Sonic X, Episode 2.23: The Beginning of the End

Sonic X, Episode 2.23: The Beginning of the End 

Japanese Title: The Day the World Stood Still

Japanese Air Date: March 7th, 2004

U.S. Air Date: March 12th, 2005

After saving the world from the ignition of the Earth's Bellybutton, Sonic and friends have returned to what they do best: Mooching off their rich friend! Sonic is running around the world, performing random acts of heroism, while his friends just chill at Chris' mansion. But an ominous threat lurks on the horizon: The merger of Earth and Sonic's world is going to cause an apocalypse. The only solution is to use Chaos Control to separate the worlds again. Chris, who realizes this means he'll never see Sonic again, is sent into a panic. He hunts down Eggman, who he is convinced is responsible for this latest impending disaster. 

Before we go any further into this review, I have to unpack the completely nonsensical threat this episode presents. The idea that Earth and Sonic's world being Chaos Controlled together would have unforeseen, disastrous consequences seems reasonable enough. Even if Sonic just teleported a big chunk of land into the water around Station Square, that would probably wreak havoc on the local ecosystem. If he really did fuse the two worlds, all sorts of crazy shit can be expected to happen. But this is not the approach the episode takes. Instead, a scientist named Chaco Bankissy – who has the slightly less insane name of Kim Bickley in the dub – delivers a rambling explanation that the separate time frames the two planets existed in will cancel each other out and will cause time to "die." I don't really understand what any of that means but I'm pretty sure physics doesn't back it up. 

Moreover, nobody really explains what time "dying" means. Does it mean the Earth will stop rotating around the sun? Does it mean our progression into the future will freeze, and we'll be stuck living the same day, like "Groundhog Day?" Does it mean all movement across the universe will slowly come to a stop? And how will two worlds being fused do that? No answer is provided. Instead, the threat of time "dying" is just an excuse for the show to be forced to separate the two worlds. It's a way for the series to build towards a series finale, of Sonic and his friends being returned home. But I think the writers probably could've cooked up something less inexplicable and vague than this. 

The upcoming apocalypse is really just a plot device, to set up what this episode is really about: Chris Thorndyke being forced to reckon with the fact that Sonic will be going home soon. In an early scene, the boy is writing some sort of school essay, asking him to envision what he wants for his future. All he can think of is being with Sonic. Chris has built his entire personality around his (largely one-sided) friendship with Sonic. Just the idea of Sonic leaving Earth forever sends the boy into an ego death spiral that causes him to do something reckless: Walk right into the base of a villain that has tried to kill him multiple times. 

I knew Chris' attachment to Sonic was unhealthy but this episode shows that it's much worse than I previously thought. Chris has pinned his entire self-worth on his friendship with Sonic. If the hedgehog is gone, the boy might as well not exist. This is how badly his absentee parents have fucked him up. Chris knows his parents don't love him, because they're never around. (Ella notes, at the cook-out early in the episode, that this is the first time the entire family has been together in a year.) Sonic is also never around – he's barely in this episode – but at least he occasionally nods in Chris' general direction. That acknowledgement is the only thing keeping Chris going. This is a kid with no confidence or sense of self at all, unless Sonic is with him. What a supremely fucked-up human being and he's not even a teenager yet. I feel bad for him.

And what is the solution to Chris's mental breakdown? After Eggman left them for dead last time, Decoe and Bocoe have turned their backs on their creator. Now they work for the Thorndykes, as some form of community service in response to the crimes they presumably committed while employed by Eggman. (This causes me to imagine hilarious meetings between the robots and their parole officers.) Chris finds the bots, they perform a wacky transformation to summon Bukkon, who leads them to the hut Eggman now lives in. After the villain tells the boy he's not responsible for the upcoming disaster, he tells him he's being selfish and threatens to beat him with a ruler. Somehow, this causes Chris to return home, hug his parents, and decide everything will be alright. I really feel like Eggman's advice would make things worst though! Like I said, this kid is going to be in therapy for the rest of his life. 

I've spent almost this whole review talking about Chris' deeply troubling neurosis but other things happen in this episode. We already know, from a previous episode, that Sonic has inspired people to make lifestyle changes. To work less and pursue what makes them happy. This trend now has a name: The Freedom Movement. And it's sweeping Station Square. This seems to amount to people wearing shirts that say "FREEDOM" and calling off work. So many of Nelson's employees have not been coming into work that he's put everyone on vacation for a whole month... Everybody except for Mr. Tanaka and Ella, I guess. But I suppose they do everything in the Thorndyke Mansion because they love the family, right? 

And good for a Bezosian billionaire like Nelson Thorndyke to give everyone in his company a month of paid vacation. He can probably afford it. Not that a ruthless capitalist, who demands constant growth, would ever do this in real life. A month where no one works means a month of no profit generated, a concept that would probably turn Elon Musk grey. Mostly, I'm thinking of the workers who can't afford to just not work whenever they don't want to. What about Helen's dad, who worked himself to the bone to pay his daughter's medical bills? What does Amy, who is now working as a waitress in a cafe, think of this? Unless Sonic's free-wheeling attitude caused a massive change in society and government, from the top down, that puts the happiness of the individual human above corporate greed, the Freedom Movement is bullshit. It's just a bunch of rich folks on vacation, wearing t-shirts that were probably made in sweatshops. 

