Sonic X: Issue 4

Sonic X: Issue 4
Publication Date: December 2005

Archie's original plan was to simply grant the “Sonic X” comic four issues, as a test run mini-series, and take it from there. Apparently, the reaction to the book was so overwhelmingly positive that “Sonic X” got the green light for an on-going series before even hitting number four.  This one ends with a preview with a fifth issue, showing that this was a done deal by now. So it looks like we'll be going faster-faster-fucking-fucking-faster for a while now.

Picking up where we left off last time, issue four's “Boisterous Bot Battle!” has Sonic and his friends cornered by Eggman's quartet of kill-bots in the air/space museum. Before smashing them, Sonic is informed that his human friends are inside the machines. They are being forced to pilot the robotic executioners. So the hedgehog has to think on his feet, finding some other way to topple his arch-enemy's latest villainous scheme. Luckily, he's got some people backing him up.

As covered last time, Dr. Eggman's latest act of villainy is a little more devious than his first two tries. I just wish the book handled it a little better. Several panels are devoted to Chris Thorndyke, inside the robotic shell, being forced to attack his close friend. His dialogue balloons talk a lot about how upsetting this is for him without really showing it. Later, Chris somehow manages to disobey the mechanical straps controlling him, allowing Sonic a chance to escape. How he pulled this off isn't expounded on. Moreover, we never get a peak at how the other unwilling pilots are feeling about this. If anything, the President seems to be relishing his chance to attack Sonic, judging by his catty dialogue.

Then again, I have to remind myself that “Sonic X” isn't meant to be taken entirely seriously. This issue makes it clear that writer Joe Edkin mostly saw this comic as a chance to tell goofy jokes. Some of these work better then others. Eggman informing his henchman that he built his latest robots just by robbing the local hardware store is amusing. Rouge flirting with Knuckles after his sudden arrival, only for Amy to remind her that now isn't the time for such things, is a cute gag. However, “Boisterous Bot Battle!” is a little heavy on the goofy puns. The heroes quote  “Grease” in one scene, for some reason. Topaz' evil robot constantly sings ho-down songs while attacking the heroes. The constant quibs really undermine any dramatic tension in these scenes.

The action, over all, isn't much to write about. “Boisterous Bot Battle” continues to maintain the “Sonic X” formula with only one or two variation. Sonic and friends spend most of the book getting their asses kicked. The beating goes on for so long that the heroes' agony almost becomes comedic. There's really only one or two change of pace here. Sonic grabbing a power ring doesn't solve all his problems. Later, after a robot grabs Tails and takes to the skies, there's an airplane chase. Otherwise, it's business as usual. Robotnik's robots beat on Sonic for a while before he gets up the strength to smash 'em all. He then lets the bad guy get away, so the villain can scheme another day.

At least Joe Edkin finds a role for the whole crew in this story. Chris Thorndike and his grandpa play major roles in the story. Knuckles gets a few action beats, dodging a missile and riding in on an airplane. Rouge is bouncing around, contributing to the fight. Even Cream's chao, Cheese, gets in on the action. The little chao helps deactivate one of the robots, freeing the human inside. The “Sonic X” cast is still fairly small, compared to the cast of thousand in the main book, but it's nice to see Edkin do a decent job of balancing everyone's roles.

I've criticized Tom Smith 3's artwork as slightly flat in the past. It continues in that direction in issue four. These are the most inert action scenes to be featured in “Sonic X” so far. The characters are getting more simplistic. Far too much of this issue is composed of the robots grabbing somebody, shaking them around for a while, and starting over again. The air chase is especially lifeless. More and more, the backgrounds are nothing but single colors, contributing to the book's overall blah visual presentation. Smith's work is always competent but it's not very interesting.

I've been saying this the whole time but “Sonic X” is going to have to start shaking things up if it expects to hold my attention. How many times will field trips be interrupted by Eggman attacks? How many times will Sonic grab a Power Ring and save the day? Once again, I have to reiterate that it's not bad. It's just so simplistic that it borders on boring. One or two funny gags and the burning sexual tension between Rouge and Topaz is turning out to be the main reason to read this series. I doubt that'll be enough to sustain a forty issue run. [5/10]

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 157

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 157
Publication Date: December 2005

Do you see what's up ahead? It's the light at the end of the tunnel. Issue 157, in addition to ending a lousy year for the book, would begin head writer Ken Penders' final story arc for Archie's “Sonic the Hedgehog.” After wrapping up this story, Ken would leave Archie once and for all, allowing a new writer to come in and yank the series out of the creative rut it has been in for years. But we're not quite there just yet. Let's get through these next three issues together.

