his speed to defeat the villain recalls his characterization on that show. Sonic’s strategy involves him pretending to be frozen, being brought into Robotnik’s HQ, yanking on the villain’s mustache and getting the SWATBots to blow up the bad guy’s own device. Aside from a few comic-exclusive concepts, such as Merlin Prower or Crabmeat as Robotnik’s number one toady, this easily feels like it could’ve aired on ABC back in the day.

Furthering this feeling is Art Mawhinney’s pencils. Whahinney, of course, started out as a storyboard artist for the cartoon and, even this far into the book’s existence, he maintained that connection. The young versions of the Freedom Fighters look especially adorable in Mawhinney’s already cartoon-like style. He even manages to make Tails’ feet not look monstrously weird! Having said that, Art occasionally goes a little off-model. His Crabmeat looks more like an actual crab than a robotic facsimile.

The last story in the book doesn’t feature younger versions of the main cast, though it continues the theme of “memory.” In “Total Re: Genesis,” Sonic, Sally, and Antoine have barely survived a confrontation with the last remaining ComBot, which suddenly activated. As Uncle Chuck asks for a report on what happened, each Freedom Fighter gives their recollection of the events that just transpired. Each character’s version varies wildly from the other. Finally, using Nicole’s previously unmentioned satellite hook-up, Uncle Chuck observes the objective version of the truth. In other words, this is the Sonic version of Akira Kurosawa’s classic “Rashomon,” a reference the readership for this book surely understood.

What’s really cool about “Total Re: Genesis” is that it gives us a peak into each of the character’s heads. In Sally’s version of events, she’s extra confident. While her teammates are knocked unconscious, she stays in the action, defeating the robot with her quick thinking and enduring toughness. Antoine’s version has him as a dashing hero, single-handedly taking down the robot with his swashbuckling skills. When Sonic recalls things, he’s portrayed as a pun-sweeping action hero. He effortlessly defeats the villain with his super abilities, cracking lame jokes all the while. The objective truth shows that each of these stories are slightly true and, ultimately, teamwork is what took the bad guy down. This is a nice way to show us that the characters truly do depend one each other. The individual memories give us a concise idea of everyone’s personality. It’s a fun read.

A defining gimmick for “Total Re: Genesis” is that each memory is drawn by a different artist. Newcomer Nelson Rebeiro handles the framing device. I wonder if Nelson Rebeiro and Nelson Ortega are actually the same person, as their styles are very similar. The artwork is moody and features heads and hands that are slightly exaggerated. Yet it’s also consistent, with a good sense of motion. Sally’s flashback is drawn by Art Mawhinney. Mawhinney’s work is typically excellent though, it must be said, his ComBot looks a little blocky and uninspired.

Sam Maxwell draws Antoine’s flashback. Maxwell is an acquired taste, as his work is extremely expressionistic, frequently approaching action scenes from off-beat angles. I’m on record as being a fan and his work here is pretty great. I especially like his use of shadows, which emphasizes how melodramatic Antoine’s recollection is. Sonic’s flashback is drawn by John Herbert, last seen in issue 54 and credited as John Hebert here. Herbert’s action is a little stiff and his Sonic looks a little goofy. Yet his detailed ComBot is awfully creepy. Rebeiro returns for the epilogue, drawing most of it as a hyper-contrasted “hologram.” Though undeniably a gimmick, I like the different artists approach and it helps bolster a fun story.

“Sonic Kids” might be the best of the Sonic Super Specials thus far. It doesn’t have the plot holes or overdone writting of “Battle Royal” and “Return of the King.” While there’s nothing here matching the emotion of “Brave New World,” the artwork is much, much better. In other words, Archie managed to turn a potentially awful idea into a pretty solid comic book! Cherish moments like this because they didn’t happen very often. [8/10]