Sonic X, Episode 1.12: Beating Eggman, Part One

Sonic X, Episode 1.12: Beating Eggman, Part One

Japanese Title: Attack on the Eggman Base, Part One

Japanese Air Date: June 22nd, 2003

U.S. Air Date: November 22nd, 2003

Throughout these reviews, I've been referring to the collecting of the Chaos Emeralds as the main driving plot point of "Sonic X's" story arc at this point. While I am technically not wrong, this series is apparently broken up into several defined arcs across its seasons. The first arc of season one is called the New World Saga, the apparent focus being on getting Sonic and friends familiar with Earth. The Chaos Emeralds Saga, presumably focused on collecting the Emeralds, starts afterwards. The aforementioned New World Saga wraps up with episodes 12 and 13, which are also the show's first proper two-parter. 

The U.S. president decides to finally take direct action against Eggman. They are sending a fleet of jets and battleships to attack his base but they are merely a distraction. A squad of soldiers, led by Rouge, will sneak inside the base while this is happening and destroy the doctor's power source. Meanwhile, Tails, Chris, Amy and Frances are flying around looking for Chaos Emeralds. They find one in a cornfield outside Tingaling Villa – another hilarious Japanese attempt to create an American sounding name – and begin digging. Eggman quickly appears with a dangerous new robot, determined to take the emerald first. This is right around when Sonic leaps into action.

Last time, I questioned why the President didn't just order an air strike on Eggman's base. Much to my surprise, this is exactly what he does in the next episode. And it's revealed why it's not such a good idea. Eggman's defenses easily shred several battleships and jets. Considering this frontal assault was always planned as a distraction, it's sort of hilarious that the government was willing to sacrifice hundreds of millions of dollars in military vehicles just to draw the doctor's attention. (Not to mention the lives of the presumed men and women operating these jets and battleships.) And he wasn't even home at the time, this defense being carried out by Decoe and Bocoe! Maybe they should've done some intel first? Your tax dollars at work, American readers. 

Whether or not this is actually a sound strategy is almost besides the point. The real reason the show devotes so much of this episode to the attack on Eggman's base is because it looks cool. From the beginning, I've suspected that the people working on "Sonic X" would much rather be working on a mecha show. You can see this in the fairly realistic, militaristic designs of Eggman's machines and how much loving attention is devoted to the action. Bullet casings fly out of the robots' machine guns (Hilariously censored in the 4Kids dub with hastily added laser sound effects), jets are torn apart, and missiles are detailed as they sail through the air. I'm not complaining, it's entertaining. Though it is pretty funny to see this stuff in an otherwise light-hearted "Sonic" cartoon. 

The President launching a military assault on a terrorist that has attacked America several times is not the only logical action in this episode. It turns out Mr. Stewart has actually been reporting everything he's learned back to the White House, which includes Sonic and his friends living with the Thorndykes. It's good to know all those slapstick antics were actually plot relevant! (He also gave Chris a nifty pair of goggles, which the boy never once suspects is a tracking device.) This leads to the White House Press Secretary knocking on the Thorndyke's door and asking Sonic to come with them. I gotta say, I'm really happy this show isn't dragging this plot point out any further. The government is aware of Sonic's hiding place and is ready to address him, directly asking him for his help in fighting Eggman. You have to wonder why they didn't do this sooner but, eh, at least it's done now. 

Having all this crazy shit happen at the same time as Chris and Tails discovering an Emerald is an interesting choice. Cutting between the heavy action at Eggman's base to a bunch of children messing around in a cornfield is certainly a contrast. These scenes definitely feel much more like what you'd expect from "Sonic X." Frances wants to go sight-seeing and Tails has to remind her they're on a mission. The X-Tornado reveals itself as a full-on rip-off of "Robotech's" Valkyries when it sprouts legs. Eggman shows up with a goofy robot – named E35 Funfun – that has an enormous turbine in its chest. He attempts to blow the heroes away, which works pretty well for him. In a normal episode, this is right around when Sonic would swoop in and save the day.

Speaking of Sonic... He is in this cartoon, right? Amusingly, this is yet another episode that the titular hedgehog plays a small role in. His actions in this episode include: Complaining about how he's run around the entire continental U.S. and is now bored, running off to save Tails and Chris when he notices they aren't around, and napping on the roof of the Thorndyke mansion. I can't really blame "Sonic X's" show runners for often sidelining what is ostensibly the main character. He's been depicted as so powerful, able to destroy Eggman's schemes with such ease, that it's hard to write a compelling action story around him. The geopolitical consequences of Eggman appearing on Earth is more interesting than repetitive plots of Sonic grabbing a Power Ring and immediately making scrap metal of the Robot of the Week.