Anyway, sorry for the socialist rant. I do that sometimes. Hey, want to know a weird bit of trivia? According to this episode, Station Square is in Arizona. We know this because, during a scene starring Sam Speed, we see a freeway sign informing us that Station Square is ten miles outside of Flagstaff, 150 miles from Phoenix, and 265 miles away from Tucson. How this correlates with Station Square also being on a bay, as depicted in previous episodes, I don't know. Maybe, on the wacky "Sonic X" version of Earth, Arizona stretches all the way to the west coast. Or maybe someone built a massive man made lake out in the middle of the desert. Or maybe Sam Speed, the star of this scene, moved several states away from his sister when no one was looking and this scene isn't meant to take place in Station Square. Until we get some other proof, I'm going with the "enormous made made lake" theory.

That Sam Speed scene, by the way, is the sole action sequence in the episode. It involves the race car driver pursuing a Freedom Movement guy who is ignoring speed limits, which suggest there's more to this philosophy than what we see here. Anyway, Sonic swoops in to pluck the guy out of his sports car after he drives it off a bridge. Otherwise, this is a character-driven episode with lots of scenes of people just hanging out. Such as when Eggman attempts to prepare a meal – which looks like a burnt miniature tree trunk full of grape jello – for Bukkon. Why does a robot need to eat? Anyway, I enjoyed this one because I like to deconstruct Chris Thorndyke's psychological trauma but it's definitely kind of a weird one. [6/10]

Sonic X, Episode 2.22: The Volcanic Venture

Sonic X, Episode 2.22: The Volcanic Venture

Japanese Title: Sonic Versus the Underground Monster

Japanese Air Date: February 29th, 2004

U.S. Air Date: March 15th, 2005

"The Volcanic Venture" picks up right where "Sonic X" left off, with Sonic and the gang hanging out on the island above the Earth's Bellybutton. (A very silly phrase they use every two minutes in this episode.) Eggman and his robots have travelled inside the island's volcano. After Mr. Tanaka accidentally uncovers some Murasian treasure, the Sonic team becomes certain Murasia is inside the island. They take chase after Eggman and soon uncover an underground world. The place is full of danger, such as giant monsters and an impending volcanic explosion. 

The first half of this two-parter definitely felt like it stuck Sonic and friends into a story that didn't have much to do with them. This disconnect became really obvious in the second half, when the show turned into an extended fight between two sci-fi super-ships. "The Volcanic Venture" still feels like weird fanfiction, that randomly drops Sonic and the gang into an otherwise unrelated plot. Yet it does a slightly better job of blending the Sega crew with a traditional "lost world" story line. The usual "Sonic X" cast members are foreground more, even if the episode still largely plays like a wacky fusion of "Atragon" and "Journey to the Center of the Earth."

In fact, I suspect the hardcore "Sonic" video game fans probably really enjoy this episode. Largely because Sonic, Knuckles, and Rouge are the main characters in this time. A long portion of this episode is devoted to the three of them digging through the volcanic caverns to the hidden civilization underneath. We get some fun character interactions here. Like Sonic spin-dashing into a wall, only to be told that he really shouldn't do that in a volcanic. Or Knuckles impressing everyone by knowing what glow-in-the-dark moss is... Before the other two wander off in disinterest. Naturally, there's a lot of Rouge teasing and flirting with Knuckles too, which is always fun to watch. I especially like how Rouge has no plans to journey under the island before someone discovers a massive gemstone, after which she quickly changes her mind. That gag pays off in a funny way too, at the end. 

Also in my last review, I expressed some disappointment that "Sonic X" did a Toho homage without throwing in a kaiju. Well, I spoke too soon because this episode has two kaiju... Though maybe not the ones you are expecting. The "Atragon" homage does not extend to a Manda lookalike appearing. Nor does a Godzilla facsimile show up, though Bokkun does shatter a statue of a T-Rex at one point. Instead, TMS just straight-up put Mothra and Moguera (the giant robot from "The Mysterians") into this cartoon. They've been slightly redesigned but the similarities are blatant. Mothra — the data card calls her "Mothmacin" — only chases Decoe and Bocoe around but Moguera — renamed "Mongroun" — gets a complete action scene at the end. As a fellow monster movie nerd, it's fun when totally unexpected references like these crop up.

You'd think a giant, fire-breathing robot covered in drills — this show really likes drills — would be enough to raise the stakes here. Yet "Sonic Versus the Underground Monster" also builds a time limit into its story. Ya see, the volcano nearly the entire episode takes place inside of is about to go off any minute now. The heroes have to stop Eggman's plot to trigger a chain reaction that will destroy the world, fight off Toho's 17th most popular monster, and get out this place before the entire thing explodes. Normally, a set-up like this would create a hell of a lot of suspense...

But this is "Sonic X" we're watching, so most of the episode is played for goofy comedy. Eggman does clarifies that he does indeed intend to destroy the surface world but he seems pretty casual about it. At one point, he calmly asks his robot minions to get him some lunch, while just typing away on this laptop. That leads to a goofy scene of Becoe and Docoe foraging for food, considering eating a slug, and mistaking Mothra's antenna for a massive apple. The robotic duo gets most of the laughs here, such as an inspired gag when they attempt to combine into a giant super-robot. Or their seemingly final deaths at the end being quickly retconned. There's also a bizarre moment where Tanaka attempts to have some alone time with Topaz, before he karate chops a rock in two for no apparent reason. I'm going with the theory that Tanaka has an unrequited crush on Topaz and she's just too nice to tell him that busty bats are more her type.

