TailsTube #1 (Feat. Sonic!)

TailsTube #1 (Feat. Sonic!)

Original Release Date: March 24th, 2022

The time has finally come for me to reckon with the concept of VTubers. I'll admit, the idea of people becoming extremely famous and successful simply from broadcasting footage of themselves playing video games and talking to fans is an idea that baffles me. "Streamer" or "YouTuber" is, without a doubt, a legitimate career path in this day and age. People will send you money simply because they enjoy watching you play "Fortnite" or whatever for hours on end! Weird! The idea of YouTubers as a common place piece of entertainment is so common that the internet, more recently, had to invent the idea of a Virtual YouTuber. As in a Live Streamer or YouYuber that does all the things an ordinary YouTuber would do but instead behind the computer generated mask of a digital character. It's the promise of immersive online games like Second Life or World of Warcraft taken further, allowing people another avenue through which to explore a life other than their own via the power of the internet. 

That's magical, allowing folks who would ordinarily never have the chance to become beloved or successful. It's also extremely weird. Spending your life watching shadows on a screen puppet other shadows, to the point that they might seem more real than your flesh and blood reality proves that Plato was one hundred percent right two thousand years ago. The internet being the beast it is means that most VTubers take the shape of sexy anime girls, even those openly played by men. It also means that the VTuber community is full of drama and in-fighting, a perhaps inevitable extension of every space human beings create. I find this entire phenomenon extremely weird. How we are expected to commodify every mundane aspect of our personal lives. How we have replaced real celebrities with reality show celebrities, begetting internet celebrities, climaxing in the creation of public personalities and tastemakers who operate behind another, deeper layer of artificiality. How these graven images seem designed to replace real people we admire in our own lives, replace our own faces, until everything is covered by a shiny, digitally perfected sheen of un-reality. These big tiddy waifus are our new gods and they will someday blot out the glow of the sun, humanity retreating further into our caves to worship these idols with their massive eyes, tiny mouths, and pointy chins. This is why the only VTuber I watch is Vulo. 

Isn't it great how this "Sonic the Hedgehog" blog has become a place for me to reflect on how technology and late stage capitalism pushes us ever further towards the void? Anyway, why did I begin this rambling dissertation? VTubers have become such a common aspect of internet life that parodies and commercialized recreations of the format quickly sprang up. Yes, another degree of fakeness has been added to this already excruciatingly fake style of communication, the discussions being scripted before hand, the talking heads being played by actors, and the broadcast usually being created to shill a product. In March of 2022, an on-going series would launch on the official "Sonic the Hedgehog" YouTube channel called "TailsTube." These short animations use the visual signifiers of a VTuber – though I doubt they actually use motion capture rigs to animate them – to present the premise of the series: That you are watching an in-universe broadcast from Tails himself, as he answers questions from viewers and talks to his other famous friends. It's basically a fake talk show starring "Sonic" characters, the staggering evolution of the "interview fanfic" format that plagued websites two decades ago. 

Being an overly analytical dweeb, the mere set-up for "TailsTube" raises several questions in my brain. This suggests that some sort of equivalent to the modern internet exists in Sonic's world. That there are direct parallels to services like YouTube, Twitch and Twitter, where people can post and communicate with each other. Does this mean the residents of Sonic's world have smart phones? What wireless carrier does Shadow the Hedgehog use? The visual set-up for "TailsTube" resembles the little handheld computer Tails carries everywhere while the questions are clearly meant to be other established characters from this universe, seemingly operating from their own social media accounts. If cell phones exist on Sonic's world, who mines the lithium for the batteries that power them? How are payments processed in a universe seemingly without banks or currency? Is HedgehogNet a free service put out into the world by the Restoration? Where does the coal that burns that powers the towers that broadcast these electronic signals into the air come from??? I thought you guys were about protecting the planet, not exploiting it!!! 

Anyway, despite presenting more questions than it is prepared to answer, "TailsTube" seems to essentially be a program design to answer common fan questions about Sonic's universe in some sort of official capacity, not totally dissimilar to Ian Flynn's podcast. Flynn and other ascended fans like Tyson Hesse and Aaron Webber seemingly have some sort of hand in writing the program, which also includes explicit references to the events of IDW's comic book. In other words, "TailsTube" is another symptom of the in-mates taking over the asylum. It is a way for Flynn and his story team to bring a more defined degree of concrete continuity to Sonic's world as it exists in the games. Working towards a grander, united theory of blue hedgehog history. The kind of thing the suits at Sega and Sonic Team probably can't be bothered to care about but the obsessive fans of this franchise are extremely curious about. 

All of this means that "TailsTube" occupies some weird grey zone between an animated series, a podcast, a FAQs column, and – considering the episodes are sporadically uploaded usually when Sega has a new game to promote and never run longer than a few minutes – a commercial. Does a program like this warrant me writing long, detailed reviews for each one? Probably not! However, if I acknowledged "Sonic Mania Adventures" and the other little animations uploaded to YouTube by the official channel, I figure I should at least write about these things in some capacity. Whether or not I review each individual episode of "TailsTube" or handle them in bundles depends on how much information and character interactions each one contains. These truly aren't TV episodes but I figure I can find something to say about them. 