I guess I now understanding why so many fans resent Chris for "stealing the spotlight" from Sonic on this show. If I was a small child in 2003, I might've been bummed out that Sonic has so little to do in a show with his name in the title. Yet I still enjoy how this episode actually builds on the events of the series so far. It's action packed, develops the show's world, and moves the overall arc forward quite a bit. And Chris doesn't whine much in this episode, so his presence here is tolerable. Also, Rouge dresses as a ninja and flirts with Topaz more, Cream eats a pie, Amy's skirt gets blown up by the turbine bot, Knuckles sneaks aboard a jet, and Eggman complains about an infomercial. A good time was had by all! [7/10]

Sonic X, Episode 1.11: Fly Spy

Sonic X, Episode 1.11: Fly Spy

Japanese Title: The Beautiful and Mysterious Thief Rouge

Japanese Air Date: June 15th, 2003

U.S. Air Date: November 15th, 2003

Rouge the Bat has been a member of the "Sonic" cast for twenty years now, which is long enough for her to be considered an essential character for many fans. I'm old, so I remember the reaction to Rouge when she was first introduced. A "Sonic" character with jiggle physics was met with skepticism by some people. There was a line of thought that it was a desperate attempt to appear edgy or a plea to the seedier corners of the furry fandom. Yet, once the game actually came out, Rouge was fairly well received. Part of why the bat became a beloved member of the "Sonic" cast was likely the prominent role she played in "Sonic X." Ten episodes after her cameo in the first installment, Rouge would get a proper introduction. 

Rouge has apparently been biding her time in Earth, stealing jewels whenever it pleases her and lusting after the Chaos Emeralds. After overhearing a tip from Chris Thorndyke's teacher that an Emerald was found in an abandoned warehouse, Rouge investigates... But it's a trap by the U.S. government to ensnare the notorious thief. She is offered immunity for her past crimes if she agrees to help the government take on Eggman. The Rouge-led infiltration of his base goes awry when a noisy security bot attacks, though the bat still establishes herself as a willing agent of the state. Oh yeah, Sonic is somewhere in there too. 

What I like about Rouge is that, while she's not evil by any means, she's not really a full-fledged good guy either. She ultimately does whatever she wants, motivated primarily by her obsession with shiny gems. If that happens to help save the world, so be it. That doesn't concern her so much. The "Sonic X" version of the character understands that perfectly. She's introduced snatching a giant diamond from a museum. When the President offers her the deal, she agrees to it solely because it'll get her closer to the Chaos Emeralds. And, yeah, the sex appeal doesn't hurt. It's amusing to me that, despite all the weird censorship 4Kids did to this show, they left Rouge's generous cleavage intact. 

Another amusing element of this episode is Rouge's witty repartee with Topaz. Topaz is the stern professional G.U.N. agent who oversees Rouge's capture and first meeting. From their very first scene together – which features an S&M joke loooool – Rouge is poking holes in Topaz's overly serious composure. She calls her an old lady and mocks her fashion sense. (Even though Topaz wears earrings and lip gloss into combat.) Topaz seems to relish putting a Snake Plissken-style exploding bracelet on her but Rouge doesn't let that get her down either. By the end, despite their constant snipping at one another, the two are working together like pros. It's a classic buddy cop dynamic that I love and really keeps the energy lively and fun throughout. 

This episode is also notable for the U.S. government finally deciding to actually do something about Eggman. You can tell an American didn't write this, because they don't just send in jets to carpet-bomb his base out of existence. It's actually determined that Eggman's tech is too powerful for the U.S. military and that a partnership with this Sonic creature, or someone like him, must be forged. Wait, you're telling me the president decided extreme military intervention wasn't a solution to a terrorism problem? During the Bush administration?! Despite that detachment from reality, it's nice to see the show's elected officials actually deciding to do something about the mad scientist from another planet who has publicly announced his intentions to take over the world. 

Of course, the real reason the President doesn't just drop a nuke on Eggman is because that wouldn't make for a very fun action sequence. Rouge and Topaz and a trope of G.U.N. goons heading into Eggman's base does lead to lots of action. In an amusingly weird touch, the robot the heroes fight utilizes ultrasonic sound weapons... Which manifest as the robot, punningly named E-70 Noizi, speaking with the voice of a high-pitched child. A giant kill-bot talking about being afraid, while crying like a toddler, is too bizarre not for me to love it. (4Kids did remove this from the dub, because bat boobs may be acceptable for American children but quirky robots are not.) The action scene also features tons of gunfire and explosions, lots of robots going up in flames. Chekov's exploding bracelet saves the day, a satisfying turn, and Rouge and Topaz outrun a fireball. Good, wholesome fun. 