Even though he's only been gone for a few issues, Shadow's return to the comic is trumpeted on the cover. (I'm sure Sega's ill-conceived “Shadow the Hedgehog” video game coming out around the same time was a big factor in this decision.) The so-called ultimate life form feels drawn to a mysterious laboratory on the edge of Station Square. Inside, he finds a video of Doctor Gerald and a new version of Metal Sonic. The two synthetic hedgehogs wail on each other until they both collapse.

Ken's departure from the book, reportedly, was due to his frustration with Sega insisting he write stories featuring Shadow the Hedgehog. Maybe that reluctance might explain why “The Good, the Bad and the Unknown” and this story were so lame. The untitled cover story for issue 157 raises a bunch of underwhelming plot points. “Sonic Adventure 2” is reportedly part of Archie cannon, by this point. Despite this, Shadow is still shocked when the recording of Dr. Gerald informs him that he was created to take revenge on the government.

If Ken was hoping to give Shadow some development with this story, he squanders it by devoting the rest of the story to a fight with Metal Sonic. That's a thoroughly underwhelming spectacle too.  Shadow takes a rocket punch to the face. A Mega Man looking hand blaster is traded back and forth between the combatants. Liquid nitrogen and an electric live wire are utilized in unimpressive ways. The battle concludes with both fighters unconscious, making all five pages of this thing seem like a wasted endeavor.

In truth, the back-up story is actually the main drawl of this issue. “System Shutdown” begins with Robotnik, still in his bathrobe, getting a rude awakening. Someone has hacked into his computer system, threatening to completely take down his network. He's so concerned by this that he travels to Knothole, hoping to create a truce with Sonic. After the required fight, the hedgehog flies to Megatropolis, uncertain if he's entering a trap or not.

There's an interesting idea at the root of “System Shutdown.” Robotnik coming to Knothole as a diplomat, looking to forge a temporary partnership with the Kingdom of Acorn has potential. The book has bandied a similar concept around from time to time – such as in issue 19 – but never took it very seriously. Granted, I'm not very impressed with the panels devoting to Rotor and Tails standing back while Robotnik waltz into town. That seems unlikely. But the idea has merit.

Sadly, Ken doesn't exploit this premise for much. Instead, “System Shutdown” dissolves into one of the silliest fight scenes in the comic's history. Sonic rushes out at Eggman, only for the mad doctor to judo toss him to the ground. After some kung-fu posing, Robotnik even flips Sonic over his shoulder. This is ridiculous for a number of reason. Robotnik has never been a physical threat to Sonic, instead utilizing robotic devices and henchmen. Suddenly gifting the fat man with fighting prowess only baffles and annoys the reader. The justification for this sudden change – something to do with holograms – is equally awkward.

After the mandatory fisticuffs, Robotnik gets Sonic to work with him by promising to turn Jules organic again. This presents several issues, most of which is nitpicking, I'll admit. It's been established by this point that Jules can't be reverted to a flesh-and-blood state, because he'll die. Later, Eggman asks Jules if Uncle Chuck still feels guilty for “Helping him robotocize millions” and mentions how Sonic has been a thorn in his side for a decade. Hold on a minute, Ken. This Robotnik isn't the one that helped Chuck build the robotocizer. This Robotnik has only been feuding with Sonic since issue 75. That original Robotnik is still dead. I know this is the nerdiest type of pettifogging but you'd expect Ken – who has been working on the book nearly the whole time, after all – to keep track of these things.

That dramatic reveals that follow are hardly worth talking about. Once in Robotnik's city, Sonic, Rotor, and the others are attacked M, who has been seemingly taken over by some outside influence. At the end, she invites an army of Metal Sonics into Robotnik's lab. (They are drawn with the “Sonic Heroes” design, which is the closest this book would ever come to adapting that game.) There's some bullshit about the warning the doctor received having a twelve hour delay, which is a major ass pull. It's all a bunch of underdeveloped plot points crashing into each other, leaving the reader little reason to care.

The only real reason to read this one is for a handful of panels concerning Sonic's emotional state. Apparently, the boy has been staying up at night, strumming his guitar and pining for Princess Sally. This information almost justifies why Sonic has been behaving so badly lately. He's not screwing around with Fiona and Bunnie because he's horny. He's just trying to fill the void Sally left. There's two problems with this angle though. First off, Sally doesn't even appear in this story, making Sonic's situation seem rather one-sided. Secondly, Jules insists Bernie doesn't ask any questions. Because Ken just doesn't know how to write likable, honest parents that actually care for their kids.