Once again, the focus on silly comedy may have an ulterior motive as well. The previous episode featured some pretty smooth animation but I guess TMS couldn't scrounge up some extra money for this one. The fight with Moguera is pretty underwhelming. The robot is given a tiny mouth that he shoots fire out of, which looks seriously silly. In general, the robot moves in a loose, awkward fashion. Sonic and Rouge mostly spin-dash and screw kick the giant machine, resulting in repetitive scenes of spinning blurs colliding with the threat. There's also an odd scene, of Chris falling down a tunnel, that is animated in CGI for some reason. 

Still, despite some pretty apparent flaws, I enjoyed this one. I'm too much of a nerd not to get a kick out of an episode where Sonic fights a C-list giant monster. Again, it's funny and unexpected that "Sonic X" would go in this direction eventually. But why not? It's not like any of the previous "Sonic" cartoons didn't go in weird digressions that had nothing to do with the source material as well. It's pretty much a tradition at this point! This doesn't rank among the show's most entertaining half-hours but it's far from bad too. [6/10]

Sonic X, Episode 2.21: Map of Mayhem

Sonic X, Episode 2.21: Map of Mayhem

Japanese Title: The Great Decisive Battle at Latitude 0!

Japanese Air Date: February 22nd, 2004

U.S. Air Date: March 5th, 2005

Season two of "Sonic X" was mostly preoccupied with adapting several of the video games. With their version of the "Adventure" duo and "Sonic Battle" behind them, the show could've moved on to adapting "Sonic Heroes" or maybe the "Advance" games. (The third of which was about to come out a few months after this episode.) Instead, "Sonic X" decided to conclude season two by getting back to its true calling: Screwing around and sticking Sonic and friends into wacky adventures that don't have much to do with their usual antics. 

"Map of Mayhem" begins with a marine research vessel disappearing in a mysterious stretch of ocean called the Gran Pacific. Topaz is on the ship, because the vessel had some sort of connection with government documents. This causes the President to send Rouge to investigate. At the same time, Eggman has Decoe and Bocoe steal an ancient map from an archeologist called Dr. Atsumi. The map is connected to the lost continent of Murasia, who supposedly rearranged the world's continents millions of years ago by attacking a volcanic hotspot known as "the Earth's bellybutton." Sonic and friends investigate, teaming up with Atsumi and Knuckles. They soon uncover that Eggman is behind the disappearance and hopes to "stimulates the Earth's bellybutton." A huge, three-way battle between Eggman's new ship, Sonic and the gang, and a government super weapon reverse engineered from Eggman technology ensues over this pivotal location. 

"Map of Mayhem" is an unusually plot-heavy episode of "Sonic X," if you couldn't tell. That's because the writers are paying homage to some older media here. Not just to the "lost continent" subgenre, which has a long history of its own, but specifically to the sci-if films made by Toho in the 1960s. The plot most recalls the 1963 film, "Atragon." That film is about the surface world being attacked by a long lost, sunken civilization known as Mu. In America, "Atragon" is best known as the debut appearance of kaiju Manda. In Japan, the film seems better known for the Gotengo, its flying submarine outfitted with an enormous drill. This show already paid homage to the Gotengo, in the design of the Egg Fort. That design is brought back with the G.U.N. built third iteration. 

This is the most obvious callback but far from the only one. Dr. Atsumi is voiced by Kenji Sahara, who previously played a different character named Dr. Atsumi in Toho's 1957 alien invasion flick, "The Mysterians." The episode's Japanese title is presumably a shout-out to "Atragon's" quasi-sequel, "Latitude Zero." The shots of a group of cool dudes in matching, color-coordinated uniforms inside the GUN Fort's cockpit recalls both that film and any number of other tokusatsu shows. As a life-long Godzilla nerd, I immediately caught onto this because the episode's title card is based on the distinctive Toho production logo. Sonic doesn't fight a giant monster, not in this episode anyway, but there are a few other minor Toho in-jokes sprinkled throughout. 

Why "Sonic X" decided to pay homage to a bunch of movies that were forty years old at the time, I can only guess at. Presumably because the show runners like them. It's fair to say that old sci-fi movies don't have much to do with what we typically expect from the "Sonic" franchise though. The second half of the episode is devoted to a battle between Eggman's Giant-Makan, a high-tech vessel patterned after a pirate ship, and G.U.N.'s Gotengo knock-off. There's lots of lovingly animated scenes of the ships' various weaponry, like the laser cannons oars or a missile launcher shaped like the cylinder of a revolver. (This stands in contrast to some other, character-based scenes, which feature some janky, off-model animation.) The X-Tornado is prominently featured in several scenes as well. Once again, you get the impression that the people making this cartoon really wished they were working on a mecha show instead. 

As for what Sonic and the gang get to do among all the pyrotechnics, it's not much. Sonic's fear of water is referenced throughout, with Chris even jumping overboard to save him at one point. Later, Sonic does a special combo move with Knuckles, which seems a little weird and out of place. Topaz is in the episode strictly so Rouge can save her later on. The shock and surprise she displays upon learning Topaz is being held captive – which results in a guy holding her at gun point and Rouge launching herself out of the torpedo bay – once again supports the idea that these two are a little more than just work buddies. In fact, I think this subplot was included strictly to counteract that bit where Mr. Tanaka gave Topaz a necklace two episodes ago. Rouge and Topaz are gay lovers and you're never going to convince me otherwise.