You might notice that I've barely mentioned Sonic or Chris in the last six paragraphs. That's because they have almost nothing to do in this episode. If it wasn't for Chris' teacher mentioning the fraudulent emerald, in an attempt to capture Sonic that grabs a Rouge instead, they wouldn't contribute anything to the plot. Rouge changes the road sign to the factory, leading Sonic and the gang on a wild goose chase. They are totally left out of the action-packed climax, the hedgehog and his friends only putting in token appearances. I don't mind this at all and, in fact, I think it's pretty funny. Despite their small roles, Chris still has a scene where he whines about Sonic, when the hedgehog almost falls off the X-Tornado. Maybe you should actually sit in the cockpit, Sonic! Also, Chris casually introduced Danny to the furries as if they aren't intergalactic fugitives or something. 

If this show was to become The Sexy Adventures of Rouge and Topaz full-time, I probably wouldn't mind too much. Apparently, their relationship becomes even more subtextually sapphic as the show goes on, which is already blatantly obvious. This is definitely the most entertaining episode of "Sonic X" thus far. My only real complaint is that they reuse the animation of Rouge doing her Screw Kick attack a few times. I guess kids action anime just can't resist doing that shit... Anyway, I liked this one a lot. [8/10]

Sonic X, Episode 1.10: Unfair Ball

Sonic X, Episode 1.10: Unfair Ball

Japanese Title: Fierce Fight! Sonic Baseball Team

Japanese Air Date: June 8th, 2003

U.S. Air Date: November 8th, 2003

Baseball may pretentiously declare itself to be America's pastime but this tedious, awful sport is actually far more beloved overseas than it is in the States. In Japan, baseball actually is a national obsession. Baseball was introduced to Japan by an American English professor in 1878. Twenty years later, a group of Japanese high school students would beat a team of pro athletes and the sport's popularity would explode. A pro-league was established in the 1920s and the country would never look back. Baseball remains Japan's most popular sport even though it is, as previously established, completely terrible. Despite having nothing to do with the property, the country's uncontrollable fetish for the sport is presumably why the tenth episode of "Sonic X" is about baseball. 

Tails is joy-riding around in the X-Tornado when he notices the Chaos Emerald within is uncontrollably drawn towards a baseball diamond. There, he meets Albert Butler, the groundskeeper of the diamond which is about to be demolished, despite the years Butler has spent maintaining the diamond's natural grass. Tails soon discovers Butler has the Blue Chaos Emeralds, which sends a signal into the sky. Eggman and Sonic's buddies arrive shortly afterward, deciding to play a baseball game to decide who will get the Emerald. Eggman, naturally, is not interested in playing fair. 

Baseball sucks and is the worst of all professional sports, all of which are horrible. The characters on "Sonic X" doesn't seem to realize this. Apparently, baseball is the only thing Chuck loves more than robotics. Mr. Tanaka believes entirely in the seriousness of the sport. Mr. Butler's situation is treated with utmost sincerity. Naturally, the spectacle of Sonic and Eggman playing a game in the abandoned diamond attracts a crowd, which saves Albert's job and earns him much respect. There are several jokes based around the rules of baseball, all of which are lost on me as the rules of baseball are complete fucking gibberish. 

Luckily, most of "Unfair Ball" — is that a pun? I have no idea — is focused on cartoon absurdity. Eggman's team of baseball playing robots cheat in ridiculous ways, by extending their limbs or flying into the air. Amy smashes several players via hitting too hard apparently. Pretty sure that would be a foul or a penalty or whatever. At one point, Sonic even breaks the fourth wall and acknowledges that this a cartoon and they shouldn't be taking things so seriously. The best joke comes when Knuckles points out how stupid it is that they're playing a game for the emerald, instead of just taking it, which all his friends shake him for. The weirdest joke comes when Cream tells the pitching robot she likes him, causing him to drop the ball. The show even does soft-focus, romantic shading and draws Cream with plump lips in this scene. You guys do realize she's six, right? 

Despite everything pointing towards "Sonic Baseball Team" being one of the goofy filler episodes, this one actually advances the overall story arc for the season. In this episode, we learn that Chaos Emeralds are drawn towards each other like magnets. When put together, the Emeralds shoot blue pillars of light into the sky like the last act of a superhero movie. The episode concludes with Eggman getting away with the Blue Emerald, something everyone is apparently okay with because Butler's job was saved in the process. I was really hoping Knuckles would say "fuck it," fly up there and steal the Emerald back himself. No dice. 