Ron Lim draws the whole issue, by the way. He's showing some minor improvement. That fight between Shadow and Metal Sonic looks okay. But his work is still characterized by stiff movement and overly loose character work. As 2005 comes to a close, things are still sucking pretty bad. But the worst of it is behind us now so let's keep moving forward. [4/10]

Sonic X: Issue 3

Sonic X: Issue 3
Publication Date: November 2005

The third issue of Archie's “Sonic X” series raises some interesting questions. Part of the script takes place at an air/space museum. Tails mentions John Glenn, Neil Armstrong and the Lunar Module. This suggests that “Sonic X” takes place on our world or at least some place nearly identical to it. (If the original “Sonic X” cartoon covered this, please excuse my confusion.) On one hand, this makes the book slightly more interesting. The implication is that Sonic and friends are now part of a history that includes George Washington, Albert Einstein, Elvis Presley and Adolf Hitler, just to name a few. This is also disappointing because there's no way the comic is going to explore this at all.

I bring this up in the introduction because it's a tiny tidbit that in no way affects the rest of the issue's story. Instead, the joyfully entitled “Field Trip of DOOM!” concerns another Eggman plot. While Sonic is distracted hero-ing, Eggman sends booby trapped gifts to a number of the hedgehog's allies. A collection of new robots attack Sonic and friends while at the museum. Instead of being powered by animals, they're powered by people. Specifically, Sonic's friends, trapped by Eggman and forced against their will to attack Sonic.

Robotnik's previous plans in the “Sonic X” comic have been... Well, not great. They've mostly amounted to the mad scientist attacking a specific location – a bank, a sunken pirate wreck – with some sort of new animal-themed robot. His plan in “Field Trip of DOOM!” is practically identical. He sticks new life forms in robots and attack Sonic and pals while they're at a new location. But it does show a little more cunning than usual. By distracting Sonic with a standard fetch quest, and targeting the hedgehog's friends, it makes him seem like a more competent villain. It's a step forward.

The biggest problem with Joe Edkin's script is that it makes Sonic's acquaintances look like complete idiots. A robot – some little blue thing called Bokkun that I remember seeing in a lot of 4Kids' advertisements – comes to Sam Speed's door. Sam knows Bokkun is affiliated with Eggman but still accepts his gift of a new fuel injection system. The people who receive the gifts are Chris, Topaz, the President, and Thorndyke's school teacher Mr. Stuart. (Who is also a government agent, an info box informs us.) All of them accept the gifts without asking a single question. You'd think a known Eggman target, an active field agent, an undercover spy, and the fucking President would show a little more caution when accepting gifts.

The museum-set action sequence doesn't present much to write about. Tails and Amy participate in the battle, which presents one or two cute moment. Like when Tails attempts to dissemble the robots with his screwdriver. Amy gets some hammer time in. (Though Edkins still provides her with a thought balloon, expounding on her obsession with Sonic, showing how shallow his characterization of Amy is.) The action scene escalates to a fairly uninvolving chase. After some kids are shoveled into an armored truck, Sonic and Sam Speed take chase. Sam proves totally useless, driving his car off a cliff, while Sonic quickly rescues the kids.

However, I do kind of like the action sequence that opens the issue. As a distraction, Eggman has captured Cream's chao Cheese and placed him at the end of an obstacle course. As with everything else in this book, Sonic's constant quibbing keeps the stakes from getting very high. But this scene does feature some fun throwbacks to classic Sonic elements. He's chased by an orca, as in “Sonic Adventure.” Badniks like Buzzbombers and Relief appear. Sonic mentions the Green Hill Zone by name and sings his own theme song. (Sadly, it's the super lame “Sonic X” theme song, instead of the awesome SatAM theme song.) At the end, he leaps on a giant container and frees a bunch of cute animals. There's not much to it but it's catnip to classic Sonic nerds like myself.

Tim Smith 3 – the third entry in the Tim Smith franchise – continues to draws these. “Field Trip of DOOM!” shows some of Smith's limitations. Some of the action scenes are very flatly drawn, especially Sonic and Sam Speed's foot chase. His total adherence to the “Sonic X” cartoon house style produces some awkward results. Sonic in the opening scene looks a little funny. So does the President and Topaz in the a mid-book sequence. Still, Smith's work is almost stiflingly competent. It's good. Fine. But it doesn't really impress or linger in the memory.