Here's another episode that contrasts Eggman's wacky antics with an utterly apocalyptic scheme. His plot this week, after all, is to stimulate the Earth's g-spot "bellybutton," in order to cause massive squirting volcanic activity. This will presumably rearrange the continents again and kill millions of people. Oh, that wacky Eggman! Always plotting mass murder! This convoluted plot does reveal some interesting things about "Sonic X's" setting. Ya know, I've been saying all along that this show is set on Earth and I guess it is... But it's definitely not our Earth. Not just because everything's goofy and places like Station Square and Murasia exist. Throughout this episode, we repeatedly see a map of the planet and the continents do not begin to match the ones that actually exist. I'm sure no one really thought it through but this does seem to be an explicit admission that the show takes place in an alternate universe fantasy world

Despite some grim implications to the bad guy's machinations, there's lots of oddball comedy in this episode. Eggman impersonates Dr. Atsumi, including his hair. There's a couple of casual forth wall breaks and some Japanese word play. After Chris leaps into the water, Tanaka takes his shirt off, ties it to his head, and tries to follow suit. Bocoe and Decoe dress up as mummies for steal Atsumi's map. They then encounter Knuckles and only loose him after running into... Well, I guess it's a night club or something. But the front of the building is shaped liked a woman's face and it's full of busty ladies in belly dancing outfits, so something sexy is happening here. The next scene has Bocoe and Decoe covered in kisses, so I can only assume these two robots got laid. (It should not surprise you to learn this gag was cut from the dub.) 

It is, if nothing else, a memorable episode. Dropping these characters into a plot stolen from an old sci-if movies results in a story that doesn't feel especially "Sonic"-y. (Though I guess it's no more or less out-of-left-field than every other piece of "Sonic" tie-in media that existed up to this point.) Unlike the best episodes of "Sonic X," it doesn't explore the unexpected ramifications of the blue hedgehog and his buddies crash-landing on a planet similar to our Earth. Yet it's still a reasonably entertaining half-hour of animated nonsense. [7/10] 

Sonic X, Episode 2.20: A Wild Win

Sonic X, Episode 2.20: A Wild Win

Japanese Title: Sonic Battle: Finale!!

Japanese Air Date: February 15th, 2004

U.S. Air Date: February 26th, 2005

Instead of picking up the far more exciting plot point of Sonic chasing after Eggman, the last part of the "Sonic Battle" story arc begins by focusing on the martial arts tournament. The episode quickly progress through a series of matches before coming to the final fight: Knuckles vs. Emerl. The robot's abilities to copy his opponent's moves makes him an ideal match for Knuckles, who quickly relents to the beating he receives. As Emerl is handed the red Chaos Emerald, his electronic brain is overwhelmed. The formally kind robot gains red eyes and proceeds to attack everyone violently. Sonic, Knuckles, and Rouge can't stop him and he's soon tearing the city apart. That's when a very unexpected hero emerges with the perfect strategy to stop the rampaging machine. 

As I've mentioned in the past, tournament arcs are often done to pad out the episode counts of long-running shonen fighting anime. (Usually so the manga can produce more material for the show to adapt.) This means the story lines usually go on for a decent number of episodes. "Sonic X," meanwhile, squeezes an entire fighting tournament into two episodes. "A Wild Win" crams six matches into its opening minutes, before a relatively short final battle occurs.

Admittedly, I have to admire the show for speeding through the match-ups, as I really didn't want to watch an endless series of fight scenes anyway. Yet I mostly came away from the first half of this episode thinking how disappointing a tournament this must have been for audiences to watch. Has there ever been a martial arts tournament before where so many matches end without actual fighting? Or where one opponent just randomly decides to give up? In this episode alone, Chris decides he doesn't want to fight Amy or Rouge in the finals, so he fakes a belly ache against Knuckles. Mr. Stewart forfeits his fight against Lucky, when Scarlet Garcia recognizes him from the "Sonic Adventure 2" subplot. When Lucky is suppose to fight Emerl, the bell-shaped robot just collapses from a sprained ankle or something. I guess Emerl learned to copy Lucky's luckiness? How the hell is that suppose to work? This follows the previous episode, where half the fights ended in boring forfeits or ring-outs.

The semi-final fight is one of the few actual showdowns the tournament presents us with. But the audience in the stadium is denied even the satisfaction of getting to see that. Perhaps remembering that Knuckles beat her the last time they fought, Rouge demands a handicap. (She uses the excuse of being a delicate female, which I can't believe anybody bought considering they've all seen Rouge tear robots to pieces.) Knuckles agrees to fight Rouge in a black-out tent, where the night vision equipped bat will have an advantage... Which means the people watching live see none of the actual fight! They just hear Knuckles and Rouge tumbling around in the dark, grunting at each other. They could be having rough sex in there, for all we know. Considering Rouge emerges, battered and bruised but feeling confident before collapsing from exhaustion, I'm choosing to believe that is exactly what happened. Honestly, if I had paid an exorbitant ticket price to watch this fight, I'd be asking for a refund. 