Even in an episode so concerned with slapstick and the employment status of old groundskeepers in dying sports, "Sonic X" must take time to acknowledge Chris Thorndyke's wafer-thin ego. Early on, Chris and his servants are trying to train Sonic and his friends in proper table etiquette. This prompts Sonic to say he can't wait to get the fuck out of here. Even though this should be entirely expected behavior for Sonic, Chris' feelings are hurt. Later, Chris steps up to the mound... or pitch or whatever the fuck it is... and is overwhelmed by his lack of self-confidence. It takes a pep talk from Sonic for Chris to even attempt to swing the bat. See, parents, these are the balls of anxiety and self-doubt you get when you're never around to hug your kids. I bet Chris needs a pep-talk from Sonic when he clogs the toilet or misses the school bus too. 

Also, this is somehow the first episode of "Sonic X" where Tails is seen flying with his tails. Otherwise known as the defining character attribute that he's literally named for. Weird. It's a pretty dumb episode but also far from the worst "Sonic" cartoon about sports, so I won't be too harsh on it. [5/10]

Sonic: Night of the Werehog

Sonic: Night of the Werehog (2008)

It's that time again, Hedgehogs Can't Swim readers. We are a mere 48 hours away from Halloween, the spookiest night of the year and my personal favorite holiday. As I usually do in late October, I celebrate the occasion by writing about something creepy, scary, or at least a little spooky related to the "Sonic" franchise. This is not always easy to do. "Sonic" is a series meant for children, of course, so it tends to shy away from frightening shit... Except for that one time it made a classic horror trope a core gameplay mechanic in a flagship title. 

Now, I love old monster movies. I live for that shit. Yet I'm not really a fan of the Werehog, as I've expressed in the past. There's a couple of reasons for this. Mostly because I think "Sonic Unleashed" is a mediocre game, yet one more in a long series of mediocre "Sonic" games. I also always thought it was weird that Sonic, already a cartoon hedgehog, could turn into a cartoon werewolf thing as well. Even this is not the real reason I dislike the Werehog premise so much.

The truth is... It's not scary. Sega introduced the idea of werewolves into Sonic's world but didn't let him do anything werewolf-like. He pretty much just acts like a slightly grumpier version of Sonic. They even gave the Werehog a bizarre superpower, of rubbery, stretchy limbs. Ya know, like... werewolves are... known to have??? It was simply a stupid game mechanic, that didn't really affect the characters or narrative in any significant way. It just meant the cool, 2D side-scrolling parts of the game had to pause so we could play a tedious, half-assed brawler. If Sega was going to monsterify Sonic, they should've tried a whole hell of a lot harder. 

Nevertheless, my petty old fanboy bitching aside, the Werehog is beloved in certain corners of the "Sonic" fandom. Mostly by people who played "Unleashed" when they were kids. (That game now being thirteen years old is far scarier than any movie monster could ever be.) And "Unleashed" did lead to a number of amusing side-projects. Such as "Sonic: Night of the Werehog," a haunted house-themed eleven minute short film released in, uh, late November to help promote the video game. 

The plot of "Night of the Werehog" concerns a towering mansion somewhere in the countryside, occupied by three ghosts. That would be Lah, a cutesy female spirit, and two buffoonish male ghosts, Su and Uh. The boys try and win Lah's affection by snapping photographs of visitors to the mansion after they've frightened them. For undefined reasons, Sonic and Chip step into this mansion. Upon seeing a photo of Sonic — which Su and Uh snapped some pics of while photographing the easily spooked Chip — Lah is enamored. Su and Uh go into a jealous rage and attack Sonic, who quickly transforms into the Werehog. 

If nothing else, I enjoy the spooky ambiance of "Night of the Werehog." Even though there have been a few vaguely Halloween themed levels over the years, Sega has never truly embraced a spooky aesthetic before in the games. So just seeing Sonic hanging out inside a rickety old mansion, with creepy old portraits and dusty furniture hanging around, is fun. The moment Su and Uh possess old suits of armor and harass the heroes feel like Sonic and Chip have dropped into the middle of an episode of "Scooby-Doo." And I can definitely appreciate that. 

Sadly, "Night of the Werehog" does not focus solely on spooky vibes and goofy, ghost-adjacent tomfoolery. Like all "Sonic" media is cursed to do, this degrades into juvenile action theatrics eventually. Su and Uh fuse together into a beefy cartoon bull guy, that the furverts have definitely drawn porn of, and trade fisticuffs with the Werehog. I didn't quite understand how the ghost could shift in and out of the physical realm in this sequence. The fight mostly seems designed to show off the stretching powers Sonic has in this form. Which I've already declared to be my least favorite attribute of this character. I guess I think it would've been funnier if this spooky dilemma was resolved as a wacky misunderstanding and not an all-out brawl. 