Issue 3 of “Sonic X” ends on a cliff hanger, Sonic facing off against one of the robots containing his friends. Considering the series has been strictly episodic before this point, that's nice. I'm doubtful “Sonic X” will ever grow to a point of sophistication of Archie's main “Sonic” book but the series is showing a little more promise. Hopefully, it'll continue to improve, especially if I'm going to read all forty of these damn things. [6/10]

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 156

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 156
Publication Date: November 2005

How many times has Archie's “Sonic the Hedgehog” series threatened to marry Sally off? Issue 18 is the first example that comes to mind for me, where Sonic and Sally were drawn as husband and wife on the cover. Even that wasn't the first time, as the two were married in a fantasy sequence in issue 16. Considering alternate futures and that period where King Acorn was demanding Sally marry Antoine, the comic has constantly dangled the idea of marriage in front of our faces. Issue 156, despite its non-indicative cover, is doing yet another matrimonial fake-out. Probably not the last either.

Before the ink is even dry on the paperwork, Sally and Antoine are marching down the aisle. Sonic is seriously upset, certain something funny is going on. He crashes the ceremony. Some help from Elias keeps him from getting thrown out, the Prince accepting his right as King. Simultaneously, Anti-Antoine plans to kill King Acorn, completing his evil plan. Luckily, Sonic can see through the impostor Antoine's treachery.

Despite working on the book for over a decade, in this story, Ken is showing a total inability to grasp these characters. Even though they've been separated for a while, Sonic declares that Sally “should be with him.” Which paints our hero as possessive and entitled. Further misunderstanding Sonic, at the end he happily walks off with Fiona, a character he still has no connection with. (I also doubt that Sonic would willfully hurt his best friend, as Tails is clearly bothered by this relationship.) Sally, meanwhile, treats Sonic very coldly, even though she's also opposed to the wedding. It's just bad writing, you guys.

Once again, in a year as shitty as 2005, even a story arc as bad as “Line of Succession” presents some positive attributes. Evil Antoine emerges as a surprisingly ruthless villain. He revels in his villainy. During his wedding reception, he leaves just so he can deliver the killing blow to the king. He delights in throwing Sonic in the dungeon. When Elias appears to take the crown, he schemes to kill him in front of everyone. It's an old fashion style of villainy, very over-the-top, only missing the twirled mustache to be complete. But it entertains. Considering before this arc, he was just another generic member of Evil Sonic's gang, he proves a compelling nasty foe.

Perhaps more importantly, “Line of Succession” wraps up the entire impostor story line, almost as an afterthought. In the final pages, quickly, Sonic punches out Evil Antoine. He quickly surmises, somehow, that Antoine was replaced by his villainous double quite some time ago. Using the device Rotor built for him a few issues back, Sonic smoothly and easily returns the Bad Antoine to his world and the Good Antoine to Mobius. It's rushed and pretty sloppy but, considering the book had been stretching out this dumb story for a while now, nevertheless satisfying. Watching Evil Antoine get punched in the gut is also pretty satisfying.

Oh yeah, Prince Elias is back too. It's another example of how poor Penders' grasp on these characters is. (Which is especially ridiculous, considering he created Elias.) Elias' previous defining characteristic has been his unwillingness to rule. How many panels did he spend whining about not wanting to be king? I really didn't mind Elias hanging out on that farm, staying out of everyone's way and out of the comic's ongoing plot. Yet in this story, he rushes back to Knothole and, within a few minute, assumes the throne. I know he does it to save his sister but it still comes off as a rash decision, one at odds with his previously established personality.

In the back pages, Dulcy's solo story “The Price of Flames' continues. Even though the underground dragon city of Vesuvio is under attack by Robotnik's roboticized dragons, the community's leader still has time to punish Dulcy for returning. She's thrown in a lava bound pit, chained by her nose ring. One of the robot dragons collide with, breaking the chain and removing the nose ring. Her fire breathing ability renewed, Dulcy leads the attack against the robots, saving the day and being accepted back into the community.

“The Price of Flames” features some serious writing problems, which I'll address momentarily, but it remains a satisfying story. After spending all of last month on set-up, Mike Gallagher gets to the point here. Within a few pages, Dulcy faces the people who rejected her, regains her fire breathing abilities, saves the day, and redeems herself in her enemy's eyes. It doesn't leave much room for character development. The other dragons in Vesuvio are loose sketches, at best. But it is satisfying to see these events play out in such a neat fashion.