Of course, there's a reason "Sonic X" rushes through all of this shit: The episode isn't actually about the fighting tournament. Instead, Emerl holding the Chaos Emerald, going insane, and attacking the city is much more important. Not that this plot point is especially well done either. Emerl's ability to copy fighting techniques is believable enough to make him a match for Knuckles, who is not a master tactician anyway. Yet the machine immediately reducing Station Square to rubble is a little hard to believe. We see buildings devastated and the streets inundated with rubble. One little robot did all that?! Nobody thought to call in the military or anything? Station Square just got destroyed by Perfect Chaos not that long ago, so it really feels like the show seriously inflates Emerl's destructive capabilities in a desperate attempt to make the little guy seem like a serious threat. 

Actually, I'm not sure if the show runners wanted us to take Emerl seriously as a villain or not. Because he's defeated by a pre-schooler. Yes, Cream summons the strength to stand up to her former robotic friend. And she doesn't do it by making a declaration of love or an emotional plea from the heart. It looks like it's going to go in that direction but, nope, Cream just beats the shit out of him. There is no "crayon breaky Willow" speech. Instead, Cream touches on the strategy of having Cheese leap in front of Emerl's face whenever he's ready to copy Cream's ability, interrupting the process. The other characters interpret this as "Emerl can't copy more than one person at a time," even though he did exactly that earlier in the episode. 

It's a pretty ridiculous ending for a number of reasons. Sure, Cream and Cheese destroyed countless Eggman machines in "Sonic Advance 2." But this cartoon has portrayed her as nothing but a harmless, even petulant little child. Having her suddenly swing into action hero mode – defeating a foe in a few minutes that Sonic, Knuckles, and Rouge all struggled with – strains believability. I also can't believe that literally no one besides the tiny child thought of disrupting Emerl's scanning abilities before this point. It seems like a fairly obvious solution to me! Or, like, Tails and Chuck could've designed a computer virus and infected Emerl from afar with a drone. Or the government could've just dropped a bomb on him. How are you going to copy a bomb's special move? Anything would've been better than having a cute little bunny punch the murder-bot in the face until he fell into the ocean.

Or, maybe, Emerl's love for Cream could've overpowered whatever ancient mayhem protocol the Chaos Emerald activates. (Rouge crudely wonders if this is the case, by asking if Emerl "likes little girl." I can't tell if that's a pedo joke or just an unfortunate translation choice.) But I don't think this would've been dramatically satisfying either. Because we don't actually care about Cream and Emerl's relationship. Emerl has done almost nothing since being introduced a few episodes ago. His bond with Cream has been talked about more than it's actually been shown. How many scenes have they even had together before this episode? "Sonic Battle: Finale!!" certainly packs in the melodramatic emotion. Emerl cries motor oil as he sinks into the ocean and Cream weeps after he explodes. Yet I have zero emotional investment in these two's relationship, so none of this stuff hits home at all.

There might have been another reason why most of the fight scenes in this episode either occur off-screen or conclude without actual violence: The animator had neither the time, resources, budget, ability, or interest in making the fight scenes look decent. In the back half of the episode, there's far too many scenes of Emerl turning into a spinning tornado and rushing at our heroes. There's in general quite a lot of repetition, frames of people rushing back and forth around their opponent being repeated. A shot later, of Sonic balancing on his toes as he stands at the dock, looks especially shitty. I guess this show isn't like "Dragon Ball Z," when they can just save money in fight scenes by spending three episodes on someone charging up an attack.

By the way, Eggman – who has almost nothing to do in this episode – casually mentions that Emerl is made from ancient technology. This is a callback to the "Sonic Battle" video game, where Emerl was built by some mysterious, long-since-gone civilization. Yet it's definitely pretty sloppy that they mention his origins in an off-hand manner like this instead of, ya know, actually depicting it on-screen. I'm sure, "Sonic" fans being the particularly passionate people they are, that Emerl is someone's favorite character. But I've never thought he was that interesting and this pretty half-assed episode reinforces that belief. After a fun start, the "Sonic Battle" two-parter ends in spectacularly shitty fashion. [4/10]

Sonic X, Episode 2.19: Prize Fights

Sonic X, Episode 2.19: Prize Fights

Japanese Title: Sonic Battle: Opening!!

Japanese Air Date: February 8th, 2004

U.S. Air Date: February 19th, 2005

After a bit of build-up, we have finally arrived at the official adaptation of "Sonic Battle." Sort of. "Sonic X" completely abandons the game's plot in favor of its own wacky premise. The government is concerned about Eggman, now out of prison and up to no good. They decide to hold a public martial arts tournament, with Sonic, Knuckles, and Rouge all being forced to participate. The prize is an honest-to-god Chaos Emerald. It's all a ploy to lure the mad scientist out into the open. The tournament is opened to the public, with most of Sonic's friends successfully entering into the competition. Much shenanigans ensue. 

In the history of action anime, there's no story more commonplace than the tournament arc. Since so many shonen shows revolve around fighting or competition, it's natural and almost obligatory to include a tournament eventually. It's a simple premise that allows the writers to take it easy for a bit, putting pure plot aside in favor of bouncing colorful characters off of each other. It gives an excuse to let good guys grapple it out or to showcase the skills of supporting characters. It's also often used as filler for this exact same reason. Whether you find this more-fighting, less-story set-up entertaining or tedious is entirely a matter of personal taste. 