Still, I do like the ghosts a lot. Su and Uh — I'm assuming those goofy names are weird Japanese puns that didn't quite translate — have amusingly cartoony designs. They remind me a lot of the nineties version of Casper's uncles, which strikes me as a likely influence. The mansion they hang out in has a really cool asymmetrical design too. And Lah, of course, is by far the most popular character to emerge from this film. That's probably because she's a kawaii anime girl. I genuinely like her design though. How the spectral body tapering off to a point is made to look like a dress or a mermaid tail, with a big pink bow on the end. How she's done up in these bright purples and pinks, even having a little heart on her cheek. Even though this is Lah's only real appearance in any “Sonic” media, you can still find fan art of her very easily. She's about as popular as a one-off can be. (Funny enough, the far less popular Su and Uh are the ones that actually appeared in “Sonic Unleashed,” albeit only as cameos.)

Another reason Lah might be popular is, well, she has a crush on Sonic. Or, more specifically, the Werehog. Yes, this cute little ghost girl is a certified furry and another potential love interest for Sonic. Even though this is a horror movie inspired cartoon, romance is really what's on its mind. Su and Uh hope to please Lah with their photographs, even after her fixation on Sonic begins. The concluding moment of “Night of the Werehog” has the ghost disguising herself with Chip, so she can get a selfie with the big fluffy werewolf. Some have interpreted this as a “say no to simping” moral, though Su and Uh's experience seems to have done nothing to discourage their attachment to Lah. Honestly, I sort of wish these characters would show up in the comics or something, as I'm curious about what the hell their story is.

Even though this cartoon is thirteen years old, it still looks pretty good. The animation was done by a company called Marza Animation Planet, which is a spin-off of Sega's game studio made to do CGI cartoons. Unsurprisingly, they have mostly worked on video game spin-offs, including last year's “Sonic the Hedgehog” feature film. The textures are pretty good, the lighting looks great, and the characters are expressive. Honestly, the degree of squash and stretch on display here would've been a smart thing to incorporate into the video games. It's pretty lively and nicely captures a feeling that is both cartoonishly silly and boo-haunted-house levels of laid-back Halloween fun.

The only real complaint I have about the animation is that maybe it's a little too detailed. The weird cartoon human designs from “Sonic Unleashed” are maintained, which I really don't like. So much of the plot involves taking pictures of characters' faces as they scream. So we are greeted to countless close-ups of Chip's face as his mouth hangs open and his tongue extends out. I'm not sure I really needed to see that. We probably could've done with a lot less of that. 

I don't know why it took me so long to watch “Night of the Werehog,” though I guess my indifference to “Sonic Unleashed” was probably a factor. It even got a push outside of the internet and gaming circles, as it was available to watch on Comcast's On Demand service back in the day. (It also played at some of those fancy arcades Sega has in Japan.) I bet kids would enjoy it and I managed to have some fun with it, even if it's still a relic from an era of “Sonic” history I'm not eager to revisit. It's probably the second best thing to come out of "Sonic Unleashed," after that one interview John Carpenter gave about the series. I'd say that's probably worth a [7/10.] 

Lastly and most importantly, Happy Halloween to all Hedgehogs Can't Swim readers! Get out there and trick or treat, if you can. If you can't, scarf down as much candy and sweets as possible. Watch spooky movies, read scary movies, carve a pumpkin, and generally revel in the spirit of the season.

Sonic the Hedgehog (IDW): Issue 46

Sonic the Hedgehog (IDW): Issue 46

Publication Date: October 27th, 2021

October always goes by in a blur for me. I spend the whole month watching and reviewing as many horror movies as I can. That project tends to take over my whole life for six weeks. Before I know it, Halloween is almost here... In fact, I'm so focused on that shit that I tend to forget about other things. Like comic books! Hey, did you know that a new issue of IDW's "Sonic" on-going came out today? I didn't! Well, I mean, I found out pretty quickly but it definitely caught me off-guard. Luckily, my devotion to you, dear readers, is such that I'll squeeze reading this comic in on my lunch break. 

Anyway! "Trial by Fire, Part 2" begins with Belle awakening in the blazing forest. Her hand is on fire and the same Motobug that startled her earlier appears to put out the flame. Tangle soon appears to help the little puppet out. The two continue further into the burning woods, to help locate the park ranger's missing son. Meanwhile, the crowds at the camp start to get out of control, the ranger hopelessly attempting to prevent a stampede. Amy and Jewel help restore order and organize a fire-fighting routine. But the danger is far from over...

Part two of "Trial by Fire" is mostly devoted to giving some characters big hero moments. The smoke in the forest debilitates Tangle, forcing Belle to take control of the situation. She commands Tangle to use her tail-activated pneumatic-leg super-stomping ability to help rescue the kid. A little later, in one of the issue's best moments, she uses a previously unseen comedic ability to calm the child's jangled nerves. Meanwhile, in the parking lot, Amy encourages Jewel to talk to the crowd. The bug is anxious at first, feeling like she's not qualified to lead and has done a shitty job with the Restoration lately. Amy gives Jewel the necessary pep talk and Jewel takes control of the angry mob. 