I'd probably give the story high marks if it wasn't for one serious problem. After regaining her fire breath, Dulcy incinerates the Robian dragons. She tearfully points out that these Robians were once normal dragons, brain-washed and roboticized by Robotnik. In other words, Dulcy just murdered her Mom, among other innocents. But don't worry! Mike Gallagher has an ass-pull that absolves Dulcy of the crime. See, dragons have souls that live forever. They'll just be reborn in new bodies. This presumably means Dulcy's reincarnated mother will remember that time her daughter burned her to death. It's a really dumb, last minute plot turn that ruins an otherwise decent story. It feels like Gallagher forgot what Robians were exactly until the last minute, throwing in the immortal soul business to cover his ass.

Aside from making Dulcy a cold-blooded killer, “The Price of Flame” is notable for another reason. It would be Art Mawhinney's final credit on the book. I've written a lot about Mawhinney's art since beginning this retrospective. So it should be known that he's one of my favorite “Sonic” artist. As far as final bows goes, “The Price of Flame” is a decent one. The characters are expressive, the lines are crisp, and the action is dynamic. I just wish the script was up to Art's standards. As far as I can tell, Mawhinney has mostly retired from working on comics, with his most recent work being on kid's Look-N-Find books. (James Fry draws the cover story and does a decent job, by the way.)

I can't really give issue 156 a good review, considering the obvious problems both the cover story and back-up has. Mike Gallagher's work has always been full of sloppy elements while Ken's skills seriously atrophied near the end of his run. But at least that dumb Evil Antoine business is finally resolved. Just when he was beginning to become a decent bad guy too! All and all, it's another middling issue in a series clearly running out of steam. For those who own the print edition, I hope you enjoyed that five page long HeroScape ad in the middle of the book. [5/10]

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 155

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 155
Publication Date: November 2005

With Karl Bollers bullied out of the book, Ken Penders was allowed to claim Archie's “Sonic the Hedgehog” comic as more-or-less his own. For some reason, for his first act as sole head writer, he returned to the childish romantic melodrama that characterized the awful Anti-Sonic switcharoo. Penders' continued bumbling through the love lives of Sonic and company is baffling, for a few reasons. But mostly because the love story between Knuckles and Julie-Su was actually one of the better aspect of Ken's “Knuckles” series. Maybe Ken's obvious echidna favoritism played a role in that or, perhaps, his skills have just degraded with age? Either way, “Line of Succession,” the story arc beginning in issue 155, is another notorious stinker.

The story begins with King Acorn and Queen Alicia returning home, following their long trip abroad. Instead of doing something interesting with that, the failed diplomacy trip is brushed aside with a few lines of dialogue. Anyway, it turns out that Antoine – or rather Anti-Antoine, still masquerading as the real deal – has been poisoning the king. His health failing, the King informs Sally that the time has come for to ascend to the throne. And she can't do that unless she's married, with Antoine being chosen as her suitor. Which is all according to the villain's plan. When Sonic hears this news, he's pretty upset.

We've known Antoine's evil double has been living in his shoes for at least five issues now. Antoine's gradual asshole-ification has been going on for at least a year, inside and outside the book. After all that, the comic has finally gotten around to providing some insight to Anti-Antoine's master plan. Essentially, he's been planning to murder the king and take the crown for himself. Which is admittedly a more nuanced plan then Anti-Sonic's scheme to score with as many chicks as possible. Anti-Antoine even gets a decent action beat, when he pins Sonic with his sword and kicks him into a river. But I'm not sure why it took so long for the wicked coyote – or the writers, for that matter – to get around to doing this.

Sadly, most of “Line of Succession” is devoted to brain dead romantic melodrama. Of all the book's misbegotten love triangles, the Sonic/Sally/Antoine triangle has been dead and buried for the longest period of time. Even that bullshit about the King insisting Sally marry Antoine has been a moot point for a while. Remember when Max flat-out told Sally he was fine with her dating Sonic? That character development goes out the window here, as the King dismisses Sally's relationship with the hedgehog as a silly bit of juvenilia. At least Anti-Antoine doesn't actually feel anything for Sally, wanting to marry her strictly for the sake of power. But it's still dumb.

Give credit where it's due. At least Princess Sally gets a smidgen of agency. After her dad informs her that she'll marry Antoine, Sally is understandably aghast. After the required amount of hand-wringing and tears that has sadly become typical for Sal, she thinks the situation over. She decides to go through with the marriage, not because she's forced into it, but because it's her duty as the People's Princess and the leader of Knothole. Yes, some nudging from Antoine helps her come to this conclusion. But it's something. She's not entirely a pawn in the plot, pushed around by the whims of the writer.