The first episode of "TailsTube" has Mr. Miles Prower interviewing his best blue bro, Sonic. They answer questions about the geography of this planet, the origins of the Chaos Emeralds, and what exactly the nature of Sonic's relationship to Amy Rose is. The questions seem to be from Dodon Pa, Tangle, Rouge, and the head of the Sonic Fan Club, furthering the connection between the games and the comics. The episode lays out a few nuggets of new or otherwise obscure bits of lore: Sonic's world is made up of continents, mostly occupied by humans, while thousands of islands populate the ocean and are mostly habitated by the furry animals. Tails is specifically from West Side Island. This seems to blend the world as presented in "Sonic Unleashed" with how it's presented in much of the rest of the games. We also learn that the marble patterns and loops of the landscape are totally natural, Amy is definitely just a friend, nobody actually knew the origins of the Chaos Emeralds at this time, and Sonic drives a race car sometimes because he thinks it's cool. 

This is all somewhat interesting background information. The most intriguing element revealed here is the idea that human civilization and the communities that Sonic and his friends live in are separate aspects of the same world. Does this suggest that modern cities, not all that different from Earth as we know, exist juuuust off-screen from the rolling hills and simple huts Sonic and the others live in? I don't find this to be an especially satisfying answer, as it implies that there's a massive and largely unexplored population and civilization out there that is, I guess, imperiled every time Eggman tries to conquer the world. It strikes me as a somewhat contrived way to justify the very different versions of Sonic's world as presented in the classic games and the comics versus the world as presented in the "Adventure" games, "Unleashed," and "Sonic '06." Sonic Team is still struggling to justify Sonic being presented as an animal out in the wilderness in most of the games versus the urban creature integrated with humanity as presented in the modern games. I suppose this is a better answer than shrugging your shoulders and saying "I guess there are two worlds???" 

This does present what is maybe "TailsTube's" most significant contribution to overall "Sonic" lore. No, I'm not referring to a long lingering world-building question that finally got resolved. As much as this fandom absolutely loves to argue about depictions of Sonic, his friends, their world, and powers in some futile quest to prove what the "real" Sonic is, that's a lot less important than something else: Who is this purpled haired lady? While discussing human society, Tails flashes an image of some of the people from "Sonic Unleashed" on-screen. Standing in the back is an adult woman with bouncy pink-ish/purple-ish curls, smoky eyeshadow, an orange hair clip, and wearing a military or scientific jump suit of some sort. Nobody knows who this character is. Since "Sonic" fans fucking love new characters, people immediately began to speculate endlessly about who this chick was. Was this a teaser of a new cast member to be introduced in the then-upcoming "Sonic Frontiers" or some other piece of "Sonic" media? Would she be an ally or an enemy? Did this indicate that humans would play a bigger role in the plot of the new game or whatever?

When asked on Twitter about Pink Haired Woman, Ian Flynn simply said "#KnowingSmile," his stock response when he can neither confirm nor deny anything but it'll probably be important later... Well, it's been two years and we haven't seen Pink Haired Woman since. The second only acknowledgement of her existence has been a split second cameo in the "Sonic the Hedgehog 3" trailer, seeming to confirm that she exists only as an in-joke at this point. My theory is that she was a rejected human character designed for "Sonic Unleashed" or maybe a future game at some point that never made it out of development. One can assume that her image was quite deliberately included in this cartoon but the fact that Sega has never done anything with her in all this time certainly seems to suggest this was a big fat ol' nothing of a teaser. Fan artists on the internet being who they are, and this mystery woman being the size of an average human mother, has led to a lot artwork of her being exactly what you'd expect. I doubt Sega has any plans for this design in the future – casting Pink Haired Woman into the same strata of "Sonic" apocrypha as Tiara Boobowski or Madonna – so that amount of R34 this one image generated is its greatest legacy at the moment. Maybe the comic will pay homage to her some day...

As for the rest of "TailsTube #1," what can be said about it? The question about the Chaos Emeralds, Sonic and Amy's relationship, and his use of race cars sometimes basically get non-answers. Sonic refuses to admit Amy Rose is anything but a friend, while acknowledging that she was his "number one fan" but is now a valued member of the team. Tails admits the Chaos Emeralds' true origins are unknown while pointing out some of the crazy shit they can do as plot devices. (Obviously, this was Flynn testing the waters on providing a more definitive background for the Chaos Emeralds that he would in "Sonic Frontiers.") I do think it is cute that, instead of merely answering these questions, these are presented as queries from Derpon Pew and Rouge in their own extremely self-serving ways. 

As for a piece of four minute long entertainment, "TailsTube #1" offers a little bit to a viewer. The simple animation is cute. The design of Tails' desktop features plenty of cute little in-jokes for fans, which are also present in the sound effects and musical cues. That Roger Craig Smith and Colleen O'Shaughnessy lend their voices to this short certainly makes it feel more like a "real" piece of "Sonic" media. These two have lived with these characters for so long now, that they can slip into these personalities so smoothly. It feels a lot like you are hanging out with friends, which is obviously the entire point of the VTuber format. I guess Sonic Team co-opting that to make these corporate mascots feel more "real" is weird. But I'm long used to having creepy quasi-parasocial relationships with these cartoon characters, so it doesn't set off my red flags any. I like the little interaction between them about sunglasses. Otherwise, this is certainly a thing that exists. I doubt I'll have as much to say about the future ones but I'll guess I'll watch them too. [6/10]