By some metrics, this is satisfying character development. Belle comes through when she's needed, overcoming her own insecurities to help someone in need. Belle is haunted by the idea that she's not cut out to be a hero but, here she is, being a hero almost on instinct. Jewel, meanwhile, is proving that she can be a creditable leader in a time of crisis. Yet, because I'm a grouchy old man that is impossible to please, I feel like the comic doesn't totally earn these moments. Belle's despair and anxiety has been so severe here of late, that I find it difficult to believe that she would get over them this quickly and save the day without even thinking about it. 

Jewel's big moment, meanwhile, isn't enough to overcome the fact that she is an awkward fit for a leadership position. That she has done a mediocre job with the Restoration, at least from most of the actual evidence the book has given us. Amy was a natural, cool leader in the comic's first two years and this recent attempt to slide her out of that position, and quickly set Jewel up as her replacement, still isn't working. I don't dislike Jewel but I still feel like we aren't invested enough in her to care about this stuff. All this moment really does is continue to weaken Amy's characterization, something the book is just committed to doing here of late. (Also, I don't accept that a crowd as angry as this one would accept Jewel barking orders at them, much less that they would wait for Amy to give her a pep talk first.)

And now it's time for me overanalyze other aspects of this comic book meant for children. Because this issue left me with a pretty big question: Where are the firefighters? An out-of-control fire is consuming a large forest and a single park ranger is the only official around to deal with it. Does Mobius​ "Sonic's world" not have any sort of public services? Did this civilization have any sort of government before the Restoration? I know Sega likes to make ridiculous sweeping statements like "money doesn't exist in Sonic's world," really throwing into question about how anything about this universe works. The complete lack of any sort of structure meant to let society function safely just makes Sonic's world as vague as possible. I'm guessing we aren't meant to think that hard about it but, goddamn, this shit bugs me.

I'm being very negative but I did enjoy some aspects of this issue. Mostly, the Helpful MotoBug. Observant Sonic nerds pointed out that the MotoBug that seemingly "attacked" Belle at the end of the last issue was, in fact, the MotoBug we saw Mr. Tinker working on back in issue 12. He's even maintained his habit of making topiaries shaped like Sonic's head. Helpful MotoBug continues to be helpful here, putting out the fire on Belle's hand and swooping in to help save the day at the issue's end. The character only has its body language to express itself, which does nothing to change how adorable it is. I love the way it cheers when Belle is safe, how it gingerly crosses its mandibles, even covering its eyes in fear at one point. How friggin' adorable is that? I hope Helpful MotoBug sticks around as Belle's sidekick. I want them to make a cuddly stuffed animal of this character now. 

Because this is an ongoing comic book, that must always tease the next big event, various events in this issue point towards the impending "Imposter Syndrome" mini-series. Surge and Kit, characters already beloved by the fandom despite the fact that they haven't actually done anything yet, briefly appear in silhouette. The last issue set up various red herrings about how this forest fire got started. It suggested that Belle's built-in lighter might have been responsible. Or maybe it was the ranger's son, Ashe, and his flammable Wisp friend that accidentally sparked the flame. Either event would have forced some characters to grapple with some juicy guilt, furthering a moral about forgiveness and responsibility towards the natural world. Nope, turns out it was just Surge and Kitt. The bad guys did the bad thing. Seems like a missed opportunity...

Also, Adam Bryce Thomas' artwork is just slightly off from his usual excellent standards in this issue. I'm not going to hold that against him. In fact, he still earns some points for sneaking in a surly porcupine Mobian in a trucker hat that bares more than a passing resemblance to Uncle Chuck. Am I being too hard on this issue? I certainly didn't dislike it but there are enough little things about it that are off, that prevent me from fully enjoying it. I suggest Evan include more Helpful MotoBug next time, that'll paste over all the flaws. [6.5/10]

Sonic X, Episode 1.09: The Last Resort

Sonic X, Episode 1.09: The Last Resort

Japanese Title: Amy on the Beach

Japanese Air Date: June 1st, 2003

U.S. Air Date: November 1st, 2003

Twice before, I've noted that, for whatever reason, the title "The Last Resort" was popular with the writers of the various "Sonic" cartoons. The writers of "Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog" and "Sonic Underground" both wrote an episode where our blue hero visits a vacation resort that is also a Robotnik trap. Both teams decided that "The Last Resort" was the most natural punny title for such a premise. I doubt the "Underground" team was aware of the earlier episode. When 4Kids localized "Sonic X," they took the descriptive if somewhat bland title "Amy on the Beach" and also changed it to "The Last Resort," even though the resort plays a small role in this episode. I'm betting this was also a coincidence but this happening three times in a row does make you wonder if there was some weird running joke going on here. (Recently, a "Sonic Boom" writer bemoaned his lack of awareness of this tradition. If he had known, we'd have a fourth "Last Resort" to look forward to.)