Sadly, the melodramatic shenanigans do not end there. The issue opens with Tails walking in on Sonic and Fiona making out. As the fox is still crushed on Fiona, from his encounter with the robotic version so long ago, it's a harsh moment for him. The Tails/Fiona thing has been simmering for a while so it's disappointing that it ends so curtly. Especially since Sonic and Fiona have never previously been an item. Furthermore, I'm not a fan of the book continue to push Sonic as a lady's man. Later in the issue, he refers to Bunnie as “babe,” suggesting there's still some sexual tension between them. I don't know why Ken wrote Sonic as such a cad. That was Anti-Sonic that was screwing around on everybody, right? Why is the real deal still doing this?

Just as Sally and Antoine are walking down the aisle, we head to our back-up story. Dulcy the Dragon takes center stage in “The Price of Flame.” At some point in the past, the Freedom Fighters asked Dulcy to light a ceremonial fire. The dragon flies away, tears in her eyes. In flashback, Dulcy reveals her past and how she lost her ability to breath fire.

Dulcy the Dragon has long been a much neglected part of the “Sonic” supporting cast. So it's nice for her to get a story arc to herself. Further more, in all this time, we've never learned much about Dulcy's background. Mike Gallagher finally fills us in. After her family was robotocized, Dulcy lived in an underground colony of dragons called Vesuvio. Contact with the outside world was forbidden. When it was discovered that Dulcy had been sneaking out to fight Robotnik, she's punished with exile. Her fire breathing abilities are also stymied, by switching out her black “scorch ring” with a power inhibiting gold Power Ring. Now, she's returning home for the first time in years.

It's as decent a backstory as any and explains why we've met so few other dragons. But Mike Gallgher's approach could've been better. As Dulcy flies back to Vesuvio, she explains her past in detail. Which amounts to a series of panels, large narration boxes overhead. It's doesn't feel much like a story, working more like an encyclopedia listing. In other words: it's another heaping load of exposition.

Worst yet, I'm pretty sure Mike wrote this story just to clear up a minor continuity error. In the past, Dulcy's nose ring has been colored as either gold or black. This is explained as Dulcy painting her golden ring black sometimes, in shame over loosing her powers. Really, Mike, we don't care about coloring errors. You don't have to devote a whole story to justifying them.

At least there's no stinky Ron Lim or Al Bigley artwork this time. James Fry draws the cover story. Fry's artwork is confident, full of expression and anime-style movement, but he's having a bit of an off-day. He even utilizes some Jon Grey style big, cartoony emotions a few times, to mixed affect. Art Mawhinney draws the back-up story. Dulcy, being a very cute character, looks good in his style. I really love the flashbacks to Dulcy's early days with the Freedom Fighters, which really brings us back to the SatAM years. Of course, lending such a cute style to a horde of multi-colored dragons does have the side effect of making this story feel like an episode of “Dragon Tales” sometimes. That's not Art's fault. Probably.

The cover story is less outright bad then it's just mostly mediocre and unnecessary, with several really obnoxious writing flaws. The back-up shoves too much info, awkwardly, into too small a place. It's pretty lame and another example of how badly this book dragged in 2005. But let's appreciate small miracles. At least the real Antoine will be back soon. This other guy is a prick. [5/10]

Sonic X: Issue 2

Sonic X: Issue 2
Publication Date: October 2005

In its second issue, “Sonic X” seems to establish its tone more concretely. You see, kids, this is suppose to be the funny Sonic comic. The story is light weight and silly, filled with many goofy moments and gags that intentionally lean on the fourth wall. From what I've seen of the actual “Sonic X” cartoon, it is slightly more serious than this. Then again, I'm even less familiar with the English dub. Maybe it's sillier? Anyway, on with the review.

Following last issue's adventure, Sonic and friends are invited by the fucking President on a special mission. The unique energy signature of a Chaos Emerald has been detected under the sea, within a well known pirate ship wreck. Sonic, Rouge, and some government secret agent chick named Topaz go diving. Tails and Grandpa Chuck stay above water. Turns out the whole journey is a trap. Eggman, utilizing the power rings he grabbed from Sonic last time, has replicated the signal. Once Sonic and friends are inside the ship, Eggman sends a new set of robots – robot dragons piloted by komodo dragons – to attack.