"Sonic X," being the show it is, completely refuses to play by the usual rules of the tournament arc. Instead of showcasing popular "Sonic" cast members, like the Chaotix or Shadow, most of the fights are made up of random side characters. Was anyone begging to see Sam Speed and Mr. Stewart fight it out? Characters I had forgotten about, like Lucky and Hawk, are reintroduced here. Unsurprisingly, this show plays this premise less for action and more for absurdist comedy. Many of the fights are totally farcical. Ella chases Big the Cat around the ring, a scene so silly even 4Kids decided it had to be cut. Sam gets disqualified for tackling Mr. Stewart before the bell rings. Bocoe and Decoe are ready to have an epic judo match when the cops show up and declare them wanted fugitives. 

The show lacks so much commitment to the fight-driven premise that most of the showdowns end with someone nonviolently conceding. Ella refuses to fight Emerl. Mr. Tanaka charms Topaz into surrendering with some jewelry. (Which is bullshit, as we all know Topaz only has eyes for Rouge.) Rouge rings-out Tails by stunning him with a peck on the cheek. Chuck doesn't even get a chance to fight Lucky, because his back goes out while training. Which is pretty funny. In fact, I laughed a lot during this episode. Such as when everyone plays on an otherwise uninterested Knuckles' fragile masculine ego to convince him to enter the competition, essentially guilting him into fighting. Or when Amy debates whether it's right for a young lady like her to show-off her violent side before absolutely annihilating Bokkun with her hammer. 

Of course, I really have to question how any of this is legal. There doesn't seem to be any rules determining who could enter this tournament, or what equipment they could use. Looking at the contestants, you could've potentially had ordinary citizens – including an elderly man or a rotund middle-age woman – fighting against alien superheroes or robots. One of the contestants wears a full suit of armor and Amy uses her hammer, while everyone else is unarmed. Was there any guidelines preventing someone from just bringing a machine gun into the ring and gunning down their opponent? And then we have to consider that several of the fighters are literal children. Having someone like Tails – a fox from another planet with various special abilities – fight an adult like Hawk is one thing. But forcing Chris and Danny, grade schoolers, to wrestle for the public's entertainment or Chris to grapple his own father is unethical, at best, and completely sadistic at worst. 

Yeah, that's right, Chris fights his own dad here. The show plays the match-up for comedy, obviously. Chris defeats his father in minutes and largely off-screen, seemingly pinning him with a leg lock. I suspect Nelson let the boy win. Yet I can't help but imagine how this match-up will further exacerbate the kid's growing Daddy Issues. You can easily imagine him, years later, telling a therapist about the time it sure seemed like his dad was willing to beat his ass in front of millions of people. Then again, Chris' psychological issues are already manifesting. He tricks Danny by acting like he's unwilling to fight a friend, before pinning the other boy quickly. Later, Chris confesses to Sonic that he's tired of being perceived as a child and a "good kid." Obviously, Chris' abandonment issues have left him unable to trust people and questioning his own identity. He's a good thing he's rich and will be able to afford the years of therapy it's going to take to unravel all this shit. 

There are certain political ramifications to consider here, as well. And I'm not even talking about the U.S. government sponsoring a prepubescent fight club in an elaborate, poorly thought out scheme to catch a wanted fugitive. The very first match of the tournament features the President of the United States boxing a regular citizen. Absolutely any outcome to this scenario is going to be a P.R. disaster. Since the President is a doughy old white guy in boxing gloves and trunks and his opponent is someone wearing a suit of medieval armor, Christina Cooper throws in the towel before the leader of the free world is beaten to death. Such a display of cowardice and weakness is definitely not going to play well in the red states! I'm just going to assume President Michael K. is a Republican, because I sure as fuck can't imagine a Democrat ever stripping down and stepping into the ring for some fisticuffs. He's pretty annoyed that he doesn't get to fight. Which seems all too probable in a post-Trump world, where childish macho dumb-assery was a regular event in the Oval Office. (By the way, the Black Knight – nary a flesh wound in sight – turns out to be someone with a personal grudge against the President. I feel like the Secret Service wouldn't have allowed any of this to happen!)

Man, I'm trying to imagine the intense disappointment seven-year-old "Sonic" fans watching this for the first time in 2005 must have felt. The premise makes it seem like we're going to get awesome brawls between Sonic and Knuckles. Instead, the only fight that isn't a massive joke is Tails flailing Hawk, a fat guy with a salad bowl haircut, around the ring. I can see why the U.S. dub didn't include the "Sonic Battle" connection that's in the Japanese title. Not only is this nothing like the game but Gemerl does very little in this episode. The robot continues to have no personality at all and the show has done little of the work needed to make us invested in its bond with Cream. 

The only thing here that I can imagine really pleasing fans is some more gratuitous SonAmy ship-teasing. Sonic and Amy are scheduled to fight. Both are obviously reluctant to do anything and debate how this is going to go... Before Eggman swoops in, fires a laser, and Sonic saves Amy's life. He leaps after the villain, leaving the ring and forfeiting the match. Amy, of course, takes all of this as a sign of the hedgehog's undying love for her. It plays off the opening scene, where she was going through some existential angst over whether or not Sonic would ever acknowledge his feelings for her. The "X" version of Sonic definitely has feelings for Amy but her increasingly maudlin obsession with him is starting to get tiring. Can she go back to being crazy? That's more fun. 