It's a little early in "Sonic X's" run for the traditional anime beach party episode but here we are anyway. Chris has to go in his mom's place to the opening of a luxurious seaside hotel. He'd rather be hanging out with his furry friends, who will be enjoying the beach at the Thorndyke's near-by private villa. Sonic opts out of attending, on account of his dislike of water, much to Amy's disappointment. As the crew chills on the beach, Eggman attacks the hotel Chris is at, planning to tear it down and build an amusement park in his image. Sonic eventually races into action, with Amy deciding to help.

My dislike of the Sonic/Amy ship is not just because I'm a lifelong Sonic/Sally fan. I've always found Amy's fixation on Sonic childish and her dogged pursuit of him bordering on the creepily obsessive. Yet I walked away from "Amy on the Beach" kind of getting it for the first time. Amy was looking forward to some ocean adjacent frolicking with Sonic. She fantasizes about the two of them splashing in the waves and all that. This characterizes her attraction to Sonic as a girlish crush... But it's kind of poignant too. In the episode's penultimate scene, Amy dreams about running behind Sonic on the beach... The love of her life always just a few steps ahead of her, always just out of reach. There's something wistful about that, a teenage girl hopelessly crushing on a guy she can never be with. 

Perhaps Amy's crush isn't too hopeless after all. After overhearing a human beach-goer making a lucky necklace for her boyfriend, to improve his swimming, Amy decides to do the same for Sonic. In the fight with Eggman, the necklace is crushed and then seemingly lost. That is until the final scene, which reveals Sonic not only held onto the bracelet but repair it too. Awwww! That's actually really cute. The way Amy vigorously defends Sonic from Eggman's centipede-bot, and Sonic later sucking it up and diving into the ocean to save Amy, suggests a mutual devotion that's more than platonic. 

Beyond the blatant ship-teasing, I suspect this episode is popular with young "Sonic" viewers for another reason: It has a lot of action. Eggman first attacks the hotel with a pretty cool looking octopus robot, which tangles Sonic up in its tentacles. An assist from Amy and a Power Ring leads to him smashing the machine, which then explodes gloriously. But we're not done yet, as Eggman's worker drones then combine into the aforementioned centipede-bot. This fight is not as cool to watch, as the image of Amy hammering away the various components of the machine are repetitively animated. But there's still plenty of mechanical mayhem in this one to entertain.

By this point, it's also pretty clear that the "Sonic X" version of Eggman is a goofball. He organizes an attack with a whole fleet of armed robots for the purpose of... Tearing down a hotel and putting up an amusement park? Seems like those resources have more practical applications, as far as world dominating goals go. Nevertheless, wanting to erect an amusement park themed after himself is a reoccurring obsession of Eggman, across pretty much all "Sonic" media. It's nice to see "Sonic X" carry on that tradition. I actually would've liked to have seen more of the twisted theme park stuff but this episode is pretty squarely focused on beach antics and Amy and Sonic's relationship.

"Sonic X" is definitely falling into a bit of a formula already. This is another episode that separates Sonic from his friends, so Eggman can wreck some havoc before our hedgehog hero zips in and saves the day. Chris also has a pretty small role in this episode, which probably belongs in the plus column. (Hard to relate too much to his "lonely little boy" vibes when we find out his family owns a fucking beachside villa. Chris, just do what all the other rich people do and pay someone to be your friend.) That kid needs to get his version of Jimmy Olsen's Superman Watch, if he's going to continuously need to get rescued by Sonic all the time. 

Anyway, this is a pretty cute episode. If nothing else, it's better than the other two "Last Resort" episodes. [7/10]

Sonic X, Episode 1.08: Satellite Swindle

Sonic X, Episode 1.08: Satellite Swindle

Japanese Title: Emergency Launch! X-Tornado

Japanese Air Date: May 25th, 2003

U.S. Air Date: October 25th, 2003

The eighth episode of "Sonic X" starts right off with the stock footage of Eggman inserting some playing cards into his computer and pulling the slot machine-like lever to choose his robot-of-the-week. This time, it's E-90 Peliculine, who is called "Super Sweeper" in the English dub. The bird-like robot flies into the upper atmosphere and sucks up all the Earth's satellites. This disrupts Chris and his furry friends watching TV, Eggman soon replacing all broadcast with his own show. Sonic and Tails fly after
E-90 but quickly find the Tornado can't handle operating at such high altitudes. Tails and Chuck decide to build a new Tornado, the X-Tornado, to take down this threat.