We're only on the second issue of “Sonic X” and a formula is already setting in. This is how it goes: Eggman designs some new ridiculous robots – both have been animal themed thus far – to destroy Sonic. While the hedgehog and his friends are out on some sort of journey, they are attacked by the aforementioned robots. The fight continues until it reaches its most dramatic point. Sonic then grabs a Power Ring, which affords him the extra strength to wreck Eggman's new machine. I have no idea if “Sonic X” will stick with this story outline throughout its entire forty issue run but I can imagine it wearing thin quickly.

Issue 2's sole story is brilliantly entitled “See Sonic! Sea Battle! See Sonic Sea Battle!” This points towards the jokey tone. Writer Joe Edkin frequently employs meta gags in order to cover up a sloppy plot. When the President mentions that Sonic's next mission will take him to a sunken pirate wreck, he references having a similar adventure once before. This is apparently a reference to an episode of the show. Edkin hastily attempts to cover this up but the truth, that he's recycling plots from the cartoon, is apparent. Some other gags are better. Such as the ship being named “The MacGuffin,” an amusing gag that isn't paid too much undue attention.

I'm willing to go along with most of Edkin's silliness. There's even some gags that border genuinely absurd. Such as the surly komodo dragons or Eggman's robot henchmen whispering to themselves, how disinterested they are in their boss' mad plan. Yet there's one gag that steps over the line for me. In the final act, a mysterious figure appears and removes the batteries from the komodo-bots. This frees the power rings, allowing Sonic to save the day. Who is this intervening stranger? It is the ghost of the Pirate Captain, a character so otherwise unimportant he doesn't even have a Mobius Encyclopedia entry. It's a joke but gags shouldn't resolve the plot like that.

Last time, Sonic's supporting cast barely got any page space. Issue 2 does give a little development to the hedgehog's friends. Rouge's thought bubbles frequently inform us that she's only going on this mission because she might get a shiny jewel out of this. The stand-out sequence comic involves a shark attacking the boat. Topaz – a character I'm otherwise unfamiliar with – fights the shark off with a candelabra that is also provided by the ghost pirate. Knuckles puts in an appearance too, doing more then just brooding on his island.

Truthfully, aside from a random appearance by an angry shark, my favorite aspect of “See Sonic Sea Battle” is the simmering sexual tension between the cast members. Topaz – who spends the entire comic in a skin tight diving suit, it must be noted – is the only living thing Rouge actually expresses concern or interest in. The bat declares that no one will hurt the woman, as if she belongs to her or something. When Knuckles jumps in, by punching a robot dragon in the face, Topaz outright proclaims that she would hit on the echidna if he was human. Maybe I'm reading too much into it but I couldn't help but notice these things.

Artist Tim Smith III returns from the first issue. His pencils remain competent if slightly flat. Sonic in his diving gear looks a little awkward. The shark barely resembles an actual shark to start. After getting beaten up, the shark looks even weirder. Smith seems have the most difficulty drawing Tails, as the fox looks perpetually baffled. Still, the art is fine, you guys.

The whole comic is fine, you guys. As I said last time, I hope the comic develops a little more complexity as it goes on. This issue is fitfully amusing and has its moments without making much of an impression on the reader. It needed more random shark attacks, I guess is what I'm saying. [6/10]

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 154

Sonic the Hedgehog: Issue 154
Publication Date: October 2005

I didn't mention it last time, as I was too busy discussing Karl Bollers' in-coming retirement from “Sonic,” but Archie has drafted a new artist to work on their covers. Sanford Greene would draw a few covers for the book before gracefully disappearing. Greene's brief tenure as cover artist is probably due to his underwhelming – some would say garish or “ass ugly” - artwork. Patrick Spaziante would quickly return before soon-to-appear regular artist Tracey Yardley would mostly take over cover duties, with Spaz occasionally putting in an appearance. Anyway, on with the show.

The second part of “Songoose” begins with Mina being informed that Sonic and the Freedom Fighters will be acting as her bodyguards. This does not sit well with Ash, Mina's boyfriend/manager. He quickly butts heads with Sonic, believing that his girlfriend still has feelings for the speedy hedgehog. He's not entirely wrong. Personal matters are put aside when Robotnik sends new versions of Heavy and Bomb to attack the concert, endangering everyone's lives.

Ash's doubts aren't without good reasons. As I've pointed out, it's obvious that Mina still has a thing for Sonic. Of course, the problem is that Ash expresses these concerns in the worst way imaginable. Upon hearing that Sonic is going to be Mina's bodyguard, he immediately jumps down the guy's throat. He then confronts Mina in a passive-aggressive fashion, breaking up with her afterwards. As if that wasn't bad enough, he then picks a fight with Sonic. Keep in mind, this happens after the robots attack the concert. When Mina expresses her annoyance with Ash's antics, he starts dropping the love bomb. None of this changes my earlier impression of Ash Mongoose. He's an overly macho, emotionally manipulative asshole.