This is definitely a very dumb episode of "Sonic X" but it's so weird and messed-up that I still really enjoyed it. The combination of Japan's surreal sense of humor and these cutesy characters has led to so much unexpected shit. I hope the rest of this story arc is just as demented as this episode was. [7/10]

Sonic the Hedgehog (IDW): Issue 48

Sonic the Hedgehog (IDW): Issue 48

Publication Date: February 23rd, 2022

We are dangerously close to the fiftieth issue of IDW's "Sonic the Hedgehog," showing that the quote-unquote new "Sonic" comic may at least have some of the legs of the old one. (Though we'll see if this book is still running in nineteen years.) While the Archie series was doing a four-parter at this point that was originally meant to act as the series finale, IDW's "Sonic" is playing things a little more loosely. There's obviously some sort of master plan and presumably the events of the "Imposter Syndrome" mini-series will play a role. But the main book is devoting an issue to some side characters and mostly playing it for laughs. I guess Flynn and Evan Stanley have different ideas about what makes an anniversary issue than, uh, Ken Penders.

There's no actual title seemingly listed for this issue's story but Jon Grey's (still overly busy but admittedly not hideous) film noir inspired cover features the words "Chaotix Confidential Presents... Villains with Filthy Faces." So I'm going with that. Anyway, we begin with Vector and Espio retrieving Charmy from the KTBR radio station for some reason. Nite the DJ gives them a tip that Central City is experiencing all sorts of electrical disruptions. The Chaotix investigate and soon come across... Rough and Tumble, who are smuggling weapons for Clutch the Opossum. 

It's a running joke throughout the "Sonic" franchise at this point that the Chaotix are not the best detectives. They were depicted as complete nincompoops in "Sonic X." The Archie comics had them getting results more through blind luck than actual detective-ing, while never getting paid for their work. This is inspired by their similar constant lack-of-funds in the games. The IDW comic, meanwhile, has made the bold decision to depict the Chaotix as... Fairly competent? This version of Vector has repeatedly been shown to be a reasonable leader and strategist and even an empathetic listener. Here, he actually asks appropriate questions of witnesses, follows clues, and is cool under pressure. Espio successfully sneaks into Clutch's warehouse later and even Charmy proves useful.

Now, the Chaotix are still not great detectives. A degree of luck is definitely still a factor in this story. The only reason they're able to track down Clutch's waterfront base of operation is because Tumble drops the piece of crate containing the address. The heroes never actually find the villains responsible for the power outages, instead uncovering a totally unrelated criminal operation. Yet compared to the completely farcical depiction in "Sonic X," this is a pretty big step-up. I would consider hiring these guys to, I don't know, hunt down my adulterous lover or whatever it is private investigators actually do in real life. 

Despite all of that, I would still characterize this as a light-hearted issue. And a pretty funny one too. Charmy's status as the team's kid produces a couple of chuckles. Such as the way he immediately falls asleep in Vector's arms after enthusiastically co-hosting a radio show all night. Later, he's even drawn in a bumblebee stripped booster seat, which is adorable. The direct way the trio deals with traffic or the eccentrics that come out when they start asking questions are amusing. There's some amusing banter between the heroes, especially when slinking around the sewers. The funniest moment occurs when Rough and Tumble's traditional pre-battle rhymes prompts Vector to counter with his own rap, which brings out the music critic in the bigger skunk. 

Evan Stanley has shown that cute dialogue is a strength if her's, so I'm not surprised it's a highlight here. Another trademark of hers is an interest in expanding the comic's supporting cast. This issue features the return of some minor players. Nite the Owl and Don the Rooster show up at the beginning mostly because it's clear the writer just wanted to include them. Meanwhile, Clutch the Possum officially graduates from Chao-abusing asshole to crime boss. We find out he used to be a weapons smuggler and is eager to get back into the game. He opens fire on Espio and nearly outsmarts the Chaotix at one point. Considering the obvious care that was taken with his design, I'm not surprised Clutch returned. I'm happy to see the comic's rogue gallery expand a little more. 

Comedy and light-hearted character interaction is, I think, the main goal of this issue. But that doesn't mean there isn't some decent action here too. Instead of just piling on the fisticuffs, the way some recent issues have, this one nicely builds to a big action sequence. The rumble kicks off with Clutch nearly shooting Espio with his nifty cane gun. Vector burst down the door and grapples with the skunks, using his fists and tail. The way the crocodile defeats the villain's plan is nicely direct too. Everyone involved definitely had some fun designing these action scenes.

They're well-drawn too. Aaron Hammerstrom provides the pencils this time and he continues to distinguish himself as one of the best artists IDW has on this series. Those action scenes are really dynamic, with a real sense of motion as Vector and the others take swings at each other. There's also some nicely moody panels. While chasing after him in the sewer, Rough is mostly depicted as a shadowy silhouette, which is a nice touch. Reggie Graham did the colors and they deserve a lot of credit too. The panel of the Chaotix approaching the docks at sundown is beautifully. 

Of course, Surge and Kit never actually appearing in this issue does bring with it a minor problem. Starline's master plan is still playing out and, the closer we get to the end of that particular plot, the more underwhelmed I am by it. Surge and Kit's big acts of villainy are to... Cause traffic jams? Damage the city's electric grid? These are, no doubt, criminal acts. But I would say the effect on people is more inconvenient than full-on life threatening. I'm increasingly feeling like the hype behind the Imposters was misplaced. Aside from starting that forest fire, I've been pretty underwhelmed by their actions as bad guys thus far. None of this is the fault of Evan Stanley's writing and instead speaks to my problems with the IDW comic's overall approach to its post-Zombot world. 