The last two episodes of "Sonic X" barely featured the titular hedgehog at all. Instead, they focused more on goofball scenarios playing out around Chris Thorndyke. While "Satellite Swindle" is still a pretty silly episode, Sonic at least plays a big role in it. This actually operates as an action cartoon for most of its runtime. Our blue dude with 'tude gets to leap around missiles flying through the sky. He casually leaps right through a government satellite in one scene, which is the kind of shit you do when you're a super-fast bad-ass. There's spin-dashing and robot smashing and big-ass explosions in this half-hour.

One could make the case that Sonic is actually too bad-ass in this episode. As the X-Tornado flies into the upper stratosphere, Sonic leap out of the cockpit and sits on the plane's hull. When ice starts to cover the jet, and creep over Sonic, Tails doesn't seem to think this is a cause for concern. He assures Chris that Sonic can take it, even when his entire body is frozen solid. I guess Sonic is so hot-blooded that he can handle existing in -50 degree temperatures at the edge of space. (Satellites are actually suspended in the exosphere, which is way colder than that.) While this is also true in the video games, where Sonic runs around in space all the time, it does make your suspension of disbelief to strain in a cartoon. 

Either way, Chris still has to hook up the X-Tornado's A/V cable to a Power Ring, to give Sonic the boost he needs to break out of the ice. After that, Sonic is even more unstoppable and quickly wrecks Eggman's plan. When I was reviewing Archie's "Sonic X" comic, I noted that quite a few early issues ended with Power Rings acting as Deus Ex Machinas, giving Sonic an improbable power boost needed to resolve all the story's problems. Now I see that the book was just being faithful to the TV show. As in "Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog," the hedgehog's ability to bend physics to his will makes you wonder why Eggman/Robotnik has ever been a threat to him. It really seems like Sonic could just grab a couple of rings and reduce Eggman's base to ashes in a few minutes. 

Even though this is definitely a more action-oriented episode than the last two, "Sonic X" still has to indulge its quirky sense-of-humor. That second scene has Cream watching a "Barney"-like TV show for pre-schoolers, featuring a large purple dancing creature named Next. When the TV goes out, she initially blames Tails — Cream just loves to shout accusations at her friends — but it soon becomes clear something bigger is going on. Instead of our intrepid heroes deciding that have more important things to worry about then television, everyone starts to bemoan the lack of their favorite programs. (Amy likes cooking shows and Mr. Tanaka likes samurai movies, by the way.) The scene then ends with Bokkun entering, yelling exposition, crying, and then exploding on Grandpa Chuck. Seeing "Sonic" characters exist alongside such mundane problems continues to strike me as surreal. 

This does not strike me as an especially important episode of "Sonic X" but it does make one significant contribution to the series' lore. That would be the introduction of the X-Tornado. Even though it's been established that the Tornado 2 has a jet mode, the series still felt the need to introduce a fancier airplane for Tails. The X-Tornado is powered by a Chaos Emerald and is outfitted with extra wings and bigger engines. It also has enough room inside for Chris, which I'm guessing was a primary reasoning behind its design. I can't say I really care for the design though. The X-Tornado looks more like something out of "Robotech" than "Sonic," resembling real world fighter jet than a cartoon bi-plane. This show's mechanical designer definitely prefers realism but still incorporates some of that cutesy "Sonic" energy into Eggman's robots — as seen in E-90's bird-like features — so I don't know why the X-Tornado is so boring looking.

By the way, what was the point of Eggman's scheme here? Was it holding all the world's satellites for ransom? Or was the point of the plan to replace all of Earth's broadcast with his own shows, that strictly exist to glorify him? That seems to be the gist of it but the script never actually specifies. Also, Sonic sure as fuck blows E-90 up at the end of the episode. Does that mean all the satellites were destroyed too? I guess not, as everything goes back to normal at the end. It definitely feels like this episode should've focused more on the entire tele-communications industry being crippled by Eggman's scheme, not just on TV signals being interrupted. It's possible I'm thinking too hard about this...

Aside from Cream's freak out when she can't watch her favorite show anymore, the cutest moment in this episode involves Amy taking up cooking as a hobby. She bakes a pie for Sonic and violently insists she be the one to give it him. Later, she makes him ice cream. I'm hardly a SonAmy shipper but I think Sonic might be a dumb-ass for not pursuing her. She made deserts for you, bro. That's love. Anyway, this is a mildly diverting episode though I think I might honestly prefer "Sonic X" in its goofier moods. [6/10]