Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 91

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 91
Publication Date: November 2000

After the exhausting lows of “Naugus Games,” even a marginally shitty story comes off as a lot better. I’ve previously lauded Karl Boller’s ability to mix action and character beats. As the comic creeps closer to issue 100, the writer’s balance was off. Issue 91 is too slow, the characters stuck in stasis thanks to a plot that seems to be moving towards no particular goal.

Rotor waddles back into Mobotropolis, after his failed attempt to rescue his family. He find the city taken by evil once more and currently being shook by meteors falling on it. He runs into Mina and Sonic, who easily survived the impact. Inside, Dr. Robotnik plays with the Sword of Acorn before loosing the MacGuffin to Uma Arachnis, who takes it back to Kodos. Meanwhile, Sonic’s trip back towards Eggman’s stronghold is interrupted by what was hiding inside those meteors.

Issue 91’s cover story, unimaginatively entitled “Crash!,” develops the series’ plot lines just enough to classify as a plot. The biggest deal is that Rotor returns to Knothole. His arrival is greeted with little fanfare. He waddles into town, runs into Sonic and Mina, and is escorted back to Knothole. The guy has been gone so long that he doesn’t even know Eggman has taken up residence in Robotropolis. His reaction isn’t horror or shock but bored resignation. You’d think he’d be a little more upset. Then again, maybe loosing his family again has made him numb.

For a comic bearing his name, Sonic does very little in this issue. He reveals how he survived last month’s seemingly final cliffhanger. He simply spun fast enough to burrow under the ground, safely escaping the blast. That’s an underwhelming conclusion, one that’s a little cheesy. He decides he’s going to get the Sword of Acorn back before Eggman uses Uncle Chuck and other Robians as a shield. He then races back out of the city, making no further attempt to get the sword back. It’s lame.

The reader reacts to the other plot developments as unenthusiastic as Rotor does. Eggman, stupidly, drops the Sword of Acorn and leaves the room. This allows Uma Arachanis to swoop down and pick it up, taking it to Kodos. The shuttles Bollers foreshadowed all the way back in issue 78 finally arrive in Mobius. Who cares about any of this shit, these desperate attempts to set up future stories? What’s mildly interesting is that Uncle Chuck has regained his freedom of choice. He’s hiding as a subservient Robian, acting as a spy within Robotropolis. In other words, Bollers has reinstated the status qua from “SatAM,” a plot outline the comic outgrew long ago.

Even the attempts at emotional pathos, which Karl is usually better at, hit like a wet fart. Sally and Elias spend a few panels angsting over their dad’s newly gained paralysis. Nate Morgan makes a dramatic entrance, for some reason. Dr. Quack and Nate suggests Sally and the Queen have some mother/daughter time. Honestly, there’s been so much drama among the Acorns lately that it’s hard for the reader to care. The Queen is barely a character and the King’s ill health doesn’t register.

Atop all these other indignities, there’s some shitty Ron Lim art. Lim flat out does not know how to draw these characters. Rotor is a pink oval, with a stubby head and floppy flipper arms. Robotnik similarly resembles a rubber bouncy ball. Sonic and Mina has a serious case of noodle arms. Sally and Queen Alicia look identical. Nate Morgan gains a massive head. Geoffrey St. John looks likes like something out of a Sunday comic stripe. Lim, for some reason, regularly zooms in on everyone’s faces… Which only draws more attention to how off-model everyone is. It’s shit.

The back-up story is only marginally better. The echidnas of Albion have recruited Nack and Nic the Weasels to hunt down Knuckles. With his massive chaos powers, the echidna has gone rogue. Fearful of what he may do with his uncontrollable powers, Gala-La hopes the weasels can track him down. The Guardian himself has no idea what the limit of his new abilities are but heads back to the Floating Island anyway.

Jesus Christ, Ken, what the hell is wrong with you? We want to know what happened to Julie-Su and the Chaotix! We want to get back to the Floating Island! Instead, the writer continues to jerk us around. It seems he cares so little about the residents of the Island, about Knuckles’ concern for his friends and loved ones, that the Guardian only appears on one page in this story. Instead, most of the story is spent setting up Nack and Nic, showing off their relationship, her new ship, and the objective Albion sets before them. It’s kind of cute. Nack and Nic have some nice brother/sister interplay. But it’s just another distraction from what we’re really concerned with.

At least the artwork is nice. Steven Butler’s work is handsome, as always. The opening scene, of Nack hanging out in a bar, hitting on a slutty blonde, are nicely colorful. Butler even manages to bring some curves to Nic, a previously shapeless character. Knuckles is miscolored, his natural red instead of radioactive green, but the panels of him meditating and flexing sure look cool. The interior of Albion is detailed. About the only complaint I have is the odd decision concerning Nic’s new ship. It’s the Millennium Falcon, barely redesigned and re-colored. That makes two issues in a row where Archie has stolen a ship design from a well-known sci-fi series. What’s up with that?

In conclusion, issue 91 is an uninspired way to wrap up the year 2000. The plot is getting sloppier, the writers are getting careless, and the artwork is getting shittier. Along with a new millennium, something far darker had dawned. The distinction is clear. The Dork Age has begun. [5/10]