I think the real reason I really liked this issue is because of how well-paced it is. It quickly sucks us in, keeps the story rolling along at a fast rate, features some twists, an exciting climax, and wraps everything up within the span of one issue. I can't remember the last time a regular installment of this book — not one of the specials — told such a complete story in one issue. They should do this more often! "Chaotix Confidential" or "Villains With Filthy Faces" or whatever you want to call it is overall a delightful read. [7/10]

Sonic X, Episode 2.18: Sewer Search

Sonic X, Episode 2.18: Sewer Search

Japanese Title: The Ridiculous Epic Spy Operation

Japanese Air Date: February 1st, 2004

U.S. Air Date: February 12th, 2005

"Sonic X" continues to be in a goofy mood with the eighteenth episode of season two. The President is concerned about Eggman having escaped prison. He sends Rouge and Topaz on a special mission to find him. Mr. Stewart has also been deployed on this mission. Chris and his friends randomly meet Cream, Cheese, and Emerl at school. Upon seeing Mr. Stewart, all the kids decide to follow him around. The group soon stumbled across Eggman, who is literally buying books in a used book store. They follow him to his sewer lair and shenanigans ensue. Meanwhile, Chuck assigns Sonic to go find Chris, who didn't arrive at school today. 

Yes, this has to rank among the sillier episodes of this very silly television program. I guess it technically moves the overall plot forward: Emerl continues to lurk around in the background, the show periodically reminding us of his ability to copy special moves. All in preparation of that forthcoming "Sonic Battles" adaptation. It's also established that Eggman has set up a new base below the streets of Station Square, like he's a Ninja Turtle or something. Also, that he's planning some new evil deed. But otherwise, this is a loose, screwball installment devoted to the characters shirking responsibilities and going on wacky adventures that have little impact on the rest of the series. 

The thing that is most amusing about this episode is the reveal that... Mr. Stewart is actually a good spy? Let me explain. The kids come across their former teacher pressing a stethoscope to a tree. He suspects Bocoe and Decoe are hiding inside, which seems ridiculous. Except he's totally right. Later, he uses the same device to uncover the location of Eggman's new hideout. When he's captured by the bad guy, and they dump his briefcase full of spy shit on the floor, Eggman dismisses it. Surely, nobody as unassuming and buffoonish as this guy could be an actual intelligence agent. Being unassuming and unsuspected are, in fact, the qualities that make a good spy. (And not so much transforming robot cars, though he has one of those too.) Mr. Stewart is still kind of a dumb-ass — he drives his car down a flight of stairs and imperils the children in his backseat — but in this show's goofy world, he's still pretty good at his job. 

Another thing I like about this episode is that there are multiple scenes of characters just hanging out together and being silly. After Stewart's hideous compact car turns into a boat and cruises into the sewers, a lizard jumps into the backseat. This freaks out Danny, who has an apparent phobia of all things creepy and crawly. Helen thinks the lizard is cool though. In fact, she loves animals like that and is even seen, in flashback, cuddling a spiny caterpillar. He insists that's weird, she fires back that he's unmanly, and I come away thinking both of these kids are more interesting than I previously did. I like it when characters, especially children, are given specific personality quirks. 

This is also an episode strangely fixated on desserts. Maybe because most of it takes place in a sewer, which presumably stinks of human feces. After an extensive recap of the last episode, we are greeted to a very serious scene of the President giving Rouge and Topaz their mission. This comically contrasts with Rouge and Topaz deciding to, instead, spend the afternoon at a fancy restaurant, enjoying some gourmet ice cream. Later, multiple characters tempt and confuse Bokkun by mentioning Ella's apple pie and strawberry cake. Later, the heroes catch the explosion-obsessed robot in their house, eating said desserts. Maybe Ella is just really chill when someone asks to cook for them, maybe she distracted herself from being worried about Chris by baking, or maybe Bokkun threatened to blow her up if she didn't serve him. 

Even though it's a light-hearted episode that isn't that important to the lore, TMS still decided to include some of that super smooth action animation they occasionally toss our way. After successfully making it though one giant gate, Eggman attacks Chris and friends with the Egg Spider. That's a giant arachnid-themed mech of his. Sonic appears just in time to fight the machine. We are then treated to some nice shots of the hedgehog running towards the machine, spin-dashing some limbs, and head butting it. It looks great. I wish the whole show looked this good. 

Despite the spiffy animation, it's notable that Sonic does almost nothing in this episode. He spends most of it off-screen, aimlessly running the city in search of Chris. Immediately after attacking the Egg Spider, he's pinned to the wall. Maybe his most notable action occurs in flashback, when Chris asks himself what he thinks of Eggman and Sonic says he doesn't care. Rouge saves him and it's up to Emerl to finish off Eggman's newest weapon. Again, I just think it's funny that the first season depicted Sonic as this neigh unstoppable hero that could bulldoze pretty much any of Eggman's robots, unless they were powered by a Chaos Emerald. Season two, meanwhile, has shown him repeatedly getting defeated by far less powerful threats. Has Eggman gotten better or is Sonic just worn out? Or is the show just trying to convince us that Emerl is a total bad-ass and sacrificing Sonic's skill level for it? You decide! 

Anyway, it's a pretty dumb episode. After defeating Eggman, everyone just leaves his new lair without exploring further. But I still enjoyed this because, I guess, I'm wrapped up in this show's stupid sense of humor. I did not expect "Sonic X" to be endearingly quirky but here we are. [6/10]