Of course, Ash just being left an asshole wouldn't be enough for Karl. He has to give the guy a redemptive moment. He ends up saving Mina's life. After an individual Bomb appears in her dressing room, he leaps on the explosion. This seems to prove to Mina that Ash really does loves her. They reconcile in the hospital. (Too bad for Mina that Ash will still be an asshole when he wakes up. That's what abusive boyfriends are like.) Sonic looks on sadly. If you're keeping count, this is roughly the ten thousandth time the comic has buried the Sonic/Mina romance. I think it does stick this time though, thank Christ.

As an action story, “Mongoose” is pretty underwhelming. The army of Bombs are mostly dealt with off-panel by Bunnie, Amy, and Tails. This doesn't make the collection of robotic suicide bombers seem very effective, do they? Heavy doesn't do much better. The bell-shaped 'bot tangos with Sonic briefly. The hedgehog dodges all the attacks easily, further undermining any tension. Sonic utilizes an old trick to defeat Heavy. He spins around, drilling a hole into the ground, dropping the robot into what appears to be well water. It's a move we've seen before, against one of the more uninspired enemies we've seen recently.

The conclusion of “Songoose” makes it clear that the assassination attempts were never the main point of the story. After his second attack is deflected, Robotnik simply gives up on this particular mission. Karl tries to wring some humor out of this, with Robotnik dismissing Mina's second album songs as inferior. It still comes off as a cheap, lazy conclusion. I can gleam the truth. This two-parter was more about squeezing more drama out of the Sonic/Mina romance, not about Eggman trying to kill the pop princess.

In the back pages, we greeted to a Ken Penders' joint named “More Than Meets the Eye.” The Knothole Brain Trust – Tommy, Rotor, Tails, Uncle Chuck, Snively, Fiona for some reason – are studying a sample of nanites. Tommy ponders on the meaning of life before taunting the nanites into attacking him. The microscopic machines then bond with the back of the turtle's shell. Somehow, he forms a neurological connection with the nanites. Tommy discovers that, just by thinking something, the machines will make it, allowing him to sprout wings or a jet pack from his shell or some such bullshit.

By this point, the fandom remained hostile to Tommy Turtle's return. The simple fact was the character had no reason to be in the book. Instead of just killing him off again, Archie's own brain trust insisted on keeping Tommy around. First, they tried to turn him into Rotor's neat freak partner. When that failed to make him interesting, Penders touched upon a far dumber idea: Turn the Turtle into a fucking Transformer. It's a bad idea, as Tommy's problem wasn't his lack of superpowers. Giving him new abilities does nothing to resolve the character's biggest issue. That he has no business being in the book in the first place. Setting up this new ability – in a very awkward, borderline nonsensical manner – is all “More Than Meets the Eye” accomplishes.

Art wise, all of issue 154 looks pretty shitty. I said Ron Lim was getting better last time. Any ground he gained previously, he looses once more. “Songoose: Part 2” is probably Lim's worst pencils in quite some time. His crowd shots are embarrassing, as the collection of Mobians look totally blank-eyed. Sonic, Sally, and Mina seemingly spend the entire story with static, “annoyed” expressions on their faces. The action is incredibly sloppy, with Sonic and Heavy bending off-model several times. Penders draws “More Than Meets the Eye” himself. As usual, his pencils are stiff, disproportionate, and blank faced. Ken really doesn't know how to draw turtles, as Tommy's appearance changes from panel to panel. The late in the story action is as lifeless as always.

It's fitting that Karl Bollers' final contribution to the book would revolve around Mina, by far his most enduring addition to the “Sonic” cast. I guess he wanted the final word on a character that clearly meant something to him. Karl's legacy on the book is a mixed one. He wrote some of my favorite stories and some of my most hated. At his best, he was probably the most ambitious, insightful writer “Sonic” ever had. At his worst, he wrote pointless plot twists and frustrating romantic melodrama. Either way, I am sad to see him go.

(Though the story has a happy ending. Unlike some former Sonic writers, Karl would go on to bigger and better things, eventually earning an Eisner Award nomination for “Watson & Holmes,” his modern update of Arthur Conan Doyle's famous detectives. He has also, thus far, not sued Archie for anything.) [5/10]